My special place

heya @Snowie, I just wanted to check in with you today. How are you going?

Is there anyone you can reach out to to chat to about how you're feeling?

Sitting with you ❤️

Just popping to see how you are @Snowie. Hoping that you feel a little bit better today

Sending hugs

@Former-Member Tried to reach out last night, just ended of SH. Trying to stay safe today but takes so much energy.

I feel unworthy of help.

Don't know when the hospital admission will be yet.

Really hope you get in for hospital admission soon @Snowie ♥ You are most definitely worthy of help and support.

Clearly you have been struggling badly of late, and I trust this admission and medication adjustment will get things back on track. 😊

@Snowie ❤️ I'm sorry you tried to reach out last night, but it didn't stop the urges. I know for me, that kind of thing often left me feeling more alone. Not sure if it's the same for you?

And I think I know what you mean about it taking a lot of energy to stay safe. I often struggled with thinking of distractions. What kind of things are you getting up to today to create safety?

And how are you feeling about the hospital? I think I remember you saying it was on the cards a while ago, but I wasn't sure where it was up to.

❤️

PS. I recently found this app which has helped make "riding the wave" a bit easier for me. It has suggestions for activities which can fill time. It might help take some of the brain energy away?

Thanks @Emelia8 I am really hoping the med change helps me. I am not sure what will happen if it doesn't.

I think hospital is the best option @Former-Member I don't really want to go in, but I think it will be the safest option. Also my pdoc won't let me change meds if I am not admitted. I am just waiting for it to all be approved, but not sure how long that will take.

I do feel alone. I feel like I am just a burden to those around me. Giving into my thoughts feels like the pain will go away. I will have freedom from my brain, my thoughts. It always seems to come back to the feeling of relief.

I have been trying to stay distracted today. I do use the Calm Harm app and the smiling mind app too. I do find them helpful, not in stopping the urges but at least delaying them. Also have been watching the tennis today and snuggling with the dog under my weighted blanket.

oh my goodness I clicked send without saying that you don't deserve to go through this alone, and you are worthy of all the love and support in the world @Snowie

I imagine it's scary to be having about not deserving care. I've had similar ones in my time and it terrified me. It took a long time for those feelings to change. But we'll be sitting with you

Hey @Snowie I just wanted to check in with you and let you know that I am here for you and sitting with you this afternoon. Have you heard anything more about your hospital admission or what the plan might be in regard to that? ❤️

Thanks @Former-Member I knew what you meant. I feel very lonely

@amber22 the first 2 weeks are approved, it is just the third week that I haven't heard about yet. It is just now a waiting game to find out.

In all honesty I can't even look that far in front. I am struggling just to get through each day without SH.

That's okay, you only have to take one step at a time and one foot in front of the other. When are you going into the hospital for that, do you have a date yet? I am sitting with you. What are you up to this afternoon? @Snowie