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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Appleblossom thanks for saying that about my way of sharing. I sometimes get concerned that I'm saying too much about the problems with the system, but do so in the hope that it will help others avoid similar issues. Glad to hear you are able to untangle things at times and really hoping you are able to have the help you want. I think you do a great job staying so balanced - I'm sure choir, music and volunteering at the zoo help a lot.

Hi and thanks for understanding @Sophia1. I don't think it was her fault, but it still wasn't ok. Probably the blame lies with the team leader. And my complaint will go above them to my coordinator of supports - I left a message on her phone when I was upset this morning. That should show them how it affected me.

Hope life is steadily improving for you.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Agreeing with everyone above @eth .... on all counts ..... 💜🌷

Hugs n hugs @Mazarita .....

💜💐🌷💕

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Magnificent roses @Faith-and-Hope xx

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Thanks @eth ....

Not one of mine tho. Just a found-and-liked.....

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi everyone, thanks so much for the tagged posts over the past day or so. Wonderful to read thoughtful comforting words. Still in a quiet place recovering from the couple of weeks of high anxiety and feelings of failure over the project I withdrew from. Sending love to all this morning.

@CheerBear, especially thinking of you and your person this morning.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good morning @Mazarita I hope I haven't missed you. Beautiful picture of dawn in the forest. Hoping to chat.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @CheerBear

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Morning @Mazarita and thanks for your morning thoughts. It is a beautiful picture. I hope your morning has started well ❤

Morning @eth. Very cool to read your news about your grandbaby being announced. I hope yesterday was OK for you.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Another dawn for you @Mazarita and @CheerBear When I get up earlier I always seem to be here on a morning when you both aren't!

Good morning also to @Bunniekins @Faith-and-Hope @Sophia1 @Appleblossom @Exoplanet @Shaz51 @outlander @PeppiPatty @Dadcaringalone @Teej and anyone else around today.

I'm heading for the capital tomorrow until Thursday and will be off-line so I'm hoping to catch up for chats today.

Early start after very broken sleep. Lots more rain overnight, the garden is loving it. I heard a bird I've never heard here before dawn but couldn't see it.

Hoping my washing will dry today.

Hoping today is starting gently for you all.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hey @CheerBear I was typing when you posted. Nice to see you this morning. Yesterday was quite a challenging morning (I posted about it yesterday afternoon) but the afternoon was peaceful. Had another phone call from my adult child and found out a bit more detail about little one's birth story - they had to go to hospital for 'repairs' after delivering bub at home (as planned, with midwife and doola). The delivery was fast after 1 1/2 weeks of extreme braxton hicks.

The nicest part was them saying they're excited to see me. So I'm relaxing more as I feel more included.

How is today starting off for you? Gently I hope.

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