Night Shift

@haventgivenup, sounds like you had a lot pent up there that you had to get out. Would you like me to remove that last post? Happy to do it if you want.

@haventgivenup, deleted it for you. I hope you felt some release after having typed it at least.

Hi again @Former-Member

I was alone on Mothers Day - I am alone for most of the events that happen in our lives -

Luckily I get along by myself - if there is one person in the world who understands me - that's myself

I went shopping at Southland with my daughter and grand-daughter on the Wednesday before - and I bought my electronic piano keyboard - yes - I am a pianist - but I have a of catching up to do - and a watch for a mother's day present to myself. My daughter worked on Mothers Day - and for the last few years - my birthday too

My grand-daughter has chronic fatique syndrome - she is in her early 20s - and I have always been on the outside of my family - so I don't get to celebrations - and I plant my foot once a year - Christmas Day - and I think my daughter knows this

However - on Mothers Day I got several texts from my daughter - the weather was atrocious - and she works in a nursery and they were busy until about 2.00pm and then had to tidy up after the weather and the rush on the shopping

So this is the Status Quo - I put up with this without comment through the year - and at Christmas I make an issue -

I could go on - but I know how it is to have a chronic condition and also have a sick child

So I am waiting - how was mother's day for me? - quiet

How was it for you? - You were numbed by the flu - and you were changed forever by Jo's death

I was nearly destroyed when my son died - but over time it has defined me - I was meant to be his mother - no two ways about it - and your kind words - thank you so much - that is wonderful

Decadian

Hi. Is anyone around?

Up again in the middle of the night. This time I've had 4.5 hours sleep. I wonder when I will sleep through an entire night until morning again. The last time it happened was a couple of months ago, staying out in the country with a good friend I've known for 40 years. It was so very quiet out there, kilometres from even the smallest settlement, she and I and the cat she rescued from when it was a feral kitten. Around her little place, lots of open space. Secure in long friendship, peaceful at a distance from densely populated civilisation.

Yes, I'm in one of those middle-of-the-night reflective moods, like when I first started this discussion thread.

Yesterday's cooking class was the last of the series of five sessions, out of which I made it to three. They were all good but I found them intense as well: first of all making it to morning start times; then the challenge of social engagement; participating in cooking which I usually avoid like the plague; menopausal overheating in the process; being on constantly-sore feet and legs for two to three hours straight; keeping up a friendly face. As usual, I seemed sort of okay at the time and I doubt anyone could have guessed any of the above. But when I got home: collapse and the need for strong pain relief. Couldn't even muster the energy to engage on the forum, which is really saying something in me!

In fact, I've often found that, in my worst states, I simply can't speak about it. I guess that means the forum gets me at my best for the most part.

At which point I'll desist from this monologue and just say hi to whoever else might be out there again at this time. Hope the late night is treating you well.

@plasmo, I find it's worth the challenge, even if a bit of recovery time is needed. You could probably find stuff like that in your local area on google.