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Exo's Exposé

Exo's Exposé

Looking for somewhere to hide in the Forum, no offense to anyone, I'm just kinda used to my own space - it feels safer to me. I often feel like I'm 'butting in' on other threads, I want to say something but it isn't 'in-line' with the current flow of conversation.

It rained here yesterday, dogs & cats weren't falling from the sky, but the grounds wet, there's puddles in my driveway & it's soooooooo sooooooo much cooler 😄 Guru Google even promises more!! After this weird wet stuff stopped dropping from above, I took the dogs for their walk, I do this almost every afternoon, but after a storm with close lightning strikes, my main purpose is to check the fence is still upright everywhere. I'm happy to announce it was all in tip-top shape 🙂 I noticed new puddle spots all the way around, I was sad that some trees had to be pushed over for the fence line, but the dip of their absence looks quite beautiful with a drop of moisture shimmering within. When I had completed the usual circuit I by-passed returning into the house-yard & wandered through to the dam. I think I may have been a little rain-drunk, I was hoping to see water in it, there wasn't any. I even went & stood in the very center of it's base, I think I was expecting to sink in mud - I didn't; but the cracks are gone . . . & they were huge. So if the Guru comes through with it's promise, there may yet be a puddle for my Staffy to play in 😉

I've decided to leave my camping trip to the beach for another week, rain wouldn't stop me - it rarely rains 24 hrs a day, but storms have - they often have devastingly strong winds that can break off & pick up reasonably heavy objects, that become dangerous ammunition. I've been emailing with the owners of this place, I'll still be in the off-peak season if I leave it another week - though I worry being so close to the Easter holiday, there's a more likely chance of more people. I keep telling myself I've just got to 'get over' that, that that would be all part of the experience - but I know I'm lying to myself. I picked this spot mainly because of the dog-friendly off-lead beach, but also because on the satelite view of Google maps I could see that there's no towns around it. It's one of the most isolated camping parks I've seen {that's within 5 hours of home, well - maybe just a little more}. It also admits it has old amenities, I saw negitive feedback about the place for those reasons - I think if you want to go to a resort . . . that's where you go - not to a place that describes itself as a rustic, old fashioned bush camping park 😉

Missing you Mazy Loads of love & support @Mazarita

1141 replies

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In response to: Exo's Exposé

Re: Exo's Exposé

Sitting with you @Exoplanet and sending you lots of hugs ❤❤

In response to: Exo's Exposé

Re: Exo's Exposé

Sending lots of love to you @Exoplanet 💗 ❤ 💛 💕 💓 💖

In response to: Re: Exo's Exposé

Re: Exo's Exposé

Gentlest of hugs @Exoplanet

In response to: Re: Exo's Exposé

Re: Exo's Exposé

Hello @Exoplanet

Today is my first day back on the forums for some time hence I have not seen your posts.

I like everyone else before me who has replied am dumbfounded at the lack of support that you most definitely should have.

Sisters! Well I have been through the same

Exoplanet; would love to know your name ( please do not reveal; just my wanting to reach you in real life so to speak)

I have not been in touch for some time so am willing to sit back in the sidelines.

I want to tell you though that I still feel the intensity of not only the unknown of your health but also your family not being there for you.

I also have known you for quite some time and when each of us was well enough we had some great shared times together.

You have and still are going through so much and I feel that there are no words that can match that "so much".

I hope that my letting you know that I truly do care; virtual or otherwise after our conversations and sharing of stories and photographs over a long period of time helps in some way.

I have loved your storytelling of containing your property for your beautiful dogs.

Your tales and adventures with the fencing.

The incredible episodes with your car and efforts to obtain parts and fix.

Ongoing repairs and maintenance about your property way above my capability.

Your resilience and resourcefulness is testament to the person you truly are.

Forget all of the negatives so called others have clouded you with, in your real life.Yes is hard to do. You can now though. You can release all of that negative energy from them.

You shine incredibly with your warrior and survival techniques.

I could not have achieved what you have to survive and create a protective environment.

Wherever you are at the moment with your health regime I am here with you whether logged in or not. As I always have been. My memory is vague. Yes we have had this conversation.

I have always been with you though Exoplanet since I can't remember when. Definitely Mazarita and the other lady (can't remember her name. Was it Eth or something similar? thread.

You were there to support me with my writing thread. We had a bit of fun there. We have travelled you and I.

