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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Thanks @eth I need to try to get a couple of hours sleep as well so am going to snuggle up with Toby again and hope to doze off. Catch you later

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

I managed to doze off again for a while @Zoe7 ....

Hi @eth . Wishing you all the best with learning to drive. Some physical disabilities can’t be seen either .... and it’s so unfair when we are judged over it without empathy, especially by people who could make such a big difference to our outcomes.

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hey @eth 🙂

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Decided to soak up the sun @Zoe7

☀

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

I managed a nap as well @Faith-and-Hope @eth @MDT Not long enough but I'll take it. Slug mode for me too today F&H - not motivated to do anything so far but the footy is on soon so I expect that will keep me occupied for the afternoon.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Who is playing this arvo? @Zoe7

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

We play Port Adelaide @MDT I am certainly not expecting a win today but will watch nonetheless. If we play our best then we are a chance but it is in Adelaide and we do not play well there.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Zoe7

Love your giraffe Bella. We have 2 cane and papermache supersize birds for wildnights. Lit up they look gorgeous. They are to highlight t species that are struggling. So I can imagine. Go gently with you about your high teaching expectations. Do your best. Steadily tick off the boxes. We are here for you, if it helps, but you are an inspiration to us all too.

Sorry you are feeling jaded about your communication. The forum is a huge experiment really. There must be consequences we cannot anticipate. Enjoy this cosy day.

@Bunniekins So lovely to hear chipper good will. I missed you when you stopped posting on this thread. I can only imagine how much you struggle with kidults, but your determination is important. Hope your girl improves.

@Angels333

Warm wishes for you too. It is still delicately time. Hope your family recognises that.

@MDT

@Faith-and-Hope

@eth

Anxiety can make us hyper aware of our deficits, but you also have a lot going for you. Many skills and strengths. I hope you can continue to believe in yourself. You fought for your NDIS rights and I hope you can leave the hard yards of legal fights in the background. Enjoy this 2 years of support. I wish you the best like a beautiful magician juggling magic balls. Who knows where it will take you. You have tapped into some beautiful cultures with good souls. You inspire us all. Love your Sat soirree. Gently let some of the fear slide off your back. You dont need to keep carrying it all. Hugs.

I know a few people working in Disability, and one had to confess that I was deserving of more support. As he was also a disgruntled male, that was a big statement. Cutting up the portions of pie is always a tricky process.

I am having a home day too. My son is vacuuming. SOunds as good as him playing the piano.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @Appleblossom @Zoe7 @MDT @Faith-and-Hope @eth and everyone else ,

I didn't get into the garden today 😞 Instead I rugged up on the lounge and went to sleep. I must have needed it, feeling much better I'll get to the garden through the week hopefully.

I'm really enjoying the support I get from you guys, it's become an essential part of my life. Hugs to all xx

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Appleblossom Unfortunately I do not have the same sense of belonging I once did and that has been very hard to deal with. I am not sure if it is ever something I can fully come back from. It is through the wonderful people like yourself that are holding me here - that is something I am very grateful for. The downside however is that I do not feel I have the same voice to be able to support people or the confidence to do so - so whilst I may be at times seem to be ignoring or avoiding some it is simply that I have nothing I can add to a conversation or it is too hard for me to try to engage in a discussion. That is not something I ever thought I would be saying but it is what it is and I have no influence whatsoever to change that. The consequence for me has been a complete sense of worthlessness in a space that once gave me so much - only time will tell if that changes but for now it is only the very real connections I have with people that are keeping me here.

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