FORUMS

Connect with people who understand what you are going through, seek advice and surround yourself with support. We're free, anonymous, and professionally moderated 24/7.

  • 47,612Members
  • 1,358,869Posts
  • 1,400,000Visitors
Our stories

A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

22,211 - 22,220 of 27,230

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Angels333 Thinking of you Hon Hope your pdoc appointment goes okay this week. I hear you about income and how hard it is when you need a break from everything but still need to work to be able to live - such a hard thing to have to work through

@eth Nearly holiday time - have a great trip Hon - enjoy your time away whilst you also care for your daughter. Much love to you Eth

Hi @Former-Member @Appleblossom and all visiting this thread this afternoon

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @Zoe7 and all here. Totally exhausted after 2nd appt with B. Went into a few bad places today and it is just so exhausting to even just touch on them. Monkey came and came out again. Helps to stay grounded having him to hold, squeeze, feel, and just know he is there. A friend gave me some lavendar oil so I have added a couple drops to his banana. May sound strange, but I love lavendar and having it there means that I can warm it in my hand to release the smell more. She said we may try some art next time to see if I can bring things out easier. So exhausting to just bring out things slightly.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

I hear you about that exhaustion @cutiepiekitty So many of my sessions were like that - especially when I first started with my psych. You are doing the hard work though Hon and that will hopefully get easier for you down the track. It is so good you have Monkey to keep you company. I had a teddy bear my psych gave me and I used to take it with me to all sessions and snuggle at night too. It made a huge difference for me to have something to focus on and hold so I totally get it. I love the idea of lavendar on his banana - I love lavendar too - it is calming for me also.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Thanks @Zoe7 just lying here watching Scooby Doo with 2 kitties on my feet. One is staring at tv the other asleep. Monkey actually came with me to a night out last week, a ladies jungle themed night so nobody thought it strange to have a stuffed monkey on the table!

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

I love the image of two kitties on your feet @cutiepiekitty My little sweetheart is outside. It is a nice evening so she may stay out there until it is time for her night biscuits. Toby is on the couch next to me. He gets lots of cuddles when I get home each day

Just had dinner so am settling in now for the evening. Watching tv - a show I recorded last night. Then I'll wash up and hope for an early night.

I love the idea of a jungle themed evening - so great you could take monkey with you

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Zoe7 we have a ladies coffee night 4 times a year with different themes. They are quite a bit of work, but they are fun,.My kitties love to snuggle up on their blankie on the end of my bed on my feet. They are a great comfort.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

2 kitties on my feet.--- awwwww soo cute @cutiepiekitty

what is their names xxx

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Shaz51 it is cutiepie and blackfella.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

That is a lovely idea @cutiepiekitty but can see it would be a lot of work - worth it in the end though hey Toby snuggles up next to me on the bed. Cat has her own room so sleeps in there most nights. I have found her occasionally curled up on the doona on the couch at night when I have got up throughout the night. She doesn't like sharing the bed with Toby - mainly because he is soooo jealous and chases her off - that is the only time he really gets his own way with her - usually she hisses at him and just keeps on doing her own thing.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Mine love to cuddle together @Zoe7 so it works well. Occasionally have a little argument but stop when I growl cause they know they will be kicked off.

22,211 - 22,220 of 27,230