My special place

Lovely to hear from you @AuntGlow 🥰😊.

I do like the shakti mat when i remember to use it lol. And you can make it "less painful" by putting on a shirt or a think fabric between etc, if that helps on "more sensitive" days 😊.

Hello @Snowie,

This is a good point. And having a good GP is amazing. I am glad you have someone you trust with your health. 💛

I hear you and I get that feeling... I wonder what might help with sharing and knowing that we can support others and you? 🥰

Honestly, just trying from a place of curiosity is such a beautiful act of self-care and love. I really encourage trying this. You might be surprised. ☺️

Hi @AuntGlow

There is a lot I could share. Numerous times I have written it down and just couldn't click on that post button. Instead it just stays buried deep inside.

I often wonder if I'm too much for others.

Growing up it was always seen but never heard.

Just another day within my head.

Thanks anyway @AuntGlow

Hey @Snowie , Want to let you know you are not "too much" for me. 😊

I've not been able to be on as much as I would like to be of late, but that's just because I have needed to prioritise some health things myself some days and also sometimes just because of life being a bit busy with things (which can be a good thing).

I understand the thoughts/feelings that "someone else needs it more than me". But you know what... maybe you are the person who needs it too? 🤔. And its not always about who needs it "more" -- sometimes there are enough staff to "go around" and meet the number of calls. 😊

I wonder if it would be an option for you to call and explained how you feel, but then also explained that you are concerned that there may be other more urgent people waiting - and let them make that decision for you? 🤔

I hear you @Snowie 💛

Trauma makes sharing, being seen, and asking for support really, really vulnerable.

You don't have to share if you're not ready, but I will keep reassuring you that you're welcome to do so - and it will always be welcomed with an open mind and heart.

Hi @AlwaysMyself

Thanks for your reply

We always need to put ourselves first. There are times when I'm not on as much too. It's good that you can recognise that and put your health at the top of the list.

I know when I do reach out for help that most of the time help is there. I think it is just taking that first step which is the hardest. Something I think is a work in progress.

I have been able to reach out for help before, just normally when I'm at that crisis point.

Anyway, I hope you are going ok and so is your health. It has been lovely to see you on the forums and especially the help that you give others. I hope you have a great day 💗

Thanks @AuntGlow

It's not that I don't want to share, it's that my brain mentally stops me.

I've had a few bad experiences, but many more very supportive ones. I think that brain automatically goes back to those bad ones.

Anyway, something I need to work on.

Least my pdoc is back at work today. A good thing.

The spasms and pain must be so overwhelming for you @GezzaP 😣

Was the chiro on Monday helpful in alleviating some discomfort? 🫶

Yes @AuntGlow the spasm are terrible. Got them last night and getting out of chair first thing this morning. Yesterday I was better and hoped I was finally improving after seeing chiro Monday. Was hoping that signalled improvement but I guess not. It has settled down a bit now. I’m ok sitting for a little while. Alternating ice and heat. Psycho called this morning. Was ok. We discussed my problem of feeling like a failure.

I get that @Snowie, and it makes sense as to why that might happen - especially if a safe space to share wasn't freely given when you were younger. I really want to validate just how hard this must be and how vulnerable it would feel to express your authentic feelings... I think the fact you have been able to share this with us is really positive. It tells me that things can shift and change over time, because you're already aware that your brain is protecting you in those moments (I hope that makes sense).

Our brains are so tricky like that, aren't they?! They are very good at highlighting the heavy, scary, or hard things... I wonder what might help you to connect to the positive experiences you have had?
That IS good. When will you chat to them next? 💛