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Friends, families and carers

Not sure what to do !!!

Not sure what to do !!!

Got a question , a problem , kind of ?? @Former-Member , @Appleblossom , @outlander , @Determined , @Faith-and-Hope , @Jacques , @PeppiPatty , @Owlunar , @Sophie1 , @Sophia1

unsure what to do as mum has been in hospital for nearly 4 weeks so far after her hip surgery and as well as having reoccurring bowel obstructions

mr shaz and my cousins think my mum is scared of going back to her house

been getting the house rearranged and sorted for her to come back home

I have been visiting her everyday and sometimes I wonder if she is developing dementain

got a transistion appt to develope a home plan for the near future , I am asking my aunty to be there with me

I sometimes think she is not ready to go home

3201 replies

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In response to: Not sure what to do !!!

Re: Not sure what to do !!!

Hugs @Shaz51 .

Please take care. You have been through a lot lately. I read you mum is not answering the phone. Is it because she's upset? Or because she cannot answer it?

In response to: Re: Not sure what to do !!!

Re: Not sure what to do !!!

Hello @tyme

When she was at home , she stopped answering the phone all together so when I sister said ring the phone next to Mum's hospital bed I knew she would not pick it up xx

In response to: Not sure what to do !!!

Re: Not sure what to do !!!

@Shaz51 Ohhh shaz big hugs. Deep breaths my friend. Sitting with you.

In response to: Re: Not sure what to do !!!

Re: Not sure what to do !!!

@Shaz51 , you are doing the best you can. It is time to look after yourself. There are people looking after mum.

Do you have a wind down routine to help you sleep tonight?

Also, please know you can phone our amazing counsellors through our Drop-in service, or use the webchat. That may release the valve a little for you 1800 187 623.

Hugs, tyme

In response to: Re: Not sure what to do !!!

Re: Not sure what to do !!!

Thanks @tyme , @Dimity

Mr shaz is just making me a cuppa xx

We had our blood test done today too

In response to: Re: Not sure what to do !!!

Re: Not sure what to do !!!

Thank you @tyme

It is just hard being mum's carer for years and then she has been in different hospitals for the last 6 weeks

Feeling like life is to carry on whatever

My husband has been at a standstill for a few weeks but now is getting Into the awing of changes things

In response to: Re: Not sure what to do !!!

Re: Not sure what to do !!!

I'm glad the drs are keeping an eye on you @Shaz51 especially when there's been so much happening for you. Hopefully your bloods will be good.

It must be hard not speaking to your mum when she's too far away to visit easily. My dad also refused to use a phone. Ì asked the nursing home if I could give him a little fax machine but they said no. Would any of the nurses be able to help her with a video call?

In response to: Re: Not sure what to do !!!

Re: Not sure what to do !!!

I will ask the nurse to give mum the phone tomorrow when I call again @Dimity

The nurses tell me the doctor will ring me with any updates

So it just feels strange to carry on with life , and you have been there too xx

In response to: Re: Not sure what to do !!!

Re: Not sure what to do !!!

I hear you @Shaz51 . You are doing what you can.

That's a good idea @Dimity @Shaz51 . Perhaps you can phone in and the nurses give mum the phone. She's probably struggling with tech in an unfamiliar environment.

In response to: Re: Not sure what to do !!!

Re: Not sure what to do !!!

Yes @Shaz51 it's just on 10 years now since Dad passed. He was 95. I still miss him sometimes. It was hard when my mother was so ill a few years earlier, I moved in and did what I could but my mental and physical health were bad at the time, and I had almost no support.

I hope Mr shaz can take you to see your mum soon, and the covid restrictions lift. Being with her you'll be able to see for yourself how she's coping and if she's still a bit confused.

Hoping tomorrow is a bit brighter for you.

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