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AppleblossomSenior Contributor
For a while I have tried to find a thread I had started when I joined the forum that could be a "home" thread for me.
Being busy about the forum has been a coping style, where I can acknowledge all my different life experiences that had been silenced. Possibly do some good and prevent things from getting worse. Like the little boy with the finger in the dyke.
Feeling fragile
Needing Nurture
In response to: Fragile
utopiaSenior Contributor
In response to: Re: Fragile
AppleblossomSenior Contributor
@utopia
Today we were recording that Street Opera, and I was with lots more like-minded people.
My main reasons for complaining was for them to "lift their game" and "join the dots" so they get some of the consequences of premature discharge. In this case it did not save them money it costed a lot more.
In response to: Fragile
utopiaSenior Contributor
In response to: Fragile
Unknown userMember
In response to: Re: Fragile
AppleblossomSenior Contributor
Thank you @Former-Member
They are calming and grounding for me. When I have time I will do another dive into the world of art.
I have a lot of need to calm down ... calm the far .. lol ... but I am actually getting more and more anxious with physical symptoms. The recent diagnosis of Bruxism and 3 cracked teeth have effected me, more this time. I wore a mouth guard for 2 years about 10 years ago, but hoped I had managed it. Constantly clenching and unclenching. I have to face it. Nervous tics all over the place. I had hoped I had calmed down enough, but somehow the trauma burden keeps raising its ugly head.
I have a Royal Commission funded session for son&I this afternoon. I am stressing so much after last session's debacle that I need prn before i go and drive.
Chill Apple
In response to: Fragile
Unknown userMember
In response to: Fragile
outlanderSenior Contributor
In response to: Fragile
outlanderSenior Contributor
@Appleblossom how are you going?
In response to: Re: Fragile
AppleblossomSenior Contributor
@outlander Thanks for asking. I am still fragile. I have wasted a whole week, since concert on Sunday. Went to dentist today for 3 fillings. Feeling low, not intense, but only able to do the bare minimum.
I still cant see your pic, but will check later.
@Former-Member Your last post is the most beautiful warm supportive post addressing some of the things I carry. It made me feel heard. Thank you so much. Maybe I could not respond to it earlier because it is all just too big.
I had thought of doing a submission and writing, but could not bring myself to do it. I felt paralysed and would just stare at the screen. Most of my life I have forc-ed myself to do the uncomfortable hard things. Just grit teeth and do it ... yeah ... but that has its consequences ... and not just figurative.
In last 15 years I have done a great deal of rehab swimming and meditation yoga and tai chi and walking etc.
Perhaps this is part of me applying gently bently to me. I was ruthless with my own self and feelings as there was so much other need around me.
@Former-Member Dont doubt yourself. I have always appreciated you. You know the tragedy of a lot of MI within the family, and know bereavement and must have experience depression, yet still do practical and loving things. I have tried to do that too. I am just taking stock of the damage. The difference between my dreams of love and family and the way it is.
I bought 2 music stands so my son & I have one in each of our music rooms. He needs it for guitar and I need one for recorder.
He just walked in the door, as I type feeling tired. He spent day with his dad. I have to face the difficulty of a son with a serious MI. I have felt driven and guilt. I know things were not ideal. I do admire and respect my children, though there are tensions. We do have resources and abilities so I just have to keep quietly taking next step.
This forum has helped break down my isolation so much.
Kept me alive for the last 4 years.
@PeppiPatty just letting you see my "home" thread, if you are interested.
In response to: Re: Fragile
outlanderSenior Contributor
Help us push aside the stigma and discrimination surrounding complex mental health and change the way people talk about, and care for, mental illness.
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Help us push aside the stigma and discrimination surrounding complex mental health and change the way people talk about, and care for, mental illness.
SANE acknowledges the Traditional Owners of Country throughout Australia and recognises the continuing connection to lands, waters and communities. We pay our respect to Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander cultures; and to Elders past and present.
SANE values diversity. We are committed to providing a safe, culturally appropriate, and inclusive service for all people, regardless of their ethnicity, faith, disability, sexuality, or gender identity.
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