Mental Illness and Chemical Addiction...

Substance abuse is a very interesting topic. It is said that a great number of people with mental disorders self medicate. Yes, it is true that alcohol and weed are depressants but for many people they can also offer temporary relief.

I feel that when one is well on the road to recovery one does not need as many substances in order to cope.

I feel that the problem is when people that use alcohol abusively become violent, that is always a danger and alcohol can make some people violent, no doubt about it. Alcohol related violence is a real concern in Australia and that is why NSW had introduced policies to stop people drinking after certain hours of the night. This is because the cost in terms of hospitalisations, violence and crime was excessively high but also because substance abuse increases and contributes to mental disorders.

Weed is not only a depressant but, in some people, can cause paranoia, hallucinations and even lead to schizophrenia in some rare cases. However, medical weed is also good for some chronic cases of Epilepsis and here in NSW politicians are trying to legalise it particularly because many children with epilepsy benefit from it.

Substance abuse is a problem for all people and for many countries and unfortunately alcohol is the most widely used substance. Even in my country people use alcohol abusively although, where I come from, they tend to eat jwell while using alcohol, making it better for the body. If one has to have alcohol it is important to eat and have plenty of water.

I agree with Silenus that said once, in one of our posts on BB, that sometimes a few glasses of alcohol can help a person who is feeling extremely anxious and agitated which is not a good state of mind to be in. I agree, for some people, in cerain circumstances it can be helpful.

Excessive alcohol consumption is a problem that has been part of humanity since the ancient Greek and Roman civilizations and perhaps the same can be said of wed. The nectar of the Gods 🙂

The only problem is that weed today is grown with potent chemical substances (fertilizes that are not natural) that are the major problem in terms of interfering with normal functioning of the brain. These chemicals can be very toxic and dangerous. Weed is no longer the natural substance it was once because it is illigal and because it is often grown illigally in garages as we often see on TV.

I am happy to say that today I do not need alcohol or week , I don't rely on these substances possibly because I am far advanced in my journey towards recovery..

In terms of medication, for my condition, I only take something to help me sleep when I become hypomanic, a couple of times a year for a few weeks. That is mostly to ensure that I get some good sleep. Beside that , I don't take medication.

I not only read but have also been told by many mental health professionals that for my Bipolar Disorder, especially rapid cycling, or Cyclothymia, which is a better description of my disorder (Cyclothymia is a milder kind of Bipolar Disorder, with the downside of having rapid cycles of depression and highs) anti depressants can be dangerous because, while they may help the depression, they can trigger hypomania so suddenly that they can often cause suicidal behaviour. That is why, for people like me, that cycle rapidly, from depression to hypomania, depressants are not indicated and I have read a lot on this subject.

Other medication to stabilize mood can also be dangerous for some people.

My Cyclothymia respoinds well to therapy and not to medication. I guess that the reason for this is that my disorder has a traumatic origins and is not originally biochemical but a problem of the psyche. For PTSD (post traumatic stress disorder) medication does not solve the problems. Therapy can get right to the source of the problem and this has been my case.

Anyway, just sharing the little that I know about a few things.

Starting my second day without amps(adderall) today. feeling pretty good.

I figured, when i dose myself in the morning, i only buy myself like 4-6 hours tops of contentment, then withdrawal hits in for the rest of the day. So by the time, I'm ready to dose again in the morning, it's been 24 hours since ive had a pill...To me, buying myself only 4-6 hours followed by crashing all afternoon and evening isn't worth it. So I am just gonna stick it out. Threw out my pills in the toilet, flushed, so there is no going back. plus i called my doctor and told him i was abusing them and wanted to quit, so my supply line is done. I am excited. I know what to expect. but i know for a fact it gets better after about 5 days. I'm gonna treat myself with some premium coffee everyday maybe to reward my progress and keep my eyeballs open.

I figure, once i get 90 days cleaan from amps, i can start working on my nicotine and caffeine addictions.

Very proud of myself for having the gumption to flush those pills today...

🙂

@Tyler77, big congrats on committing yourself to this by firstly telling your doctor that you have been abusing the medication and secondly flushing your supply. With you as you continue on. Sending strength your way.

@Tyler77, congratulations. Must have a lot to flush those pills away! Here's to a new beginning. 🙂

Thanks for the support @Mazarita & @JoseJones

Yes, it was difficult calling my doctor and effectively cutting off my supply and it was not easy flushing the pills, but It wasn't as hard as I thought it might be. I'm tired. I'm tired of the daily withdrawal i have to go through when using. Its a rollercoaster I have for some time really wanted to get off of. I held the pills in my hand and i realized that they would buy me 4-5 hours tops of bliss, but then the rest of the day i'd be jonesing for some more and depressed & sleepy. I've been living like that for years. I'm tired of it.

It's not gonna be a easy 3-5 days, but when im done with it...I never have to go through with it again.

In a months time, from now...I'll be living a much happier and stable life. No more radical ups and downs. No more falling asleep before 8 pm because I'm withdrawing... They say the worst of it is over at 5 days. But mild symptoms can persist for 3-4 weeks....

Yea, its gonna be rough. But I'll never have to do it again.

I'll keep you both updated.

Thanks for being there.

Sincerely,

Tyler77

Hi @Tyler77,

well done on flushing those pills down the dunny. I have never been brave enough to do that.

My problems with substance use began when I was about 16. I got drunk (for the first time) with my cousin and discovered that I absolutely loved being drunk. It way better than reality, in my opinion.

Coming from a strict family, the opportunities to get drunk were very few and far between, so I actually got through high-school relatively unscathed. I didn't know anyone who did drugs at my high school. I was probably completely naive and unaware.

