Sleeping too much

Well, about to jump on the shower, for work, hope there's hot water. Did a silly thing yesterday, turned the hot tap on to steam up the bath for a clean but somehow f o r g o t. and yes well, next time I went in there the room was well steamed and - no jot water left OOPSY!

Good luck with work @Former-Member.

Thanks @Former-Member, we haven't talked much lately but trust alls well between us. Work was good this morning, bumped into a couple of familiars which worked out OK, accept one - the craft guru from the U/Church I use to go to with my girl
we had a good chat about a project she was doing for kids club while looking at material to buy. But then she started to pressure mW to come help out. Apart from the fact that these women (who I broke bread with) had no time to visit or care for me after my girl died - which really hurt, I just don't think I could handle all the memories of having my girl there. How do we explain this - so I just said "think I'd find it too 'confronting" But don't think she got it because she started joking and telling me to 'face my demons' blar blar blar... So I said "I am, I'm here working, gettin out of the house, standing in front of you today instead of hiding like the last few years, haha" But even that didn't stop her. So, since she knew my girl, I said. "Actually, it would be too confronting because of the memories of J... there" Finally a little squirm, but she said "I did think that might be why... but what about how I feel - not ever being able to have children of my own? I get in there and just love it" ... Then she left insisting I think about it and how shed love me to supervise the 'older' kids for her (my girl died 13yo), hmm... Honestly! People have no idea... While I understand the sense of 'loss' one must feel a never being able to have or adopt their own children - I really don't think its the same. Its the memory triggers for me, walking on old ground where my girl played, and now with familiar faces who I have learned not to feel safe around. What memories does a Barron women have accept what she sees in others and maybe dreams of? has she breast fed or had sleepless nights, worried sick when a child has high fevers or serious illness?... Its sad, but NOT the same. Even the young 19yo I worked with in the shop today - she reminds me so much of 'my girl' who would be the same age now - I want to but haven't even had the courage to ask if she knew my girl at school. Yes, it still hurts, in an odd way I can't find words for. People have to feel it with the heart. I dont know, perhaps too many people just don't have 'heart' to share anymore. Such a broken world.





, rostered on Tues AM too.