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Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

This thread is a follow on (or starting over) from my previous thread Caring for a wife with borderline personality disorder – sequel to diary of wife's hospital stay, I wanted to start over and in order to leave all the trauma and negativity of last year behind me and start fresh.

Those of you who have been following our family journey will know that after a number of hospital admissions for my darling I was encouraged by my councillor to implement some boundaries (lovingly implemented guidelines, not rules to be enforced) as well as self-care for myself as what we were doing was clearly not working and my health was /still is being affected.

Well after a smoother than expected start the boundaries and self-care were forgotten with my darling having a complete melt down and further lengthy hospital admissions due to high risk of self harm and a genuine attempt to leave us. The last 6 months particularly have been quite difficult for us all. S2 particularly had a lot of issues at school during this time and is currently seeing a councillor.

The purpose of this new thread is to again document our journey of healing, working on implemented boundaries and commitment to self care. As with the previous thread this is so that I can have a visual plan for myself with some accountability to follow through with plans in place and in the hope that it may help others in similar situations to ours. And so that I can track our progress. This was especially helpful in the last thread leading up to Christmas when I was feeling down about our current position to review what I had written and see just how far we have come.

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In response to: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

After convincing his councillor yesterday that he was doing well and on top of things I got an email from one of S2s teachers today as he had been sent out of class and to detention for being disrespectful and disruptive.

Feel bad but I forwarded it to darling and told her to deal with it as I don't have the capacity right now. And it dosent matter what I say she will take the childs side and tell me I am being unreasonable.

In response to: Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Went for a foot massage this afternoon as some self care.

Have been contemplating it for a couple months as my feet are always tense and sore. Wow what a difference.

Other parts of me are aching now though lol.

Should not surprise me... chiropractor told me a long time ago it was the tension in my neck and shoulders that was the source of most of my problems. Will have to go in for a neck and shoulder massage next. And find a new chiropractor based on what I was told this afternoon.

In response to: Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Me trying to study

https://images.app.goo.gl/3AzZFS7ggpoWiEZW6

In response to: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

How did you get on today @Determined

In response to: Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Got through today @Former-Member

Will be happy when tomorrows exam is over. (worth 30% of overall marks)

It feels like I am getting more and more tired. hoping after that is out of the way I may be more relaxed and rested. BIke ride on the agenda for Wednesday if I am not too tired.

In response to: Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Gentle reminder @Determined boundaries for exam day.

Been thinking especially of you, emotions will be raw for a while.

In response to: Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Thanks @Former-Member appreciate your thoughts.

In response to: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

@Determined Firstly, well done, for admitting and acknowledging what maybe you would normally not have responded in your email, takes courage, honesty etc to do so. Sounds like you love your job, and it's good for you, so hang in there. If you feel you need a little time off, ask, it sounds like they may be open to it... And end of term isn't that far away either. Go easy on yourself. 😊

In response to: Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

@Determined, sitting with you

In response to: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Hi Determined, wondering how you got on today.

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