@utopia
Good morning sweetheart *big hugs coming your way!*
I’ve just caught up on your thread – wow, you have had so much on the past few days, and I am sorry I haven’t been here for you.
Having an illness that cant be cured, but only managed is hard to come to terms with. For me I came to that realisation a while ago, but when my pdoc diagnosed me with bipolar 2 I found that difficult to get my head around, and I still feel strange saying I have it. perhaps its something I haven’t really accepted myself? I also know that rheumatoid arthritis isn’t curable but, like mental illness, it can be managed. It is frustrating though – knowing that we have a chronic illness that we have to manage with for the rest of our lives.
It sounds like you have had an overload of information luv, so it is understandable that you have so much going on in your head atm. but when our bodies or minds don’t do what we want them to do, it is very frustrating! Grrrrr!!!
For you though, there is the added resentment towards your ex employer that adds to your distress. that’s going to play on your emotions too.
Have you heard of the spoon theory? Click on this link:
https://butyoudontlooksick.com/articles/written-by-christine/the-spoon-theory/
it is written by a girl who has an autoimmune disease but I think anyone with a chronic illness, either mental or physical, can relate to it. some illnesses are ‘invisible’ illnesses – people cant see it so don’t think it is real. Only another person battling with the same illness can relate.
Yes, mums meds are the same. Cause they messed around with them at the previous hospital they didn’t want to touch them where she is now. Im glad they haven’t though. Her doctors (pdoc, medical doctor, social worker, physio, etc) will have a team meeting tomorrow to discuss progress, etc so I will touch base with them after that. Her renal function has improved a bit which is a relief.
YOU ARE AWESOME for finishing the 5km parkrun. 8am is early for that though lol!! You stuck it out and because of that I think you rock woman!!! If you haven’t exercised for a bit, 5km would have been a huge effort for you – maybe now that you have thrown yourself into exercise, maybe you can do a bit every day during the week, even just 1km and then build up from there. I think your body went into shock doing a 5km walk luv lol. Ive been walking for a long time now so 5km is a good walk for me, but you doing 5km would be like me doing 15km – bugger that for a joke! Lol! … so increase your fitness level slowly.
Your legs would feel like jelly no doubt! How are they feeling today? Im guessing you had a very good sleep last night! That’s another great thing exercise is good for – sleep!
How did you feel after your accomplished the walk? You were telling yourself you wont do it again, but I think you will.
How are you feeling today? Do you feel a little more settled with the information you were given re: your mental health? I know it will take time, and acceptance is a big thing. It is also a very hard thing but once we can accept something, we don’t struggle with it. give yourself time though.
Do you have much planned for today? I think I may have a bit more sleep – its 9.30am here. Am going to see mum today but apart from that, don’t have anything else planned so will take the day as it comes!
Look after yourself luv, look forward to hearing from you soon.
Sending big hugs your way!
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