FORUMS

Connect with people who understand what you are going through, seek advice and surround yourself with support. We're free, anonymous, and professionally moderated 24/7.

  • 47,612Members
  • 1,358,869Posts
  • 1,400,000Visitors
Our stories

A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

11,181 - 11,190 of 27,230

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

See I can talk and share naturally about life with all you women here, without limiting it to makeup, fashion, food, boys and nappies. It has meant that I can relate more easily to the girly females I meet in real life. Without expectation, and letting go some of my old hurts, because I now feel female enough, my way.

Thanks @eth

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

7.30am. Another long sleep since 8.30pm last night. More troubled dreams. A flared up mouth ulcer on waking. But only small signs of those head pains. I think that might be related to getting such a lot of sleep yesterday (most of the day and the night before). Have been feeling depressed (part of the reason for the huge sleeping yesterday). And, since my last video was completed, bored and restless within the confines of my life (but no motivation to start a new video yet). Without video making, my life seems empty and full of long blank spaces of time.

On a more positive note, the dental clinic rang yesterday and changed one of my appointments to today instead of later. So the first of my many fillings should be done this afternoon. Glad the extensive repairs on my mouth are about to start happening. I might even get to visit my friend again afterwards. So not such a bad day ahead.

Hi, @Appleblossom, @outlander, @eth, @CheerBear, @Bunniekins, @Exoplanet, and everyone, hope the day starts off well for all, and keeps getting better.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Mazarita Hi Mazzy 'bored with the confines of your life' yes I can relate to that but also know that is where I am safest unfortunately. Good luck with the dentist today and I hope you are well enough to see your friend afterwardsm:)xxxx.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Morning everyone ☺👋

Sorry to hear you have those depressed, restless feelings @Mazarita. Do you have another video project in mind for when you feel up to starting?

Great to hear that your teeth fixing works are beginning sooner than expected. Hoping the appointment is OK for you today.

I've been up since silly o'clock again as again I didn't take my medication last night. I'm struggling to take it with the kids around as it feels unnerving to think of being knocked out here. I need to see my GP pretty soon about it but she's on holidays and booked out for weeks :face_with_rolling_eyes: Kind of kicking myself that I didn't think to make an appointment in advance with her a few weeks ago but hopefully she'll squeeze me in when she returns from her break. Plus side is I have spent my mornings looking into all kinds of interesting things. Today it was tiny mobile DIY houses and minimalist living - it seemed so appealing in the early quiet hours on my own 😆

We're off on a bit of an adventure today somewhere fun and the little crew are excited and happy about it, and again up and moving nice and early ☺

Hope today is one with good in it for all 💗

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Mazarita@CheerBear@Appleblossom@eth@outlander and all who pass wishing all formites a wonderful Friday. Lots of love the pea xxx

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Thanks @Bunniekins 😊 Wishing you a hap-pea Friday

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Bunniekins, yes I am safest within the confines of my life too. The boredom and restlessness seems a bipolar symptom to me. I remember it all too well and for many years, when less effectively medicated. In general I hate routine, seems to sap all the life out of life. Yet routine is supposed to be 'good for us'. Dammit.

I hope your day is great, lil pea.

@CheerBear, I have other video projects in mind but the thought of starting one just makes me weary at the moment. What a pity there's no immediate appointment with the GP for you. Hope that comes up very quickly. I'd say take the meds anyway. I'm sure you would wake up if there was noise happening in the house. Many people with children go 'out like a light', I imagine, with no dangerous effect. I understand how hypervigilance might seem like a natural state though. I feel it myself to some degree. Great that you have an enjoyable adventure with the LF ahead. Hope it's a lovely day for you all.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Mazarita So true Mazzy so true .... i

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

I can understand how thinking about a new project might be making you feel that way @Mazarita. I feel it with my crochet stuff to an extent also.

I'll think about taking it anyway. It probably is that almost constant hypervigilant state that's making it extra hard to do at home. It's so foreign to me to have the edge taken off on guard mode, even in my sleep, that total switch off from it feels too much. But maybe it's not. Like routine, apparently sleep is good for us too 😉😆

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@CheerBear cute I haven't used that one yet 'hap-pea' I will have to remember it 😄 xxx

11,181 - 11,190 of 27,230