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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@outlander Not today, Bub attends five days a fortnight, can’t really afford it but it’s good for both of us at times, sometimes she says she doesn’t like it though and wants to come to work with me when I work, waiting on funds to go through from work so I am trying to do all I can to avoid spending -just to keep us entertained... She’s Watching cartoons while we wait for the tradie.

I try to avoid the park in our area and sometimes don’t feel safe there on our own.

what are you up to?

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Sophia1 good morning to you, hoping you have a good day or at least some good moments

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@outlander, yes, what did people do before computers and other media screens, lol. Just as well I still have a mobile or I would have nothing to do except meditation! Not entirely true. Just made myself a banana sandwich, went down well.

I should know better how to occupy myself with media. When I was a child we didn't even have a landline phone. Had to use a phone box up the road. But I still watched a lot of TV back then. 😛

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @Sophia1

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @Sophia1, hope this day is extra gentle for you.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

it would be good to get breaks from each other to and good for her development @Former-Member
i cant remember how old she is... can she play with playdough? my sister loves playing with playdough and keeps her entertained for hrs when shes got some of those cookie cutters and things too

im jsut watching tv atm, will need to head to work soon though for a little bit

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

lol @Mazarita
technology has taken over thats for sure! when i was at school most people would be on computer typing notes and things up but i use to use books mostly till i realise i was writing to slow compared to those using computers. i like to write better but comps are faster.
meditation can only do so much though lol, maybe finding another hobby would be good for technology free days/hrs?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Yes @outlander

Think I’ve had only three or four nights away from her within the last four years. She’s four years old.. Yeah loves play dough lol but I don’t keep it in the house anymore because it gets everywhere and I mean everywhere!!! Even if I put something down lol. She’s more into cars at the moment and dinosaurs lol and that’s ok. LEGO was a thing for a while too.

Draws quite a bit.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

oh cute @Former-Member
oh yes it is very messy. same as sand!
cars and dinosaurs are fun too lol
maybe one of those makeup doll heals would be alright? you decorate their hair and makeup?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Yes, another hobby would be good, @outlander. Motivation is often a problem, though usually not with video. My loss of interest in that is a measure of how depressed I've been. I'd like to be knitting but can't really afford the materials for it. There's art group but haven't been for about 4 weeks because of the weird thing that happened last time I went. Too long a story to explain on mobile. But I'm hoping to screw up some courage and go again this week. Other than that, I'm a bit at a loss for other hobbies.

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