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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A Long Rave

Morning @eth @Mazarita @Bunniekins @CheerBear @Teej @Exoplanet @Sophia1 @PeppiPatty @Appleblossom @Shaz51 and all passing through.
I hope there are some good moments in your day

In response to: A long rave

Re: A Long Rave

@saturnzoon ^^

In response to: Re: A Long Rave

Re: A Long Rave

Thank you @outlander Same to you. Hang onto the good moments, bella, espesh when the other stuff gets too much.

I have already had a good day with my son. We had a great therapy session. SO important when it is done well.

Hello All on Rave thread.

In response to: Re: A Long Rave

Re: A Long Rave

Hello Everyone 🙂

I looked up that site you gave me Mazy @Mazarita & it took me to the one I had been to, it gave me a better understanding of how the points work & I have accumulated 3 points, 1 for each ticket, I have an open license so it's safe 🙂 Thank you for thinking of me {& also Thank you to s-jay & everyone} I've calmed back down now, yesterday was just a case of everything piling up on itself I think . . . anxiety leading to panic leading to simply not coping? I've had a big day, took the car in & got the brakes fixed {& the clean underneath done}. I took my hand trolley & walked {up hill} to a nearby Aldi store & did most of my grocery shopping {not the bulk long life milk I usually get 'cause I didn't want to cart it about :)} It's a Kmart mechanic I'm going to, so I found myself wandering around Kmart towards the end of the wait - & surprise, surprise, I found something that I just couldn't leave in the shop 🙂 a memory foam pillow with a cool gel mat on it. It's starting to warm up here, not too much at night yet . . . but I know it's coming. I remember the first time I tried a memory foam pillow, it was my Mums, it made so much difference to how my body felt the next day. I received my Mums pillow when she passed away & I've gotten a couple since - wouldn't be without one now! I liked them so much, when I was able to afford one, I got a memory foam mattress topper - it's like sleeping on a giant pillow 🙂 It's wonderful 🙂 I think it makes sleeping easier, since I've surrounded myself in memory foam, I may flip & flop a bit - but I sleep through; before there didn't seem to be any position I could get in that I wouldn't end up aching to waking. {I wonder if I'm just trying to convince myself I needed that pillow? 🙂 ?} I'm tired already {which is probably a good thing} having gotten up at 5.30am to be there at 8, but I knew the earlier I got there the sooner I'd get my car back. I got the last 1500mt roll of plain wire I need for the boundary fence, popped into Bunnings & got a drip nozzle {just 1 for now, I've got to figure out to install them & the basics of how I'm going to secure the polypipe to the roof, for a fire prevention idea} & even went into a 2nd hand store & grabbed me a bargain, a pair of rubber backed curtains for my bedroom {the old ones were getting a bit too religious for me - very holey 😄 - I've even put them up already!} Lots of love to you Mazy, I hope your dreams were just plain entertaining last night.

Love to all that need or want it

In response to: Re: A Long Rave

Re: A Long Rave

Hi everyone, trying to catch up on some messages over the past few days. I have been reading and 'supporting', but I haven't had the head space to reply much.

@eth, have been thinking about you, wondering if there's any news on the arrival of the baby. Days have been pretty busy by my standards lately. Out of the flat and doing things four days in a row, including lots of walking. Also doing domestic stuff I'd usually neglect, or take much longer to get to. Then collapsing in my chair for some TV chill time in the evening. Wondering how your activities out of the cabin have been going. Look forward to chatting again when we next meet in forum time.

@Exoplanet, so glad to hear you have felt better today. One little nag from someone who is anxious about cars, even being a passenger in them: keep your eye on the speedo! Good to hear about your big day too. Your memory foam pillow and mattress topper sound really good. I have a crook neck and upper back and find latex pillows most comfortable for myself. Cool that you have the last roll of wire for the boundary fence. I think work starts on that in October? Keep up the good work with the fire prevention measures (I know you will). Lol to your holey curtains, good find with the new (second hand) rubber backed ones. I'm guessing they will help keep the heat down in summer.

