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Night Shift

MazaritaSenior Contributor23 Sept 2015, 4:13 am AEST

Night Shift

Since I am awake at 4am I thought I'd start this thread for those of us who have trouble sleeping and might find it helpful to have a place to go to chat. Whatever gets you through the night is alright.

To get the ball rolling, I'll just say that I enjoyed being part of the Topic Tuesday discussion tonight. I wish it was possible for these events to be weekly rather than monthly. Either way, thanks SANE and all the people I've met on here over recent months.

Edited June 2016 and February 2017: Night Shift is now open 24 hours a day. To join in, just click through to the last page of the thread at the top right of this post to get to the latest message.

Edited April 2017 and June 2017: For the sake of better communications between members here, I am adding that this thread is meant to be a caring, kind and gentle place of sharing. Humour is welcome, as long as its not unkindly directed towards other members. Hope your time in this chat thread is rewarding.

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In response to: Night Shift

Unknown userMember01 Dec 2015, 11:58 pm AEDT

Re: Night Shift

Sorry for not responding to everyone. Great news about the support worker @PeppiPatty. Glad I helped you with the putting away the folding @Mazarita.... I'm really tired now... I've been up since 6:30 (awake before then) & I didn't nap & I exercised - how is that for sleep hygeine! I might just do nothing tomorrow - sounds appealing.... *fingers crossed* the anxiety doesn't keep me up till 1am. Hope everyone has a restful sleep.

Kind thoughts,

In response to: Night Shift

MazaritaSenior Contributor02 Dec 2015, 12:37 am AEDT

Re: Night Shift

@Former-Member Sorry if my 'bar too high' was not really the best thing to say... I mean well but sometimes I can be a bit misguided I think. But perhaps this is just my paranoia speaking. I really hope you find the help you want and need. Thank you for being here today too.

In response to: Night Shift

AppleblossomSenior Contributor02 Dec 2015, 1:01 am AEDT

Re: Night Shift

Tbh I would have gone nuts if (sorry crackers) if I had to report to someone about my sleep hygeine. Isnt that a bit intrusive? A few months ago I let it go and was up through the night a bit ... but it was a whole lot better than lieing in bed not sleeping and struggling with an overactive mind.

My anxiety for getting up at 7am one day per week and getting into church was extreme. Just to prove it myself ??? I have relaxed a bit better in this year that I have chosen not to do that. I am singing with better singers and a lot less stress and travel and practise ... My SI has been less this year... because I have been fighting myself less.

Accepting that for a lot of my life my hours and productivity have been late in the day ... working 3-5 nights a week etc ... peak concentration required for running choirs etc.

What has being a morning person got to do with being a better person .. its fine if it works.

I will get to bed soon ... but it was more important for me to be understanding ... therefore know what it was like .. than to be the sleep hygeine monitor.

@Former-Member I am surprised you dont have privacy with your psychiatrist. I always respect son's privacy and respected my siblings and my exhusb relationships with MH providers . It is good for there to be some flow of information with a carer ... but not necessary all the time ... even on the Carer's Forum many of them dont get in with the doctors of their loved one.

You can set a limit. A partner isnt objective anyway.. its a personal relationship! Maybe he can come in for 10 mins at the end or for one out of every 5 sessions ... or see if you can get a psychologist to help you work out things.. and keep it strictly to yourself.

I find a lot of people are insistent in talking about money matters ... they see it as a reality checking .. and maybe sometimes having a dig ... I find it best to acknowledge the topic and then move on ... find a way to directly mention money matters in a minimal way with her .. without being too defensive about living there ... maybe you can give her board from your pension .. or gently remind her if you do already.

She will be getting some capital gains ... its a balance ... when I stayed on a dairy farm they always had jobs for me to do.

Take care and go gently with yourself

In response to: Night Shift

PeppiPattySenior Contributor02 Dec 2015, 1:24 am AEDT

Re: Night Shift

Omg
Dearest @Former-Member
I was so shocked with what you are dealing with I went into the kitchen trembling a little and ate peanut paste with a spoon.
I think I know how to answer without not wanting to hop on a plane and go to you and give you a very big hug.
Can I be angry for you for 5 minutes. Can I yell at this so called relationship counsellor for you ?

Okay I've settled down. I'm a reasonably inelligent person; not too clever who has read her books, done her studies ..... At least I'm kind.

1; your therapist is doing something called 'projective identification to you. It's what therapists do when they are not being sufficiently open, non judgemental and well supervised ( de briefed) even when I was vollunteering on Salvation Army Care Line Phone Lines, I saw a debriefer, a Psychotherapist. Who would listen to me about the people who would ring so I wouldn't give them my own advise about my own problems but I would stay focused on what they were dealing with. I don't have any really good books on me right now : they are all gone but I think if you look up Melanie Klien ( my hero) or Donald Laing ...... You can get a good definition. When someone says ..... They are tired to me; in a therapy session I immediately think that this so called therapist is not 'read up.' That this therapist is not acting professionally. and I've had enough therapy to support your family and my family ( and I still go to it and need it)

This is going to be a long message.
If you can, do you think you can call this organisation or write. Letter to ...... An administrator or .........
And write ' I am being taken advantage of.
My good nature is been taken advantage of.
This therapist is defining me as someone very ill, this is normal for me and I'm seeing this therapist for positive reasons not to hear his / negative responses only to me.

Can you do it ?

