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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi All,

I'm doing something a little stressful on 8th October....Im getting a no deposit card for 1000 and have 12 months to pay it off.....I have no other bills but I want to get some gifts for my 2 sons and for me and Mr X ........it's been years since I can do this and I want to get my sons these things.......

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @PeppiPatty

Let's see... twelve months to pay it off would translate to roughly $20 per week. Maybe if you can deposit that amount and make sure it's done every week, there's nothing to worry about? Or have automatic repayments set up so that a regular repayment amount is paid every month? Or something like that?

I have to admit I've been doing a fair bit of ebay shopping lately and my small savings amount is dropping. Having spending sprees is a bipolar trait, which I am prone to. But fortunately in a fairly small scale way on the whole. Still, it's not great seeing my little nest egg start to dwindle. I'll have to pull back a bit I think.

Wishing you the very best enjoyment and success in repayment of your loan, PP.

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hello Mazy @Mazarita 🙂

How are you today? I hope you got your computer problems sorted out and could relax and watch Reign. You'll never guess what I managed to find at the library, I would have thought there would have been some sort of copywrite law against it! I FOUND STAR TREK! Original series, 2nd season 😄 WOW, just WOW!

I'm struggling a little. I like to kid myself that it's better to know this is going to come, but I don't want it to. I don't want to be stupid, to not be able to type or spell - I don't want to be angry, but I can feel it bubbling under the surface. I can feel the thoughts beginning to scatter, dissipate, scrambling. I've been getting waves of nausea, I had a bout of that in the past, it lasted nearly a year. I don't want to do that again. I had Doctors telling me it was in my head, of course not in those words, but the words they used led me to believe it was in my head. I could not understand why I would do that to myself. It led me to try and understand emotions and thoughts in a more physical way; where I learnt the brain was also the spinal cord and central nervous system, and that's how and emotion or thought can be transferred into a physical reaction. So my logic kicks in and tells me that I should eat, whether I feel nausea or not, I am not vomiting, I should eat. I guess that's when the neuro-biological disorder kicks in, because it tells me I don't want to, why should I if I don't want to and particulary if I don't feel well!

I hope you enjoyed your wines with C 🙂 There's another problem of mine, alcohol and I don't mix - well we do . . . just terribly. When I drink I can't stop. I much prefer a natural herb . . . wish I had some of that now - I really think it helps, with the nausea, relaxing in general, calming the thoughts; softening the fall.

I know I don't have to appologize, I want to say sorry this message is a bit down. It's always you I dump my crap on. I can't tell you how much I appreciate having someone to let things out to without having to fear rejection for it, even to believe you understand a little and accept what you can't.

Love you Mazy

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi Niqua,

Awesome that you found Star Trek the original series! I hope you are watching and enjoying it tonight.

Warm and gentle, healing hugs to you for the struggle you are going through at the moment. Sometimes when I'm feeling especially flattened, I remind myself that my past experience indicates that I will come out of it after a time. It helps me sometimes to just let myself experience whatever I'm going through, no matter how messy or dysfunctional it seems, trusting that things will improve after the 'episode' is over. Another way it's been put to me by my psychiatrist and psychologist is: just sit with it. As in, try to accept whatever the feelings and experiences are. Then it's more about what will get me through a difficult time, what will help me endure it. 'Reign' is helping me at the moment.

Also, I can't remember if we've talked about breath meditation before. I do one which starts with just observing the breath, without doing anything to change it. Then I deepen the breaths to four counts in and six counts out. The slower out-breath has a physiological effect that slows and relaxes us when anxious. If I'm highly anxious, it can sometimes be impossible to do this. Sometimes I just can't muster the enthusiasm for it. But, whenever I do it, it does seem to improve my state of being, even if only for a short time. Sometimes I do it for a few minutes several times a day, just whenever I particularly notice anxiety or my body in a lot of tension. Is it possible for you to do things like this when you are struggling?

You see, I sometimes turn into Ms Fixit too, Niqua.

But it's not really that I want to fix you. You are wonderful as you are in my book. It's more that I'd like to see these things trouble you less. Anything that helps relax you seems like a good idea at this time. I hope your mind and nervous system gives you a break this time round, or at least eases up so that your landing is softer and kinder to you.

Love you too, Niqua.

@Former-Member

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hello @Mazarita, @Former-Member, @PeppiPatty, @Appleblossom, @Faith-and-Hope

Hello my scottish sister @Mazarita, how was you day today xx'

mine was very lazy today

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi my Scottish sister, @Shaz51

Lazy days here too. But I'm glad to hear any time you get to be lazy!

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

YAY for lazy days for shaz.

My son was not. He washed the car and came out with me and it was a solid 2 hours but an easy grade. My thrill is .. that he liked it.

Night Ladies @PeppiPatty @Faith-and-Hope @Former-Member @Shaz51 @Mazarita

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Goodnight, @Appleblossom. Lovely to hear some sweet news about your son just as you are heading off to dreamland. Sleep well.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

YAY for lazy days for shaz.-- Yea @Appleblossom, @Mazarita

Good night my friends xoxo

Mr shaz got BORED

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Goodnight, @Shaz51

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