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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Mazarita I love your post about your day yesterday. What a wonderful event. I would have loved it. Special.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Appleblossom I totally hear you about trauma processing in sleep - me too. At the moment my psychologist has me writing down dreams - don't manage to do it every time as I often lose the details when I wake up, but the more significant ones I am able to.

Last week the dream I had the night before my session with her was pretty full-on - and triggered some realizations during the session - light bulb moments about why some stuff happened. I also feel like they are pretty nightmareish at times too - am currently on a med that supresses adrenalin receptors so I'm not in as much of a state when I wake, but seem to be dreaming and processing more as a result.

It's good to be waking without a total panic happening before I'm even awake.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @eth, back here again after the flat inspection. Wonder if you are still within earshot of my tag, and feel like a chat.

Great to read that you are not waking in such panic as previously. Sounds good that you feel you are processing trauma in your sleep, even if nightmarish at times.

Hope your quiet day is peaceful and relaxing.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Yep still here - Hi @Mazarita how did your inspection go?

I've been clearing my inbox, catching up on newsletters and the like. And fb'ing. Did wash my dishes and put away washing at least. And wash and groom myself. So now I'm looking at a pretty empty day.

What are you up to?

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Mazarita Good morning Mazzy!!!! 🙂 I have been out and about already have done some shopping. The weather is a billion degrees!!! so will have a nap later before son 2 comes home. Hoping you have a cool and calm day. Lots of love greenpeaxxx

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@eth, the inspection went fine, though she did request one thing with cleaning the shower cubicles: she asked us to use bleach instead of the mould cleaning stuff C has bought. We already have bleach, so that's pretty easy. She also was light and easy about asking that, and I responded in kind.

We had our longest chat yet while she was here, talking mainly about medical issues. She is having a knee replacement operation this week, and also told me about her Celiac condition. I feel much better about her these days than I did in the past, when I felt very nervous when she was around, as I always have done with anyone in a position of authority over me.

Good on you for washing the dishes, putting away the washing and cleaning yourself. I've had a 'bird bath' too today (that's my close friend's term for it). I showered yesterday, so okay with that today. I have been having more showers lately, another step in a direction I want to go.

I have psychologist appointment in the afternoon, along with optometrist eye-health check, also the chemist about something happening in one corner of my mouth. I've been so keen on upping the dental hygiene lately, since my last experience with twelve fillings. It's entirely possible I've traumatised my mouth with how vigorously I've been cleaning my teeth! I think I better ease up a little on how ferociously I'm cleaning them!

Very tired now, after being up since 5am and doing final cleaning, and the very big days over the weekend. But I probably won't sleep any more until after my appointments late this afternoon.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hey @Bunniekins, I took so long drafting that last post to @eth, I missed seeing you here. I am so long winded, lol! Good on you for getting out and doing shopping already. Weather is warm here too today, and humid. About 30 degrees, not that high, but with the humidity and my general tendency to overheat at the drop a hat, it's a challenge. Lucky I have dresses that are almost not there.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good morning @Bunniekins

@Mazarita sounds like your inspection was pretty positive. Hope your appointment goes well this afternoon and you get an answer from the chemist. Yes, there is such a thing as brushing teeth too vigorously! I love the expression 'bird bath'!!! Hope you have a restful day until you have to go out.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Mazarita Oh my goodness! 'dresses that are almost not there' should we really go into that Mazzy :). I have a pair of hippy pants which I used to be able to fit into but sadly they no longer fit .... they are super cool and hopefully when I lose the weight I will be able to fit into them again. :). What are you doing today?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@eth Hi eth :D. What does 'bird bath' mean?

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