Just a tic. I'm going to make a cup of tea and calm down. Yes this had brought back memories of a very bad therapist I saw many years ago. Good good story after many years as well ...........

In response to: Night Shift

PeppiPattySenior Contributor02 Dec 2015, 1:41 am AEDT

Re: Night Shift

I'm reading the other messages which I will touch on:
I like @Appleblossom writing about it being intrusive;
My husband was diagnosed at 19 with Chronic paranoid schizophrenia. We went to high school together: we know each other very well. I married ..... He had a sad life; we married about 3 4 years ago but broke up for 2 years ....... It was actually 1:5 years and we remedy again and we are re starting ........

I would never ever go to his Psychiatrist's appuontments. He even has nurses who visit him every fortnight for his depot needle, I'm not there.... He loves seeing his nurses. They take him out and get a coffee with him.

I am not allowed to ' talk,' about my husband but I'm allowed to talk about me. I've had these people come up to me saying how amazing I am ( ??)
How strong I am (??)
Hang on ? I might have woman chosen him but ...... ??????

I think you might need to write anot to your Psychiatrist and just say : please understand I don't want any problems but I'm feeling stressed with .......... Coming into my appointments with me. Can you ask him to wait...... I am your client and I'm not feeling strong enough to tell him myself.
As someone who suffers times of mental ill health I need you to step in for me.

You need him to say that my client is not a ' exciting thrill,' for you to look at and think about. She is a normal breathing human being.

Delete the last paragraph. Please laugh with me. That was my stuff.

In response to: Night Shift

PeppiPattySenior Contributor02 Dec 2015, 1:46 am AEDT

Re: Night Shift

I have warned @aButterdly that I was going to write a lot but I must write to @Appleblossom not to open her son's blinds so often.
Jeepers. Her friend has got an award,

In response to: Night Shift

PeppiPattySenior Contributor02 Dec 2015, 2:14 am AEDT

Re: Night Shift

Jeepers @Former-Member
You and that silly unprofessional Social Worker. When my darling hub. And I met / re met after a few years.... After our crazy 20s 30s and 40s, he was insistent on me getting support / I begged him to come to an awesome vollunteering program support place once or twice where we met this WOnderful social worker who ...... Ended up seeing me ( for free) who ..... Yeah he met my hub at One. of my sessions...... He is blown away at my hub. Brilliance and compassion and dearly wants to catch up with him but my hub. Doesn't want to. The end.

Your mother In law reminds me of mine except yours .... who is dearly trying to do the right thing.

I ask you @Former-Member; please don't believe I am right I do say a lot of things. And annoying psychobabble too ask anyone. I don't always get it right

...... Does it feel like this talking about money and everything is just a coverup for her help she is giving to you ?
Can you just pay attention and say: I care about you and what you are doing for me. Put in the back of your mind that ..you are getting to see P. I. Recovery.

Before I wrote more: what do you think being in a relationship with an alcoholic means ? Who is the partner IN a relationship with ? Is it the woman or the bottle ?

How is his girlfriend going ? Sorry, how is his bottle of drinking going ?

Aren't I cutting. I don't mean to be. I don't feel your darling partner wants to treat you wrong either. I know ; that he cannot help how his mother acts but there must be a lot of stress thinking about whether she is 'okay.' For him.

I dearly apologise if I have been too Only my thinking. These forums are about dialogues not monologues.

Public housing is great. I am so thankful for the Government to give me a unit right next to the beach .......it also helped me relax enough for me to join Sane forums, for me to sort my own life out.
There are some terribly bad housing managers and there are some who have come to my house just to drop in for an hour to talk to my hub. In the back courtyard. Wowl....... Even drop a plastic bag of bread and cheese knowing that he was going through a lot at one stage.

There are tenants that you do not in. Period. You and the rest of society have done terrible things to them and you need to pay by them stealing your things.

My two sons though they dearly love my hub. Also are slightly stressed I do too much. They are healthily ...... Asking me if all is good.

In response to: Re: Night Shift

AppleblossomSenior Contributor02 Dec 2015, 11:57 pm AEDT

Re: Night Shift

@PeppiPatty I so love the way you discussed the problem of people stealing ... you are more diplomatic than me!!

Yes public housing can be great .. but same as in fancy suburbs ... there are rip off merchants everywhere ... but also so many decent people its important not to get paranoid ... just careful.

I only clean son's bedroom blind about once a year ... as it never goes up ... but gets webby ...

In the rest of the house he would pull blinds down immediately I let them up ... but i figured it was a waste of my energy .... and just do it occasionally now ...

BUT the best bit was that I stopped putting MY blind up .. my bedroom looks straight out on street and though not too many people come by .. I decided to leave it down too.

@Former-Member and @Mazarita hope you are doing ok?

In response to: Re: Night Shift

MazaritaSenior Contributor03 Dec 2015, 12:13 am AEDT

Re: Night Shift

Hi @Appleblossom, Big social day here in the real world. Overwired from it, but it was a good day too. Since then I've been video editing, just playing around with simple images and music. Having some tech issues along the way.

In response to: Re: Night Shift

AppleblossomSenior Contributor03 Dec 2015, 12:53 am AEDT

Re: Night Shift

Glad its been social and creative. Are there rolling or moving images?

I am still to sort out my general tech issues. Getting used to technology ... havent used digital keyboard much .. still have to wire up some studio monitors etc.

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