My special place

It's really only me that she has @tyme especially for the day to day things

She sees my brother sometimes but not at my house.

I haven't had contact with my brother for about 4 years. There is a lot of history between the two of us.

Fair enough @Snowie . No point in struggling and put your MH on the line. Is your brother aware of your mum's needs?

(No need to answer if you don't feel up to it)

Thanks @creative_writer me too.

@tyme my brother knows what's happening with mum. I'm not sure he knows how it is day to day.

I know eventually I will have to communicate with him about her needs. At some point I will have to put my differences aside.

How are you today @Snowie ?

Hi @tyme

Today started of ok, got up the street and got what I needed.

Another convo with mum made it take a turn for the worse. Every time I talk with her she ends up breaking down. I know she doesn't have anyone else to talk too. I feel like her punching bag at times. Thats on top of trying to look after my own MH too.

Awww @Snowie ,

I think this is where it's important to allow yourself to just walk away if you feel you need it.

Do you feel that whatever you do, she will require the same emotional energy?

I recognise you are just starting to heal. We want to ensure you feel supported.

I guess I figure that she has no one else but me @tyme

I have suggested she see a psych or even try a help line, but she thinks both are just a waste of time and won't help. She did see a psych after my dad died once. She didn't think it helped after one session so why bother trying again.

I won't tell you what she thinks of me seeing a psych and pdoc, or my latest hospital stay 😏

I really don't think it matters what I do. She has gotten worse in the last few months therefore has gotten more emotional. She is very much the type to just blurt out everything and tell me I don't care enough just because I don't show any emotions. I'm just not that type of person. I keep everything very much inside of me.

I'm sorry, the last thing I want to do is go on about her. I feel like a broken record. But I guess I know that to 'heal' means dealing with all parts of my life.

On top of that my flashbacks have been quite strong. Whilst I have been able to control them, it still worries me how frequent they are.

Hey my dear @Snowie just read back a little bit, I’m sorry your mum continues to give your grief. Are there any available supports for her? Was thinking it would be great for her to participate in like a day program? Where she can socialize a little bit. My mum does not really have any friends. She doesn’t get out other than to the shops for essentials.

hope you have everything organised for sons birthday tonight and they aren’t too loud and rowdy.

Thanks @Bow

She came and apologised this morning. Until her next outburst. Thats about the norm.

We can't get any support until the next specialist appointment, which we are still on the waiting list for. I tried to encourage her to join a sewing group. She tried it once and then gave up 😏

My mum is about the same, gets out for essentials but that's it. She will only drive in our town and no further. Thats probably a good thing however.

I think I have everything organised for tonight. Just doing pizza's for dinner, nice and easy for me!!

Have baked a big batch of sausage rolls today. I put them in little bags with 5 in there, freeze them and then they are snacks/lunch for the kids and hubby.

Spent some quality time with D today, so that's been nice. She seems to either be at work, uni or boyfriends house most of the time.

How is your day going?