rough time

Hi @outlander

I think you did a great job expressing yourself here and how you are feeling, what you are struggling with and it's good to see the support you are getting here.

The way I read your post it does sound like you are taking on the worries of the world too much, worrying about those around you - and as you said strangers too (please correct me if I read it wrong). I was doing this with my daughter and I do understand the anxiety and distress this can bring. It can make us sick if it gets out of hand.

That is why people in caring roles such as psychologists, psychiatrists etc are trained to watch for these signs of when listening to or witnessing the mental health issues and struggles/pain of others starts effecting them negatively. That's when we need to take a step back. That does not mean we don't care, just means we are human - we just need a break and start to be carefree and happy ourselves lest we come undone. That is what I am having to do with my daughter.

I also need to keep that balance where I work as I help a lot of people in distress - but there I am able to come home and detach. If we are surrounded in our personal life and online with alot negativity and/or worry constantly it will have a detrimental impact. It's similar to listening to the news 24/7 - listening to all the bad things in the world. Soon we start to see it everywhere as it dominates our thoughts as we are "constantly exposed to it" - and our minds overact seeing danger and darkness, despair - the worst case scenario everywhere. Negatory feeds negativity. That can lead to a breakdown so it is so important to give ours minds a break. And start being happy doing those things that give us reprieve and pleasure and being around those who appreciate us and enjoy life too. There's the balance.

I did that for myself today - went out to a favourite place of mine with hubby on the ocean (where we are building) and just forgot all my worries and that of the world. I went there feeling strained - came out feeling uplifted and refreshed. This would be good for you too - doing what uplifts you and being around those who do for abit. Then we come back stronger to take on what the world throws at us without becoming overhwhelmed. Do what makes you happy for abit instead of worrying about everyone else.

Its time to focus on you @outlander, and that of which is good for you for now. Time for self nurturing lest you go down. Just by doing our bit every now by being kind to those who come our way is more than enough to help them - and a good balance. Sending you positive vibes and all those who pass by.

I have been on the phone lil Sis @outlander and it didn't sound submissive at all sweetie. And you don't have to know what you need in order to ask for support and help. Why don't you ring the foundation again today or next week, ask them what support services are in your area? You don't necessarily need to be attached to the local community mh team either if you don't want to. Like I have said before, I think a peer support worker would be fantastic for you. These people come from services NOT generally localised mh services. Just ask the foundation if they can help you locate a service in your area. Or your GP should be able to do the same. Even if she tells you she doesn't think you need it, insist on being referred or given some contact details at least. This is your life, and you matter. You have the right as a patient to determine what your needs are. Support workers are really good as well in advocating for you, helping you with forms or going to appointments with you if you need support. And they are there to talk things over, they help with setting recovery goals, all sorts of things. This would be a good start for you lil Sis

@outlander I'm going to send you an email.

Be gentle with yourself. Lots of support here sitting with you.

Take care 🙂

Ohhhh @outlander sitting with you and sending you lots of tender hugs my sister

@outlanderI am sorry hun you are feeling this way

@outlander I have had the exact same wording in my feelings but my MH support team is standing by me and saying I dont waste resources.

I am beginning to realise all the guilt trips from others that I internalised.

Human society does not do supportive villages as much ... but these new organisations are ways to face the interdependence we all have ... as a species.

Its natural ... to reach out when in need ... and its also natural to give a hand to others ... you do both ... its balanced Bella. Take what you need.