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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

good night my scottish sister @Mazarita

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hello Mazy @Mazarita 🙂

I had a Star Trek marathon last night 🙂 and I'll polish off the last 2 episodes today 😄

I know I'll come out of this, as I know every time I feel it coming I'll get angry and frustrated. Star trek helps a bit.

Thank-you for trying to 'fix it'. I know you realize that's not possible and that all just seems to help I do a different breathing excercise - focusing on the the warth of the exhale and the cool of the inhale, also breathing in as much as I can trough my nose and blowing out through pursed lips like blowing on a soup spoon. They're really the only things helpful things I got from the doctors.

Today I'm just feeling flat, at least the angers gone, this bit tends to last longer - tears for no reason, I'm sure you know.

I would like to do the dishes, I didn't get to them yesterday and I've been so good with them lately. I got the bed made and the washing machine is full so I know that needs to be done - but I know not to push it right now, I'd just like to get the dishes done so they don't pile up.

It's overcast here again today, but there hasn't been any real rain, just enough of a sprinkle to dampen the ground. My tank's nearly out, I desperately need rain.

How are things going with you, I hope your brain is being gentle with you

Love you Mazy

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hello @Former-Member

I love star trek too my friend

one step at a time ,

and I've been so good with them lately, you are still amazing my friend , i have done nothing this afternoon

My husband just said are you going to sit there for the afternoon -- ammm yes until I make dinner xoxo

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi Niqua, I understand the anger and frustration too, at least to some extent. And I'd probably be a lot angrier and more frustrated than I am, if I had your experiences. Hugs coming your way.

And after tendering you my fixit advice last night, I lost it myself this morning. Some kind of brain snap on first waking. Pretty much straight away went into an angry monologue here in the main room, C at his computer and listening. About how ridiculous my life is, the day after day monotony and nothingness of everything, how I think I've improved over the past few years but really I haven't made much progress. That I'm sick of trying to 'improve'. I slept part of the day to escape the agitated feelings, and to avoid the risk of ranting more with C around. We had a spat in the midst of all this but both of us apologised quickly. Fortunately my mind and me were kinder by evening. Mood improved, but still with a shaky feeling and some nausea.

Tears for no reason. I hope you find them a physical release from tension. I find tears can do that for me. I had some today, wet my pillow. Later, as night was falling, I felt suddenly so melancholy with the steady rain outside, currawong calling. It was like the rain was crying for me and releasing me from bad feelings, and the melancholy was calming and peaceful and relaxing.

Then, later again, back to active-mind land with some video editing. I have a new project!

So good you know not to push it with housework while struggling. I haven't been pushing it either. Still, I made the bed today, after some hours. Haven't seen the rubber duck for some days though. Maybe tomorrow.

A better day to both of us tomorrow, I hope.

Streaming the love, hugs and support to you.

@Former-Member

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good Morni g Mazy, @Shaz51 , @Faith-and-Hope , @Appleblossom , @PeppiPatty

Oh Mazy, I'm sending you all kinds of hugs from gentle to great big squeezy beaer ones! I hear you about the day after day monotony and nothingness of everything! But for me, if I do get a bump in the road, soething different, exciting {which to me is the joy of fear}, or just plain good - I always 'react' afterwards. I'm almost afreaid of being happy because of the crash I know it will cause. I think that's why I retreated from everything, the only way for me to feel ok is to live a flat-line life.

I'm so glad you and C forgave quickly That's something else I can't do, hence no relationship has lasted; because in every relationship, intimate, freind or family, everyone will do something wrong. It's how those situations are dealt with and the abiliy to forgive that gets them through, and I can't.

I am feeling better today,the tears have stopped rolling, they're sitting behind my eyeballs now, tingling in my cheeks - I can sit with that feeling. I have tried just letting myself cry, I don't stop, and it ends up hurting - I end up having trouble breathing and pain in my chest. But I can sit with this saddness thats just below the surface.

I wonder if the sudden changes in emotions have something to do with the sudden changes of weather? I have had it explained that the Psorisos is on the lining of my joints and that those linings need to be very thin for osmosis to occur, the thicker it gets the harder for that procss and that's why they hurt sometimes. I wonder if that can happen to the lining of the brain?

I feel for you with the nausea, you have a very sensitive gut and I imagine you have suffered greatly with it over the years. I hope it has subsidd, mine is getting better and I have eaten. I actually wonder if it was just something I ate, I have problems with gluten {all part of the immunity thing}.

"It was like the rain was crying for me and releasing me from bad feelings, and the melancholy was calming and peaceful and relaxing." This was so beautifully written Mazy , it brought a tear to my eye I often feel the Earth is crying for us, willing us to stop the destruction that is destoying her, everythin gon her, including us.

Your new project makes me smile, and you ability to bounce-back inspires me I'm sure it will be brilliant, but sending some good luck won't hurt 😄

I did get the dishes done 🙂 That made me feel better about me. I think the little things that only affect yourself are sometimes some of the most important things 😉 Maybe the washing today? Although like you mine and my furry freinds, rubber duckies are a bit smudged and off-colour 😄

Today is another day, I can't Thank you and everybody enough, for knowing I don't face it alone

Boosting the stream of love @Mazarita

Niqua

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @Former-Member. Niqua, responding in a brief way this morning. I've been continuing to struggle over the past day and haven't had it in me to post. Just want you to know I am thinking of you and sending support, day by day, until this difficult time for you passes. Hugs and love.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good Morning my beautiful Mazy @Mazarita

I'm waving my magic wand as frantically as I can, sending healing energy, positive energy and creating a link to all that's good

I think we all look for something to blame, it's part of trying to understand - so this little Ms fixit is going to blame the weather 😉 That way I know the struggle will change. You might have to go through a storm, but the clousds will break and the sun will shine - and you will be refreshed

Love you Mazy

Thinking of you, and understanding a litte
I'm fine now Mazy, you focus on you

Niqua

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @Former-Member and @Mazarita and @Shaz51 and @Faith-and-Hope

This morning was the best and most productive part of today. Cooktop issue has turned it into a pursed lips take another big price hike and feeling yanked by the chain for money by everybody.

Have to read the manual and learn how to use my new oven. So now I have an oven and no cooktop. Yay.

Oh why cant things stay the same. All the new products are such a pain in the butt and measurements for this and that were done so they should have known the correct size, derrrr, but I saw with my own eyes the stove they sent out was definitely too small and fell through the hole.

SO now I have got a different hole .. ha ha ha ...

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hello @Appleblossom

I hate the feeling of being ripped off, particularly when you feel it's been done deliberately from the beggining of a deal!

No cooktop! So . . . roast or pie for dinner? I'm thinking that could be a very frustrating situation?

But I'm hoping you get a little excitment from learning the new oven and trying it out.

And they didn't even get the size right pppfffttt!!! Maybe you could make a little cupboard or something from the gap? Doesn't sound very fair, considering the money chain yank!?!

Niqua

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hello Mazy @Mazarita

Just thinking of you and wanted you to know. I hope your sleeping or doing something you enjoy. Hugs if your not . . . hell, hugs if you are. . . just hugs all round 🙂

Your very special to me Mazy, if there's anything I can do - just let me know 🙂

Love to you Mazy

Changing from streaming to beaming up love and positivity

Niqua

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