hey @utopia
Oh no, is your son’s girlfriend okay?? Poor luv. dinner still sounded nice – I love chicken 😊
So pleased to hear you had some ‘me’ time and read your book – your book sounds interesting too.
Thanks luv, I cant even imagine how it must feel for mum with what is going on in her head atm. I saw her yesterday (hadn’t planned to) but she rang me wanting some clothes from home so I headed up there. It was nice actually as she was calm and more like herself. Im learning not to get too excited though as she fluctuates a lot from day to day.
Yeah, I stayed with mum while she had her meds cause the nurse had to attend to another patient, and they also know that when im there they don’t need to check on her as much. And stuff like staying with her while she has a shower, fixing up her bed, making sure she eats, etc. and also calming her down when she gets agitated. I can tell that some of the nurses don’t know how to handle her. and its nice spending time with her but can get exhausting.
She is still under the care of the psych’s at the hospital luv. there is a consultant psych that reviews her everyday and I speak to him when I see mum as well. also, they wouldn’t consider discharging her until she is medically clear, ie blood pressure down, uti cleared up (as that could be causing these symptoms, etc)… it’s a bit tricky but im more at ease with her being at the hospital that she is at now.
As for my sister helping me – that’s non existent. I know it would happen eventually luv. I’ll try to be brief lol … basically mum doesn’t want my sister to visit her (they don’t have the best relationship). I told this to my sister and have been relaying messages back and forth from them. my sister rang the hospital last night, spoke to mum, asked mum if she could visit her and mum said no. I can appreciate it would have hurt my sister but I had already told her the situation with mum. And at the moment she is also saying things she wouldn’t ordinarily say – she told me to pack my bags and move out the other night! Anyway, my sister rings me, is upset about the whole thing. I tried to empathise with her but was also upset she rang mum – im trying to minimise any triggers for my mum as that will delay her recovery. Anyway, conversation continued, she said she isn’t mentally or physically able to help me as she cant even look after herself atm. My sister has bipolar, as do I but I have done a lot of therapy and have supports in place to help me. my sister has suffered mental illness for a long time but hasn’t put in place things that will help her. she also has arthritis, as do i. so basically she cant do anything to help me. she is upset mum doesn’t want to see her and says “im her daughter too” … I said yes you are her daughter but your relationship with mum is very different to mine, you cant expect to flick a switch and mum to be all hunky dory about things. its just really strange luv. she said some other stuff that was directed at me, and wasn’t at all fair. Basically saying that her relationship with mum is as a result of me, as I ‘call the shots’ and am a ‘control freak’ …im like WTF? I wish I called the shots as it would make my life easier lol! Anyway, sorry, I just needed to vent. I could go on about it more but wont bore you lol …at the end of the day, she will never understand what I go through being a carer for mum. She wouldn’t last a day doing what I do. But it is easier for her to think that things are messed up between her and mum because of me, she wont take full responsibility for it.
Definitely better for you to focus on one thing at a time luv, ie conquer your alcohol first and then move onto your weight. Can I ask how long you have been sober for? I hope you are proud of yourself. and well done on losing weight because you are no longer drinking!
Haha, I understand what you mean about our bodies. My weight goes all to my booty but when I lose it, it comes off the top first. But these extra kgs I have put on are around my belly, icky so uncomfortable.
Yeah, the calmer didn’t do much – it was an anxiety med. I just took half a tablet as I didn’t want it to knock me out. Maybe I just needed to rest. And I do feel better today. The other one he prescribed me gave me a shocking headache – im not having much luck with them lol!
How has your day been so far? What have you been up to? Me, not much hehe. Got up at am, having breakfast atm, and wanted to send messages to you and outlander 😊 will have a shower now and then go see the boss (aka mum) hehe …
Oh luv, we can only take life one day at a time, hey? We are doing the best we can.
Look after yourself and have some time out for yourself, okay?
xxxx