I used alcohol to cope with stress during my first full-time job, which I hated. I hated the job, not the alcohol! I loved the escapism of drinking. Strangly enough, I didn't drink every night and I very rarely drank alone.

Then I met a guy who introduced me weed. At around the same time, one of my friends got very interested in popping prescription drugs. Her brother was a doctor and he supplied us with what-ever we wanted. Not only that, but through my work, I was able to get my hands on a lot of pills. Very sneaky and dishonest, I know. But I was only around 22 years of age and I thought I could do whatever I liked. Maybe I had narcissistic tendencies?

Between working shift work, taking sleeping pills and uppers, smoking weed and drinking a lot of alcohol, I began to realise I had a bit of a problem. All this was without ever officially knowing that I suffered from depression and anxiety. I repressed all my emotions as much as I possibly could and then just used substances to make me feel something.

So I gave up the perscription drugs. They scared me. I still smoked weed and drank, but not every day. I was a bit ashamed of myself in some ways. If my family had known about my drug use, they would have been horrified.

This went on for years. I never increased my use of cannabis - I was basically a social smoker. A few times I even decided to stop smoking. Eventually I did.

I gave up alcohol, weed, coffee and sugar all in one day. I felt terrible! Headaches, lethargy, nausea and general awfulness. For a while, I was able to maintain this abstinence and I actually felt better than I ever had. I had energy and my head was clear.

It wasn't until years later that I fell in a heap with depression and had to seek treatment. Before that, I can honestly say, I didn't even realise I had problems with mental illness. I was very emotionally shut down and out of touch.

Hi @Sahara

I know what you mean, by growing up in a strict home. I kinda think thats why i went to drugs and alcohol like i did, as a form of rebellion. I was into it big time in highschool, and lost out on scholarships due to it. I once met with a recruiter stoned out of my mind, reeking of pot. My self destructive tendencies knew no bounds.

I flushed the pills because i could never get enough. The pills work, they make me feel great, but then inevitably I crash. That's a rollercoaster ive been riding for years and i am just sick of it and want to get off.

I gave up alcohol 6 years ago.

I plan on giving up nicotine and caffeine eventually...but got to get past this amphetamine addiction first.

BTW tomorrow morning I'll have 72 hours clean.!!!! YAA!!! WOOHOO!!!

I'm glad to hear youve gotten clean mostly too. And are getting the help you probably always needs but just self medicated..

Sincerely,

Tyler77

hey peeps

@Tyler77 @Sahara @Silenus @JoseJones @Mazarita and any i have missed

oh boy alcohol and other drugs or AoD and mental health what a topic

thanks for starting it

some people AoD lead to MH problems others MH issues lead to AoD

two of my best friends are borderline alcoholics and occassionally take a swah rey into the full blown

one of which also fights his battles with the cheeba cheeba

my other best mate is a full blown pot head has a very bad reliance on it but it trying to cut down and or quit as we speak he will go two weeks then buy a twenty twen better than the halvies he was buying every 9 days a little while ago

my best mate mentioned earlier has no self control on the piss and on the pills X molly uppers and smackers he binges hard on them all with no quit switch

then there is me...

good ole pirate

ive ticked all the aforementioned boxes at one time or another

first started smoking cigs at 9 yes 9 not a typo

it steadily increased over the years till i stopped at 15

i had bigger fish to fry when my bipolar began to manifest

i swapped cigs for booze and began to drink at 15

wish i could say i stopped that too but fuck i still drink

and to excess at times ive blacked out twice in my life autopilot styles

at 16 i started to dabble with the green it helped alleviate my symptoms of depression and could eliminate my anxiety completely but i never got seriously into it

then at 18 i began to mess around with pills and gas

gas became a new addiction

at 19 i was finally diagnosed correctly and had also began smoking cigs again

later that year i went back to the green and hit it hard for bloody years

my life was swiftly falling apart and all that held me together was drugs

i would soar high from the bipolar and smoke green to settle me down and drink to numb it all

then id hit the pits and do gas to lift me back up id smoke one cigarette every hour i was awake and was somtimes awake for days

then i hit rock bottom

well not really the bottom never comes

you just sink deeper and deeper into addiction

hell i sunk so far i fell out the bottom of the earth and was lost in space

i gave up the gas finally and havnt touched it in years

and i mean lik sinc ei was 20 im almost 26 now

and 15 or 16 months ago i gave up the green

cold turkey

had one last hurra and smoked 200 dollars worth in a few hours and smashed my billy in the shower to say goodbye

now its just cigs and booze

not that thats really realistically any better

they are just legal cos they can be taxed

they are no safer

and no easier to give up infact i find cigs and booze the hardest

i was doing 300 dollars worth of gas over a weekend

and used to smoke a quart of green in three days

but my 20 cigs a day are damn near impossible to give up

like mentally i was ready and willing to quit the other drugs

but physically i can shake the cravings for booze and cigs

i get the effing physicals man

not mental i can hate myself and hate it all i want

but i physically need them

and that really irks me

anywhos i feel ive rambled anough for now

Ahoy @GonePirate, good to see you around the place. Your drug story is pretty epic in one so relatively young (you know I'm past my prime I think). Since we were talking about all this first on Blueboard, I have managed to quit the weed too but worry my little head off now about my 7 smokes a day. But that's also because I've developed some mysterious and troubling lung and throat issues. I'm on a waiting list to be diagnosed. These are the downsides of doing some of these things for a long time. Just hoping I haven't left my run to give up too late. Postponing that worry as much as possible until I get some clear answers. Best o' luck with kicking the last of your habits, oh seafaring one. Great that you too have joined the SANE crew.