rough time

Thank you @Former-Member

my supports are my gp on monday, psych team on wednesday and a phone call from the psych team on friday. I also know I have here, sane HC, and will be doing a lot of self caring thats for sure. Tuesday will be overwhelming but its my sisters birthday so will be attending that and will try my best to be ok about it.

Thank you @Shaz51 I missed you too and gratefully accepting your hugs and sending some in return

thank you @Bunniekins

I didnt know I was going to take time away from here, I didnt even know if I wanted to make it through the night at that stage. Thank you for being here too

thank you @Former-Member

I didnt want to withdraw I guess it just panned out that way. It couldve ended a lot worse so wherever that inner tug come from I am grateful for. I doubt they will help me with th sleeping troubles at all. Im already on what she gave me before and it doesnt help at all. That was a main reason I think I just stopped fighting. It really did feel like after that gp on monday it really just broke me more than what I already was. While I was there yes they were beautiful people. I got a few looks from a few but at that point I really just didnt care. There was a nurse that reminded me of @Sans911 actually. A middle aged woman who was really kind and genlte but had that firmness about her.

Ill add that to the list of calligraphy quotes for you, though im really not sure what my strengths are here. I feel like an idiot again, nothing new.

Ohh @Bunniekins, @outlander, i am going to read my magazine and talk to all my amzing friends here on the forum

hi @outlander

@

@outlanderyou are NOT an idiot (yes that is shouty!) Far from it.

Your strengths are; caring, kind, compassionate, selfless, courageous and they are to name a few. I could keep going!!

Hi @outlander

Lovely to see you here.

Take Care

SP

lol I actually have more to say than hi @outlander

i bumped enter before i had even finished

what you wrote about struck a chord with me because it reminded me of the difficult time i had in 2016 when i was at hospital. Even if it was only one night, it was easily my darkest hour.

I think what i get a sense of in your writing is a maturity.. you seem to be growing despite this stuff going on. It may not seem like it at your end but I can see it in your writing. I was told the same thing at that point in my life about my writing showing that i had matured. It's hard to believe but it is certainly happening let me tell you. I know those signs.

Glad to hear you are in a moderately better place now though @outlander

Sometimes taking a break from the forums can actually work like magic and I know that from experience too. Even today I had to break from them in order to go to the damn shops to buy groceries seeing as i am now in charge of what happens in the house (whenever rest of family are away with dad's work). It was really hard, but then in the end I thought "bugger it need to do it or else it won't do itself". I'm not saying you are at that sort of point now, but in time you will be. Self awareness can be an ally as much as it can an enemy in the battles we do with our mental health.

If the responses and care that people show you on here are anything to go by then it be a safe bet to say that people really like you on here haha. I am one of them. You are a very kind hearted soul and I hope you remember this. Hopefully one day you will extend this to yourself.

It's okay that you got to a point where you needed hospital. It's okay that they gave you sleep meds (i bloody love sleep meds because i sleep like a baby lol). It's okay that you felt bad when you went past that place with the dog attack. Lately I have been having bad dreams with people from my childhood in them.. particularly that man i mentioned in my other thread just being there.. it's weird but I think the human mind is weird anyway.. as it tried to interpret reality and everything we see. So what I am saying is that your response to driving past those places is a totally logical one. Your mind is trying to make sense of the event and that place it took place. We are pattern seeking creatures after all.

Anyway, before this turns into a divulgence on the interpretation of dreams I just want to say welcome back and glad to have you back. You are getting there my friend, it just takes patience and time. Also a nice touch of humour too.

- @MDT

thank you @SleepyPanda

enjoy @Shaz51 🙂

will be back soon guys, getting a headache and want to catch it early again thank you

@MDT@Former-Member@Bunniekins@Sans911

i deserved that @Sans911

yeah i know i shouldve stayed longer but i was also worried about pop. i cant function in hospital knowing of the things hes said when i was in there last time and know he isnt at his best either. these arrangements in place give me the support but keeping me out of there. i called the ambulance myself. i knew it was really getting out of my hands esp after thursday arvo when i felt myself drop further than wednesday. i didnt want to go there so continued to hold off and went in on friday morning. yes okish under the circumstances, just as the rest of us are i suppose. i dont want to loose you either, you mean alot to me as o a few others here too.

i dont know what im really suppose to do now. i was running from the support and really lost faith in our mh system. but if i dont do as they say then its back to hospital so i will have to continue doing whatever they tell me to do i suppose.