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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

😄 Oh that is so nice Mazy I am very flattered and sitting here with a huge grin on my face lol.

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Snap again, @Bunniekins, that time we posted 1 second apart! Getting closer to synchronised thinking, lol.

When we lived backing onto the national park, there were so many butcher birds around. C used to feed them by hand out the back. He also hand fed currawongs. Brave given their beaks! He is a bird whisperer.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Mazarita wow! a 'bird whisperer' what a compliment for C. Is that where you had the python? What a beautiful place to live.

Did you hear about the rat in India which ate $25,000 AUD after being caught in a ATM?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Mazarita Oh Mazy I love talking to you dearly but I am now getting pains in my shoulder and have to move. I will take a walk I think and wont be on for rest of the day due to birthday. I hope you have a lovely day. One of the highlights of getting up early is talking with Mazy 😄 xxxxx

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Just had an early breakfast, @Bunniekins. Vita brits, my staple food. Yum.

The place we had the python was before the place on the hill with the national park. That earlier place was also great for birds. It was a near a river. I remember this one time C and I were out sitting on the back porch and this little butcher bird landed on the railing so close to us. It just sat there warbling away with its complex language for about 10 straight minutes while we just sat and listened. It was like it was giving us a monologue. We both imagined it had spoken to us unconsciously.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good on you, @Bunniekins. I can be a bad influence, lol. Proud of you really that you are going for a walk.

I did hear of that rat in the ATM. What an odd story!

Enjoy the rest of the day and hope your son's birthday goes really well. ox

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @Mazarita I have just read your opening post to this forum and found it wonderful. Not that you were struggling of course, but that you had the guts to open up. I won't be reading the whole thread so I don't know how you resolved your therapy or smoking issues, but thank you for sharing. Do you mind if I respond with a snippet of my own story?

I am currently seeing a psychotherapist (can never spell this damn word!) and these days I go for the sharing relief and not with any hope that they can heal me. If anything primal therapy was the most effective but I can't afford that any more. For me - I can not heal a broken brain with a broken brain - so it was spiritual growth that saved my life and keeps me going everyday. I feel too for your struggle with cigarettes. I used to smoke but for me it was the alcohol I struggled for 25 years to give up. But I got there in the end!

Epic struggles hey what.. who would we be without them?

Ps; I live by the sea and the bird watching is pretty good around here 🙂

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @Mulgajane, good to see you again. 🙂

I am on mobile so harder to respond at length to your interesting post.

I left the therapist I was struggling with after 10 sessions. Then had another I lasted six sessions with. Now I have found a wonderful clinical psychologist who I've seen since about october last.

As with you, I find the sharing relief possibly the most important aspect of this therapy. I feel moreover that my therapist's relaxed and warm approach is healing in itself. We laugh a lot, which feels like very good medicine.

I too feel I draw some strength from a spiritual/philosophical perspective. Mine is not that easy to describe but I feel it.

I'm still struggling with smoking. I am in the process of reducing the green again. I gave up completely for six months but came back to it. The longst I've gone without it recently is three weeks. With cigarettes, I only smoke halves now, which was a suggestion by @eth on the forum one night.

So great you live near the sea, with the birdlife. I'm very near the Pacific Ocean. I love being able to see that expanse of sea, sky and horizon.

Feel free to rave here anytime. 🙂

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @eth, we are online at the same time.

I'm guessing you are reading at the moment. I'll be around until about 11am, when I need to have a shower. A friend is coming over for spontaneous visit and I'm not fit for human consumption.

Wondering how the big weekend is going. Chat soon, I hope. ox

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good morning all ... @Mazarita @Bunniekins @outlander @saturnzoon @Mulgajane (Welcome!) @Sophia1 @Shaz51 @Appleblossom @The-red-centaur and anyone else passing here this morning.

Last night I went to see the movie 'He won't get far on foot' and it's an excellent film. It's about alcoholism and disability primarily and Joaquin Phoenix was brilliant in the lead role. Sort of dark humour plus tragedy but with a positive outcome - hope I'm not saying too much. I highly recommend it.

Looking forward to catching up as I haven't been around much this weekend.

@Bunniekins I really hope your son's birthday is wonderful.

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