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Something’s not right

Son2

Son2

Hi everyone something happened last night with son2. It has been coming for awhile and no one is surprised least of all me as I have been makint excuses for months now .... one of his voices threatened me in a very violent way. Luckily he could talk the voice down and my daughter was here but nonetheless it has made me realise that son2 will have to go to a group home in the near future.

He is too big for me to handle when he gets out of control angry and the voices are at him. It just makes me sad that I will never be able to fix him. He will always have these nasty voices at him regardless of medications. He will never be totally free and will always be paranoid and thinking his family are out to get him.

It is so unfair. I could kid myself when he was younger that I could fix his problems. But it is impossible. I can't make it better and being a mum you are meant to be able to fix things for your children and I cannot. I feel a total failure...

It just hurts so much. Thinking bad thoughts tonight. Bad thoughts are surrounding me. Life shouldnt hold so much pain.

137 replies

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In response to: Son2

Re: Son2@

@Bunniekins hey little pea, a loving mum letting go of a sick child into care. But you know he will be looked after and this way, you can have more time and energy to get well yourself and help daughter. In return you can give more to son two. This is win win situation. But it is very hard for you. My mum is eighty. When I was sick. She was deteriorating. She couldn't bear to think what will happen to me when she will be gone.lol. It's easy to think dark. But we must focus on the positive we can do.

In response to: Re: Son2@

Re: Son2@

@Bunniekins have you tried the online chat for lifeline or suicide callback service? Might be nice to chat online with one of them tonight.

You're doing an amazing job, but you must not forget to look after yourself too 💕💕💕

Avocado🥑 is a great food. I can't eat it since I had my gallbladder removed. I made a Vietnamese noodle salad for dinner.

In response to: Re: Son2@

Re: Son2@

@Meowmy Hey Meowmy I can understand completely how your mother feels at 80. That motherly instinct when your child is unwell just doesnt go in fact in many ways it gets stronger. I will endeavour to think of the positivesxxx

In response to: Re: Son2@

Re: Son2@

@Molliex Hi Molliex thanks for the reminder am on to it right nowxxx:)

In response to: Re: Son2@

Re: Son2@

@Molliex Hi Molliex have just spoken with the suicide website chatline and it was super helpful. Spoke to a really nice person. and will definitely be using them again. He/she was very respectful and caring. Thank you for telling me about them I really appreciate it. Love peaxxx

In response to: Re: Son2@

Re: Son2@

I'm so glad you reached out @Bunniekins 💕💕💕 I think it's a great service, and I've always found them really helpful and non judgemental..

Sending you calm vibes for a better day today 💐💐💐🍀🍀🍀🍀

In response to: Re: Son2@

Re: Son2@

@Molliex you have a great day too Molliex :)xx

In response to: Re: Son2@

Re: Son2@

@Bunniekins Good morning,little pea. Hope you have a good day. Kindness and care to yourself.

In response to: Re: Son2@

Re: Son2@

How are you doing @Bunniekins? 🌻🌻

In response to: Re: Son2@

Re: Son2@

my super @Bunniekins

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