why can't I cope longer?

Thanks Greenpea, I'm ok (apart from bad headache all day).

Decidedto just pay removalist the 2k and keep most a suff. That's taken a lot of internal pressure off. How are you?
@Appleblossom, yes, the document eventually uploaded after several tries... Hmm, so looks like I'm moving house again😮

Are you protesting today?

@Former-Member

Not physically at protest, but made sign for front and watching closely and listening on 3CR etc. Friends are there.

SO glad it was peaceful protesting this weekend in our cities. I was so anxious it might go bad. We have to be careful not to follow the US.

@Former-Member

I feel he same @Appleblossom ... was concerned... so many thousands attended... so many hurting, grieving, angry souls. But fortunately not so many opportunistic troublemakers as the US Glad the high court allowed the protests, or there was bound to be clashes.

Only thing is the COVID risk now, so many in one place... time will tell.

Have you been ok? Kinda quiet. 💞

Thanks for asking @Former-Member

Maybe the protest build up has been taking my energy and my son had a covid scare. I did foetal type meditations and decades of the rosary yesterday .. a Muddled mix with my physio exercises. I dont feel the need to be too vocal here on the forum. I have said most of what I really feel I needed to say in general about the serivces and mental health issues.

I just heard my NDIS plan was renewed and am starting to think ahead. They like us to have goals and I am fine with that. I have a renewed sense of being supported and having meaning so that is good, in between me needing to take a day off gently rocking or doing whatever I need in garden etc.

With the sense of connection I have online, I am better supported than ever in my life. Dont worry about me. My feelings do fluctuate a lot ... highly labile and all that. When I first logged on to forum I was way way out of my depth. SO some things do work.

How was your day?

My day was ok. Thanks @Appleblossom - the forums can link us in with practical help, in the moment... I like that. Its hard work though for me.

Sounds like you put in some serious prayer and intercession yesterday. I believe in the power of prayer.

Is your son living with you? With his bub? How's all that going?

I'm watching conspiracy theories on 60min, back later.

We need some distraction ... @Former-Member

No my son is mostly standing on his own 2 feet but his area was hit by Covid this week, and he had symptoms and a scare, but neg result.

In some ways my improvement in circumstances is not thru a direct request online but a gradual understanding of how those who were successful at accessing support went. First off it meant regular gp visits ... then I joined a community MH org that meant I was accepted to NDIS without too much struggle. I did not know that would happen but I was lucky with timing with the NDIS. Then my OT "heard" me about my physical issues and advocated for me to have physio and listed as secondary disability.

My son got NDIS but mostly ditched it as he wants to prove himself now he is a dad. SO it really helps that I have support so I can support him when he falls off the horse. He suffered and endured a lot of things cos DHS dropped the ball in 1986 before he was born. I was promised support by "Adoptive Services" when I took on care of his older half sister as a tiny bub, but they, DHS got scared. Long story ... SO now I see it as justice and the cosmic wheel turning ...

Hi @Appleblossom haha, you said "justice in the great cosmic wheel turning" (made me google that one, wow) that's very philosophical / deep of you. Hugzz💞

Its amazing your son holds his own atm and wants to impress his own son... a tribute to you no doubt. Pray the Lord will sustain him. It would be hard for you to believe he won't fall apart, like so many in your family, but God is the great restorer. Pray those spiritual ties are broken, like you did with Covid scare. We love our kids so much.

You said:
"In some ways my improvement in circumstances is not thru a direct request online [what's that?] but understanding how those who were successful accessed support did it.
- Regular gp visits
- community MH
- luck with timing
- perceptive OT wkr
- secondry disability
> NDIS acceptance

I'm glad you found support... FINALLY!.. For you more than your boy, but I 'get' it that our Kidz keep us alive - they need to know we're still around even when they don't visit.

He suffered and

Why was your boy with DHS in 1986? Did they take his half sister away from him (you)? Nasty business all that. Where is she now? Is this the one who won't talk to you? So complicated.
You know, this is OUR TIME NOW, to stop running around for everyone else and focus on feeding our own soul more. I believe. Louise Hay says it's one of the primary lessons we have to learn on our journey on earth... to love ourself (not vanity) as the image of God. Are you familiar with Louis' writings? Jesus left the crowd to meditate and pray and recharge.
Oh my goodness, just realised the time. I haven't had brekky or pills yet and have to write a 'notice of intension to leave premesis' letter today... yikes, don't know how I'm gonna pull this off... Gotta go. You get some sunshine today 💞Its all too much, I need to just keep my head down, watch where I put my feet lol

I love that wheel. At first I thought it was just astrology but it incorporates a great deal more. I am going to print it out.

@Former-MemberYes my story is complicated. I dont want to explain too much and breach children's confidence, but I think you get it a bit.