My special place

I've only had the two outpatient ECT's @lavenderhaze so not sure if they are helping or not.

When I was having 3 a week it was helpful. I live over an hour away from the hospital so if I do them often, I would have to stay in there again like last time. Thats the last thing I want.

I speak to my pdoc soon so will try and be honest with him.

Just keep using prn but I know I can't keep doing that.

Thanks @creative_writer

How is your day going?

Sorry to hear that @creative_writer

I'm sure you are not ruining anyone's Eid.

Am around for a bit if you need some company.

I could easily have a sleep @creative_writer but know if I do now then I won't sleep tonight. I think it's a combination of the prn's I had and the ECT.

Spoke to pdoc. He mentioned doing ect fortnightly. I told him it's just too hard. Would have to rely on so many other people and I can't do that. It would make me feel more useless then I already do.

He gave me some home work about researching a specific med (can't say what it is on here)

Just sitting down on the couch for now.

I'm sorry you feel that way hon. Sometimes we can't shake that coldness no matter how many layers we have on. It could be the depression too. Have you felt this way before?

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@NatureLover wrote:

@Jynx You are so wise, I so enjoy reading your wisdom 🙂

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Aww thank you, this has made me blush! You're very sweet, and it warms me to know my words are so helpful 😊 Hope your day has been spiffy for ya!

@creative_writer yeah got like 6 hours which means I'm functional haha. Sorry to hear you're feeling a bone chill, and sounds like it's an emotional one as well as physical. Wanna chat about something you're passionate about, see if we can stoke a fire in your belly?

@Snowie wish we could just get portable ECT to bring home hey! Little zaps for us all, whenever we need to hit our mental reset button. I'm sorry that it's so inaccessible and difficult to ascertain its efficacy as a result.

Whatcha doing with your wonderful self tonight darlin?

Just people are put out by it @Jynx . Hubby having to take a day of work, asking my mum or D to take S to school. Then I can't drive for the rest of the day and somehow S has to get home from school. It makes me feel useless.

And of course because I live rural, everything is a long drive.

Would be so much easier to have a portable ect machine. My pdoc actually said it would be better if you could do it at home!

Not up to a lot tonight. Just had a shower and washed my hair. Such a big task at times. It's something that makes you feel better but at the same time the motivation to have one is hard to come by. I hadn't had one for awhile so was well overdue.

I think it might be an early night tonight. I can't see that staying up will do me any good.

How is your day going?

I think I will just be in bed early @creative_writer If I'm asleep I can't do anything.

It's hard when your depression and cptsd feed of each other. It feels like they team up and knock you around.