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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A Long Rave

oh my goodness you poor thing! @Sophia1! haha your getting to know me quite well now because i would say something along those lines or 'dont be too hard on yourself'
yeah it was mixed with the news from the gp before (which is the pancreas thing) i went for bloods, then the actual test an just being exhausted physically/mentally.


I cant wait for the dental stuff to be over. Still waiting on the oral aurgeon to get back to me too.

How is your moving coming along? Have you been seeing the birds ans wildlife in your new area

-sorry had to edit things out

In response to: Re: A Long Rave

Re: A Long Rave

Evening @Mazarita @Sophia1 @Faith-and-Hope @s-jay @Shaz51 @outlander @Bunniekins @eth

My son didn't go to school this morning so I was unable to go to my art group.

Like you @outlander and @Sophia1 I hate needles and Dentists especially, I saw them 2 weeks ago and had 3 teeth out and a cracked one, I have another appointnent tomorrow morning and then 3 more appointments and not looking forward to any of them.

@Faith-and-Hope sorry to hear your having trouble with the sight, I haven't had any problems so far.

Hope everyone is doing ok,

In response to: Re: A Long Rave

Re: A Long Rave

Ouch @saturnzoon that doesnt sound very nice. I hope they all heal quickly!

In response to: Re: A Long Rave

Re: A Long Rave

@saturnzoon will be thinking of you re:teeth hoping you go okay. Love greenpea xxx

In response to: Re: A Long Rave

Re: A Long Rave

hello @saturnzoon

I am hoping that my story has not made you feel worse...

That would have been stressful having so much work done at one time though...

I am hoping that you are over the hardest part...

I have not met a person yet who likes going to see a dentist...

perhaps just tidying up and cleaning left to do now..

take care

In response to: Re: A Long Rave

Re: A Long Rave

@outlander

For some odd reason I only just received notification of your post about blood tests...oral surgeon and an overall summary of why you possibly fainted....very understandable...

how is your wrist..hand now?

you are probably fed up of answering these questions by now...

have you anything that you are especially looking forward to coming up this week?

or something on the horizon in the next few weeks?

I find that helps me...no matter how minor...something to grab onto with every finger and thumb...ever so tightly...

am loving being back into gardening...be it only small stuff...

I am outside so much now...such a contrast from isolating myself for so many years...I cannot believe that I have lost that time in my life...

cats are starting to enjoy coming outside with me and had a special treat tonight allowed out after dinner with dad checking in on them....they did not come when called several times...so still need to be strict with them...

you would think that I am talking about my children wouldn't you...

achieved quite a bit today...actually managed to get husband to do bending down and lifting....my putting things away...far better this way as he can never remember where anything is and always asks me anyway...

I scrubbed all of the cupboard doors in bathrooms...kitchen and laundry...they were so grimy...blech...

I do not mind our own messes to clean up...but not happy about cleaning up others...

we had to take the place quickly as previous tenants left same day...

there will be many boxes left sealed and stacked in spare bedroom...living with minimal glasses...crockery...towels...bedlinen...

made me think today about how little we actually need...

the more you have the more work in maintaining....

another lovely spring day tomorrow....

I think that moving...spring weather...gardening...back at the pool is helping keep my head just above water..

do you like gardening at all? or don't you have the time or even the opportunity?

have you been able to find time for photography or your artwork?

even if you only have half an hour...that is a good start isn't it....

take care

off to bed now...

In response to: Re: A Long Rave

Re: A Long Rave

The way you write @Sophia1 is really sweet.

My hand and wrist is much better. I still get quite abit of pain but if i am careful with what im doing minimal heavy lifting etc then its usualy ok. They said it still might take over a yr to fully heal but chances are itll be like those with arthritis with the colder months or over using it. Bugger..
The next weeks are going to be hard. Its school holidays and with mum working most days of the week that leaves me with the kids which i find really overwhelming over long amounts of time. Ill have to try and find things to do and get mum to help pay for some activities like going to the movies.
It is really great to hear how you talk of your new home and gardening and starting to enjoy life again. Our furbabies are our kids- ask anyone who owns them and they will probably give you same answer lol.
Im not much of a greenthumb myself but i love looking at others gardens esp during spring when they are all blooming.
I havent been doing much art, ive taken a liking to crochet so ive been working on that for the moment.

Goodnight @Sophia1 i hope you sleep well and enjoy your gardening tomorrow ❤

In response to: Re: A Long Rave

Re: A Long Rave

@Exoplanet thinking of you too. I know things got really tough for you earlier 💚

In response to: Re: A Long Rave

Re: A Long Rave

3am wake-break.

@Exoplanet, wanted to get back to you especially about what you are going through with the speeding tickets, financial anxiety, anxiety about your licence being withdrawn, that they have generated. I just looked up demerit points in Qld in case you needed more information about that. Here is the main info page:

https://www.qld.gov.au/transport/safety/fines/demerit/about

It states that if you are on an open licence and get more than 12 demerit points in three years, there is some sanction. From what you have said, I am guessing you would still have 3 demerit points remaining before there is any further action taken. At that point you choose either to suspend your licence for a certain period of time, or take a twelve month good behaviour bond on your licence, which you then get to keep, and are able to continue driving, over that time. I'm hoping that at least your anxiety about losing your licence might be alleviated by this information. Hugs and love for your angry and depressed feelings about it.

@CheerBear and other early morning risers: here for a bit of chat if you feel like it. Otherwise, good wishes for fresh feelings this new day.

In response to: Re: A Long Rave

Re: A Long Rave

Morming @Mazarita and everyone here. Wondering whether you're still up and around Maz but hoping for you you are sleeping instead.

👋 to everyone. Hope the morning starts wel for you all.
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