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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi all.

@Former-Member, good to hear from you, and with good things happening. Today I am living vicariously through your activity, since I have none of it happening here. Thanks for being kind about my seemingly endless tiredness. Breathing is getting better day by day, but still coughing. I understand you keeping to just a few tags these days. I do the same, and for similar reasons. I am quite introverted and, even online, it's not always easy to handle lots of people. Sometimes it's great. It depends a lot of my state of health and mind at the time.

@Appleblossom, love your accounts of working at the zoo. I related to what you said from my years of working in a counter job. I did really come to enjoy those micro-encounters with people, as you say of a superficial kind. And maybe a relief because of that in some ways. I felt during those years though that my powers of observation became honed and I could sense a lot about a person from a short interraction.

Good afternoon vibes to everyone.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Ooooh @PeppiPatty

I like planning our get togethers where everybody chips in and gets things done.

I used to help my gf hang out the washing or clean the bath before they could come and "play", but I dunno about doing another person's vacuuming. That seems OTT. I have done it when working cleaning for a bit, but its not really my thing.

We all have our different limits.

But @Former-Member @Shaz51 @Mazarita and more can come. Are boys allowed?

Oh shit its at my place.

So do I have to make the decision this time?

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

It sounds like your work at the zoo is pretty cool and varied and suit you as well @Appleblossom
Thats great!

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Thanks @outlander

The shift I never volunteer for

is sitting still in an info box!

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Ahh nope i wouldnt either id rather be doing something else too @Appleblossom

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Thank you @Former-Member. I understand.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Yeah @Appleblossom I'll do the vacuuming ok..........

Im so tired.....I betta go beddy bye xx

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good morning everyone.

Hi @CheerBear. It's possible you will be the first person up this morning, as it seems you have been on many other mornings. Thought I'd get in early with my greeting.

I've had a few hours sleep and have been awake again since about 2am. Wandering some of my paths in cyberspace. Not much happening really. Started doing some ebay 'window shopping' for xmas, adding some things to my 'watch list' for possible future reference. That's useful.

Early morning good wishes to everyone for the day ahead.

@PeppiPatty, @utopia, @outlander, @Appleblossom, @Shaz51, @Former-Member, @eth

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good morning @Mazarita ☺ Great to see you again in the morning. I'm at the coffee step today.

Seems like xmas is well and truly everywhere now - Santa arrives at the shops in less than 2 weeks and the LF are counting down the days until the tree goes up which is making me feel both excited and nervous (and stressed). Love window shopping without needing to leave chairs 😉 Is xmas a time of the year you look forward to or one of those ones that isn't so great for you?

Any plans for today?

Hope it's a good morning for you 💗

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@CheerBear, I just made myself a coffee too, we can sit on the steps together.

Xmas is not a time I look forward to, but these days it's not as painful as I used to find it. Because I've always been financially strapped, the pressure to buy gifts has been very hard some years and I've just not engaged with it at all. Sometimes I've just been too mentally unwell to engage with it. But since getting the DSP, times are not quite as desperate and gifts are a possibility that I have enjoyed doing over recent years. I only buy fairly small gifts, for a small group of people: mother, old friend in Victoria, friend here, C. That's about it. I find it a weird time of year in some ways because I have rejected Christianity in my life. But I respect and try to enjoy other's pleasure in the time.

I can understand your feelings of excitement, nervousness and stress with this time of year. It would be completely different if I had children, then I too would be more carried along with their delight.

No plans here for today again, except to get out my daily activity list that I revised recently. I want to see if I can motivate some action in myself. I'm still in a sickness doldrum, though recovering, and have been doing very little except computing and sleep.

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