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A new start (kind of)

A new start (kind of)

Hi @Shaz51 @Zoe7 @outlander @TAB @Sam3 @utopia @Faith-and-Hope @Appleblossom @oceangirl @Sans911 @Snowie @Former-Member @soul @BryanaCamp @Former-Member @Bunniekins and whoever else is there in forumland

I have tagged some of you because we are speaking lots and some others haven't been around for long. If it's too much for you then that's okay I respect that. I won't take it personally.

I have decied to start up a new thread after my psychiatrist appointment today. Off to a new start.

Simply put, he made the point that I am pressuring myself to do stuff far more quickly than what I thought I could. When this approach fails, it feeds back into the loop that was there before (the "i am not good enough", "I have limited time", "I have wasted my life" etc).

He said it was good I didn't go to hospital and avoided ending up there. This doesn't help. What does help is changing the approach etc.

It was a good appointment. I see him again in the morning and then maybe someone else next week.

So it's not entirely hopeless or lost now.

He thought that pressuring myself to go and get this visa would be the wrong decision, given my state of panic yesterday and also this morning.

He said that I need to hold off on pressuring myself. By saying "okay now that I am in Australia for a bit longer, I need to go and find a job quickly" because this is simply unhelpful. It's the wrong attitude and will only feed back into those loops.

So am I feeling more settled? Yes. Do I know what is next? No. Does this bother me? No.

I see my psychologist tomorrow afternoon. I will get something from my psychiatrist in the morning about all of this I think, which he said he can send off as part of the extension on the visa (which lasts for 2 years anyway). It's just a case of extending the timeframe for when I can receive it.

This would effect my chances of working in defence, mi6 etc but these are already off the table for me given my history anyway. The same is the case for the military and police. It does seem like some things are cancelled out because of my MH, but maybe they are things I was never keen on anyways.

That's a side issue for now.

Going to the UK - still a goal. It's a case of how I get there and WHAT I do when I get there. We have established that rocking up with no job or place to live is too chaotic. Especially based on my experience and degree background and skills. But the UK is a goal. My Psychiatrist said "Poland is always there" so I think it might be worthwhile sending them an email asking if I could be either placed on next year's list OR alternatively get some of my money back given the circumstances. Again, not my concern for now.

My concern at the moment is explaining all this to dad. My Psych spoke to my mum today too so she is in the loop. I think he will understand, he wants what is best for me. It takes some adjustment and time. But this is life and how we live it.

THanks forumites. See you a bit later today

Edit: I heard today that one of my old tutees that i helped in 2017 is working and is at uni. Doing well and studying. I joked that we should meet up for coffee and then i can get a job at the same place lol. So today has had a silver lining. This was the student who nearly quit school. But I can only take as much credit for what they achieved. Most of it was them

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In response to: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

Gday @eudemonism

In response to: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

That is great news for today @MDT I was pretty worried abut where you were sitting last night but you are right buddy - you have come so far

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

It's just a case of small steps forward is all.
Even thought of going back to Warsaw this morning. Maybe in the latter half of the year just to visit my friend but also travel Eastern Europe. I'll have some money after my new casual gig.
Anyway food for thought. @Zoe7
How's your day going?

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

Hey @outlander
Can see you there 🙈

In response to: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

That is brilliant effort this morning given you weren’t feeling great @MDT It honestly seems to me from your posts that you slog away at doing things - that effort may not always feel like it’s paying off BUT IT IS! Here are some things I try to say to myself kindly when I’m down on myself - “Something is better than nothing”, “beginning is half done”, “I am enough”. It’s good that you’re working on self-compassion. Even though I’m loved by my friends & family which no doubt you are too, we can still feel unworthy & unappealing. This is why I’m trying to believe “I’m enough, it’s enough”. I suppose what I’m trying to say is even WHEN you’re loved (romantically) you may still need to remind yourself of your genuine appeal with or without a lover in the frame. Why oh why do we find it so hard to value ourselves for who we are not just what we do or how we look??!!! Even if you don’t feel that optimistic about things @MDT I’m holding the hope for you.

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

Good on you @Sam3
Always lifting us up here on forum land 🙂
You are a legend my friend

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

Maybe, but you haven’t seen my house @MDT . I used to have fire in my belly & energy and exercise and now I feel like/actually behave like a slug! I really don’t recognise myself. Has anyone else noticed a shift like that - is it medication or the depression or is it a moot point? While I await responses I’ll start putting another basket of washing away - “something is better than nothing”!

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

Both meds and depression I would think @Sam3
I khave had this experience too

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

Hey @MDT what's happening for you this afternoon? / how has your day been?

I've been sweltering in my unit all day, up until about 40 minutes ago when the cool change come through...

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

Just been chilling out today @eudemonism
Going easy on myself. Last night was a bit of a downturn.
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