My journey

I hear you about triggers @Former-Member - they seem to be everywhere for me again - so hard to cope with.

I had to stop seeing my psychologist about a year ago because the sessions were making me really unsafe - I couldn't deal with them - so I totally get how sometimes what we need to do is also what causes us so much grief - it is that way for me now with DBT. I have my pdoc appointment afterwards though so that helps me to settle a little.

I have also been through many, many different meds - finally we seem to have the right combinations with less side effects - I am not so sure the doses are working though - I have gone downhill lately.

I do think you have had a lot going on lately @Former-Member. I know we have talked about it before but the move would be adding so much more stress onto you as well as what is happening at work. You talked about how hard it is to be made feel like you are not in control there and that you are constantly having to clean up after others - that all takes it's toll Hon.

Nah it isn't confusing @Former-Member - that is pretty much how I have felt for more than half my life. This forum has given me a little positivity back in my life but I still have serious trouble trusting anyone. I often feel like a target too and would love to point out a few things to other people - but I too 'hold my tongue' - mainly because I cannot be as nasty as they are - I don't know how those type of people can actually live with themselves. To rise above all that shows great couorage and great strength @Former-Member

I do understand wanting to do that @Former-Member I feel like that sometimes too - I suppose I turn that inward though and it ends up hurting me more.

What can you do to help distract yourself @Former-Member - have you finished packing everything you can?