FORUMS

Connect with people who understand what you are going through, seek advice and surround yourself with support. We're free, anonymous, and professionally moderated 24/7.

  • 47,612Members
  • 1,358,869Posts
  • 1,400,000Visitors
Our stories

A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

18,901 - 18,910 of 27,230

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi all who pass here this morning.

@Zoe7 @Bunniekins @outlander @Appleblossom @Adge @CheerBear @Exoplanet hoping that today is going well for all so far.

Hope you are finding good solutions re your car @CheerBear

Hope you're faring better today @Adge

I managed 1 extra nap this morning so am feeling a lot more rested than the last 2 days. When I woke up dog was standing next to the bed just quietly staring at me - so I woke up laughing. All too rare in my life.

The good news is I haven't encountered boofhead the last couple of days.

And the lovely rain overnight looking after the vegie garden for me.

And my sister arriving tomorrow night.

Won't be able to do my usual water tai chi today as I have a small split between my big toe and the one next to it. No idea how I did it. Have been using antifungal and antiseptic cream on it and now at the stage where I just want to keep it as dry as possible - it's too easy for that sort of tiny thing to become more serious e.g. if I was in the pool for 45 min today. Too much information!? Just another thing I've been worrying about the last few days.

Nice to have a slow start this morning. SW is coming at 11.30 - might do some shopping with her and drop in at a local speciality baker for some treats for sis's visit. Not sure other than that.

Hope today goes well for all. Whenever I don't get on here til after 8.30ish I seem to miss you all.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hey @eth So glad your sister will be there tomorrow - will be lovely to catch up with her.

Having a slow start to the day myself but need to get mobile, read over all the nominations and make some preliminary decisions before I head off to the meeting. Had a quick scan over most of them but they need more time to sort out. That will be my morning and early afternoon then home for a quiet late afternoon and evening.

Hope you get some nice yummies from the bakery

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hey @Zoe7 !

Sounds like a bit of a busy one for you. Hope the meeting goes well.

I still haven't caught up on one admin job that I've put off time and again for several weeks! I'm impressed with the way you stay on top of things and have even managed to take on this extra thing. I'm sure your contribution will be valued.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Thanks @eth It does seem sometimes that I am not staying on top of things - the housework gets pushed to the side regularly to help get through each day. Very much needing a big clean up here but that will have to wait until later in the week.

Sounds like you need to be in the right headspace to tackle this admin job - you will get to it when you do

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Zoe7 I seem to work better when there's a deadline, which there isn't currently for the job I refer to. But there is for domestics - I want to do a few things before sis comes. Would be nice if she at least gets the impression I am managing ok.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Don't wear yourself out in working too much before she arrives though @eth You want to have the energy to spend time with her too.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

hi @eth that's lovely your sister is coming to stay. I hope to spend some time with my sister over easter. I have similar toe situation issues at present, not sure what the deal is, can take a while to get rid of. I'm glad things are going peacefully for you at the house so far. I have volunteering tomorrow with a super negative, bully guy so just trying to spend the day for me now so I'm strong enough to deal with him tomorrow.

hi @Bunniekins sounds like you have a fun motor bike spin coming, it's nice to have something to look forward to.

hi @Adge hope your recovery is going well. is it a bit concerning that you're returning to work so soon? Is it possible to spend a bit more time off recovering?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Zoe7 Don't worry, I won't burn out on housework! No risk of that! My sw who came today has offered to help me. I said no today but might take her up on her offer tomorrow. I also want to bake a leek tart so there's something to eat after my sister is in transit through dinner time tomorrow.

@BryanaCamp hope your bully either doesn't turn up tomorrow, or holds his tongue. What sort of volunteer work do you do?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @BryanaCamp Thanks for your interest.

My Mum reckons that it's the anaesthetics that were given, for surgery.

She said that she was dopey, with no energy - for 6 weeks after her shoulder surgery.

That might be one possible cause (apart from recovery itself) - although I don't know what to do about it.

Adge

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good morning to @Adge @Mazarita @eth @BryanaCamp @Zoe7 @Exoplanet @Appleblossom @CheerBear @BryanaCamp and all who pass by on this beautiful Wednesday morning. Will be heading off for my walk in a couple of hours with neighbout have alot to tell her ....eg the pagans doing their early morning ritual who are now along my route etc. Very interesting.

Have a great day everyoen. I have included a pic of some lights on water which is reminiscent of my bay ligths 🙂

18,901 - 18,910 of 27,230