FORUMS

Connect with people who understand what you are going through, seek advice and surround yourself with support. We're free, anonymous, and professionally moderated 24/7.

  • 47,612Members
  • 1,358,869Posts
  • 1,400,000Visitors
Our stories

A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

15,511 - 15,520 of 27,230

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Fingers crossed the wavering net connection is kind to us today, @eth. Yes, it's been a busy time lately, even on rest days really, though not as physically or socially demanding. I've been wondering about how you are feeling about all the new activities you've been doing via the NDIS. I'm really impressed that you have been able to do the activities so consistently when they were really upping the activity from previously. When I had my Phams support worker, there were many times I cancelled due to not being able to keep up.

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

I don't mind you saying that at all @eth - it aligns with my thinking as well - there is just too much 'baggage' at that school and I think a fresh start elsewhere may be what I need. I have been at that school for a long time but circumstances now seem to be even more against me and there is very little support so weighing up my options after these last few weeks will be a priority.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Mazarita I try never to cancel as I worry about losing the supports if I do so. But I have missed a couple of times due to going to the farm, or the sw cancelling. It is good to be getting out more often but I do sometimes run out of energy before the end of the session. And really value my days at home in between. My psychologist cancelled this week as she's sick so yesterday had to fill in 5 1/2 hours with sw with no advance plans of what to do with the extra time. Went grocery shopping then to 3 different asian grocery stores to find another item for my nephew's christmas gift (we are each only giving to one person) - I'm making him a 'ramen' hamper - he loves Japanese noodle broths. Then we went and sat overlooking the beach for a while, then I ended up giving her an early mark which means I have 1/2 hour up my sleeve in case appointments ever run overtime.

What are you up to today?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

I also still need the recovery days in between activities quite often, @eth. Glad you have been able to factor these into your recovery plan. It's a great idea about each of you only getting a gift for one person at xmas. I have done nothing at all about it and, now that you mention it, it's really something I need to get onto today, via ebay. Hoping I haven't left my run to late there for posting times as people will probably not be getting gifts from me otherwise, as I can't stand shopping in malls. Sounds really nice that you are spending time at the beach a fair bit as part of your sessions. Wondering especially about how the bus transport is progressing. Slowly growing confidence in that has been a major factor in improving things for me.

Rest day today before a huge day out tomorrow. Like yesterday though, I will be doing various jobs inside the flat and on the computer and phone. What do you think you will do with your rest day?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Mazarita I just replied to your tag on the Just Checking In thread re Peppipatty's husband's decline by NDIS.

I too will be shopping on-line for somethings to be delivered to adult child and family. I feel like I've been shopping twice as often since having the support workers and I'm not into malls either.

We didn't get the bus yesterday as we would have used it to go to the psychologist who cancelled. I think I need to ask the support worker to make suggestions of activities when I'm feeling flat.

Plus I think I'm still adjusting to an increase in one of my meds, making me quite groggy some mornings.

No plans until this evening when I'm cooking for the clan. Just doing tofu burgers tonight.

@Zoe7 stay strong. Look after you as gently as you can in the meanwhile.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

How has the bus been on other occasions, @eth? Has it been more than once yet?

I had a flat week last week and stayed indoors for about six days. At times like that, I find it much harder to engage with the forum, or anything really, which is why I wasn't around much at that time, except in the very early morning, which at the moment is my optimal time of day for calm and clarity. Sounds like a good idea to have a plan for what to do for you when feeling that way. I find it so hard (often impossible) to get myself moving out of the flat when I'm like that. It wasn't a terrible week, not even really something I would call depression. Just, as you say, flat. I usually would love to be there for your dinners, but I don't like tofu, so don't feel envious about that. I'm sure it will be really delicious for your loved ones though.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@eth I am going to leave you here to chat to @Mazarita - you both have a nice conversation going and I need to do a few things. Hugs to you both

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @Zoe7, hope things are okay with you, though I know they are not easy at all. Thinking of you.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Just the one return trip so far @Mazarita.

Making the tofu into patties with other veg in them so it will be disguised a bit Maz!

I miss the days when I was up early and alert and could join in the morning raves here. But some of my meds now are slow release and effect my mornings most days. Especially when I've had 6 or 7 naps rather than 4 or 5. Last night was unusual as I had 2 x 3hr sleeps instead of the common 1 1/2 hours.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hugs to you too @Zoe7. Hoping you know it's fine to join in most chats whenever you feel like it.

15,511 - 15,520 of 27,230