@Appleblossom, a good day with your son, and great therapy session, makes me glad for you.

@outlander, thanks for your frequent good morning wishes. Great to hear your hand and wrist are much better, and that you are taking care to keep the improvements happening. Wondering if you've been doing more crochet. I did three hours of knitting today at the mental health centre (getting me out of the flat, socialising and knitting too).

@CheerBear, I think you missed me early this morning by about five minutes. Hope the day has treated you kindly.

@Sophia1, good to hear you have been enjoying gardening and that you are outside much more. Also that you are in the process of settling in the new place now.

@Bunniekins, wondering how your day has been, whether you've been keeping up with the qigong (I bet you have), and whether you have had a chance to get out on some early morning walks. Looking forward to catching the pea again soon.

@saturnzoon, how did your dental appointment go? Reading back over these past days, it seems like everyone is going to the dentist! I had a series of appointments (government dentist) earlier in the year. 12 fillings! Glad they are done though, and have stepped up my dental hygiene big time since then. Do you go to art group most weeks? What kind of things do you do there? I am part of an art group too.

@Faith-and-Hope, are you going to art classes at the moment? Wonder what kinds of things you are doing.

@s-jay, good to see you around here.

@Teej, hope the days have been treating you okay or better. Thanks again for being there the other night when I was feeling so freaked out about my online communications recently. There's still one email I sent out that is haunting me, that I sent to some people to whom I only usually talk about video. There's one line I wrote in there that is particularly coming back to me over and over: 'I despise capitalism'. Lol. Did they really need to know that? There was other personal stuff in it too that I now feel very exposed by. No reply from them to it either. This feeling of mortification shall pass, I guess, and they will probably forget about it with time.

@PeppiPatty, thanks for the tag the other day, with the joy, coffee and a big cuddle. Hugs back atcha. Hope Mr Buddha has been treating you okay. What's the latest news with his treatment?

@everyone, wishing a relaxing remainder of the evening and a good sleep tonight.

In response to: Re: A Long Rave

Re: A Long Rave

Lol @Mazarita we are so similar with the stuff that haunts us. I have an earls list of things I’ve said or written that I can still beat myself up over including one that I was very very drunk but knew I’d messed up. I said something to my friends brother which was just silly (similar to the level of your oops.....which to me doesn’t seem like an oops but anyway). To this day I struggle to look at him in the eyes and wonder if he remembers it :face_with_rolling_eyes:. I’m hoping this one for you manages to find the forgotten compartment in your mind. I think the only time I use that compartment in my brain is when I forget where I put my keys 😳😜

hugs to everyone. 💜🤗.

I have to do some things now, I’ve just been reading up on self discipline.....man have I got some work to do to build this 'brain muscle'.

In response to: Re: A Long Rave

Re: A Long Rave

Hi @Mazarita ..... 👋💕 On study break for a few more days ..... We have just started a printmaking unit, a painting unit, and a community art unit. Other subjects are like an arts business course, and an ongoing art history lesson.

In response to: Re: A Long Rave

Re: A Long Rave

Hi @eth, just came online and noticed you just 'supported' one of my posts. Here for a bit if you feel like chatting. ox

In response to: Re: A Long Rave

Re: A Long Rave

Hi @Mazarita wondering if you're around this early morning?

Just a quickie - will read back on posts now. And then try to respond to any tags individually.

Huge day yesterday and big sh&t with Mum since the night before.

No news on baby yet, but a nice phone call from my son-in-law which was lovely.

In response to: Re: A Long Rave

Re: A Long Rave

Hi @Sophia1 thanks so much for your lovely message especially about my horse. He was certainly a beauty - 17 1/2 hand cob with feet like a clydesdale and like riding a rocking horse - so smooth and graceful.

Great that you are getting stuck into your new garden. Sympathies re sore back - mine is still a problem after 2 weeks. Seeing a physio for the first time later today.

And going by Shebah ride by myself - which is still a major achievement for me.

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