I am still on the journey with you always. Virtual albeit I am here always.

How about some sunshine and sounds of flowing streams.

I found a perfect place for you but am unable to add the attachment.

Beyond my expertise.

I will see if I can find another way of saving the picture that might be accepted.

You will love it.

I cannot be here everyday Exoplanet due to my own health. This I know you will understand.

I will be back though.

I am also always with you in my way.

Please keep on writing when you can if you can.

You have people supporting and holding you up here.

Much love to you Exoplanet

I hope to be able to read where you are now.

Sophia1

In response to: Exo's Exposé

Re: Exo's Exposé

Hello @Exoplanet

How are you managing with everything that is happening for you at the moment?

You need not write about test results or health if you do not feel up to it.

If you want to talk about it please do.

Family situations are so draining.

I can understand and respect your feelings of anger.

I have been through this for some years now with my own twin.

I now refer to her as my non-twin.

This does not change the damage that she has done just temporarily helps me not connect with her at all.

How are your beautiful puppies that must be fully grown by now?

Please only respond when and if you feel up to it.

You are in my thoughts.

I wish that I could be there with you and give you a warm hug.

Listen to you or just be with you.

sending you love

Sophia1

In response to: Re: Exo's Exposé

Re: Exo's Exposé

@Exoplanet

In response to: Re: Exo's Exposé

Re: Exo's Exposé

Hello Everyone, Thank you so much for your support. @Sophia1 @outlander @Faith-and-Hope @Appleblossom @Shaz51

I've had the biopsy & they've found that it's related to the breast cancer. Not all the results had come back & they won't now until after xmas, but they are more to do with treatment. All the doctors know I'm not interested in chemo or radiation, I'm also not very interested in their hormone treatments either, I tried that with the breast & it didn't just make me cranky, it gave me rage - I'm not willing to feel like that with what time I have left. I think this means I have breast cancer, well metastasized breast cancer, . . . so it's got nothing to do with my smoking 😉 - that's a bonus! I had to do the appointment at home on my computer, as the local hospital/medical place had no spots, I was worried that if it didn't work it would be counted as my not attending, which gets you kicked off the list - but it worked. I've decided to wait until all the results are back before telling my daughter, it'll be after christmas. That's going to be difficult, she accused me of suicide last time because I didn't want treatments that can make you sick & give you discomfort {hell, they can give you cancer!}. She hasn't spoken to me in the 3 years since then, it will be difficult. But both my sisters know & there is no-one else in my life, & those 3 people have been pretty much in the background for a long time.

In response to: Re: Exo's Exposé

Re: Exo's Exposé

Sending you lots of tender hugs my friend @Exoplanet and sitting with you ❤❤❤

In response to: Re: Exo's Exposé

Re: Exo's Exposé

sending lots of love @Exoplanet gentle hugs

In response to: Re: Exo's Exposé

Re: Exo's Exposé

Dear @Exoplanet

I saw that you were on line and am hoping to catch you if you still are.

Only if you feel like responding.

I am saddened by more news of your health update.

I really am speechless.

I know and realise that you know that this insidious disease is affecting so many and the majority of us I believe would know someone impacted at some stage of our lives.

This does not help you at all.

This does not take away all of those emotions racing through you, in particular rage of some kind that I sense when I read about the insensitivity of your family members.

I feel furious myself reading what was said to you by your daughter. I know some might tell me people say things that they do not mean when they cannot deal with stuff that terrifies them or is not within their capacity to deal with.

I listen to horrific stuff from my son when he is in psychotic states which is quite frequently in the last couple of months of the year due to his life stuff.

Regardless of my love for him and empathy around his terror; I let him know that he cannot speak to me like that.

So love; fear; rage and much more do become intermingled.

Whether or not he is capable of hearing I will never know.

I can tell myself though that I respect myself and will continue to not let people verbally abuse me.

You have that right and please, please put yourself first.

I know that you are protecting her by telling her after Christmas.

This I understand as a mother myself.

This is you showing how loving a mother you are and have been. I have always recognised this in you.

You have compassion and empathy along with such drive to survive on your own.

My warrior friend, you are to me.

Life is just a question mark to me.

I have said too much.

I hope that I have not offended you in using the example with my son.

I hoped to emphasise strongly no matter how many years we hold our children; love them deeply despite their behaviours; lack of communication; we must not let them derail our self love and self respect with their uncontrolled outbursts.

Sophia1

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