FORUMS

Connect with people who understand what you are going through, seek advice and surround yourself with support. We're free, anonymous, and professionally moderated 24/7.

  • 47,612Members
  • 1,358,869Posts
  • 1,400,000Visitors
Our stories

A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

1,671 - 1,680 of 27,230

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@eth, woohoo for timely notifications and for us both being online at the same time!

This morning, I woke as planned at 8am. Decent sleep last night, broken several times, but many times got back to sleep quickly. Still tired but have breakfasted, taken meds, washed and dressed. It's threatening rain here, not the best day to be going out.

How are you today?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Mazarita I've had a similar night and morning. Went for a walk to coffee shop and chemist earlier with bro. Now expecting support worker at 11.45 to take me to psychiatrist.

Even tho' I'm not hypomanic any more I'm having more nervousness/anxiety over little things the last few days and have noticed a fine hand tremor at these times. I had thought the tremor was fixed by a change of meds and I'm concerned that it may be returning.

Do you have plans today or is it a home day?

Great to be here at the same time for a change

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@eth, sounds good that you have already been out for a walk and will be seeing support worker and psychiatrist later in the morning. Hoping the anxiety, nervousness and tremor settles. Good that you will be able to talk about it with psychiatrist today.

It will most likely be a home day for me because of the weather. But I may end up at my friend's place at some point if the winds of chance blow that way. We never plan our get togethers any more. They are always spontaneous. If I'm at home, I have some domestic tasks listed out to do. I've started up with my 'activity list' again. Since I've been slumping a lot lately, thought it was time to dust it off and try to lift my game a little.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Mazarita how nice that you have someone in your life who you feel comfortable to be spontaneous about visiting. There's not anyone here that I have that with yet. I haven't really made friends here, just a few people who I've had one off good conversations with. 9 months here - I guess it's still early days. I miss my neighbour in Darwin, who I just stayed with, as we had that sort of friendship. But truth is I find it very hard to let anyone into my life very much. The main people I have contact with are bro and sil and occasional people who visit them.

Hoping you achieve a few things on your activity list today. It sounds like a good idea. I always have lists of things to be done, but am very good at putting things off. I mainly just do the essential tasks lately. I've even put the story writing course on hold as my creativity flow has evaporated. It was bringing a pressure to finish each week's lesson on time (before the next week's lesson was available, every Sunday). After my next trip I'll have a go at getting into it again.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@eth, there's always a phone call or text before just dropping in with my friend. But yes, I really value our friendship and it's the only one I have like that. I sympathise with your difficulty making friends in a new place. Moving somewhere new always brings a bit of culture shock like that, I think. I know what you mean about not let anyone too close. It can take me a long time to warm up to people in real life these days. I make friends fairly slowly. Trust comes with time for me.

Sounds like a good idea to take a break from the writing course while your inspiration is lower and you are in a general travelling phase of your life. I'd find it hard to concentrate on anything much in the way of projects if I was in your shoes, in between two big trips in one month.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Mazarita Sorry but it's time to get ready to go out now. I wish the support worker would confirm in advance that she will be here on time - another anxious exercise in trust.

It's been nice to catch up, albeit briefly. I hope you find some moments of joy today

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

No worries, @eth. Hope those nerves settle for you and that your day unfolds well. Catch you next time! ox

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @Former-Member. Niqua, haven't chatted with you for a little bit it seems. How are you going? Sending love, whatever the hue of things. I recently started (again) making up an 'activity plan' to help me get through my days easier. I listed changing bedding and washing used bedding for today. This is something I put off too long. But today, I did it. I've now slotted this job into my activity plan on a more regular basis. I also did the rubber duck dance today. Ah, feels so much better, and I am looking forward to crawling into those clean sheets (when I eventually get there).

Hi @eth, hope your psychiatrist appointment went well, and that the other parts of your day were okay at the least, hopefully much better. It's been an okay day here, painful in parts (neck, shoulders, crohns, etc.), happy in others (friend visit, good news about videos, getting things done on my plan, etc.). Look forward to your next message or real-time chat.

Hi everyone, hope you are all sleeping well.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @Mazarita and good morning

Glad to hear some of your day yesterday was really positive.

Just as well I texted the support worker to confirm yesterday as she had mixed up the weeks and not checked her diary - she got here just in time for us to get to the psychiatrist on time and then the psych was running late anyway. 3/4 of an hour later she saw me. It went quite well, mainly talk about sleep and mood chart and meds. I'm staying on the same regime til early December when I see her next.

I'm spending the morning chatting with the kids and catching up on washing, nothing much else planned.

Sorry to hear pain is a problem again, but happy to hear you got some good news about your videos.

Talk soon. Hope today is even better for you.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good morning, @eth.

Glad things went okay yesterday and that you reached the support worker in time for your appointment. Hope the meds issues settle quickly, long before your next psychiatrist meeting. Washing is always good to get done. I have it on my list to clean my bathroom today. Another overdue job. Will be pleased if I do it. Aside from that, I may get out of the flat somewhere if possible, though I don't know where yet. I also have a new video happening so may spend some time with that.

Thanks for the good wishes on the day ahead. Blessings on your day too.

1,671 - 1,680 of 27,230