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RE: Darkness surrounds me
6693 replies
In response to: RE: Darkness surrounds me
Sans911Senior Contributor
Re: RE: Darkness surrounds me
@Former-Member 💜💙💜💙💜💙
In response to: Re: RE: Darkness surrounds me
Unknown userMember
Re: RE: Darkness surrounds me
I am ok I guess. In a fair bit of pain atm but just need to take it easy for now. I am not coping and I know that. Had appt. with psychologist today and told him everything about last night.
Thank you for caring
@Sans911 @outlander
In response to: RE: Darkness surrounds me
outlanderSenior Contributor
Re: RE: Darkness surrounds me
Hugs @Former-Member did you go to the ED? No need to say if you dont want to. Im glad you spoke to your psych 💜💙💜
In response to: RE: Darkness surrounds me
Sans911Senior Contributor
Re: RE: Darkness surrounds me
Did you SH last night @Former-Member? Is that what you mean by 'pain'? Is there anything I /we can do? I am happy to listen or sit hun. I'm so sorry thing are difficult for you.
In response to: Re: RE: Darkness surrounds me
Unknown userMember
Re: RE: Darkness surrounds me
@Sans911yes I SH last night quite a bit. No @outlander I probably should have gone to the ED but ended up speaking to someone and was able to stop eventually.
I don't think anyone can do anything. I just need to keep my SI under control which is hard when they are screaming at you. Just baby steps and lots of self care today and tonight.
In response to: Re: RE: Darkness surrounds me
outlanderSenior Contributor
Re: RE: Darkness surrounds me
im sorry your going through all this @Former-Member i really hope things become easier for you soon. im glad that you were able to speak to someone and gain control. lots of self care and keeping yourself safe tonight.
maybe when your hubby gets back its time to consider some respite and help yourself and allow others to help you more but take it day by day for now
In response to: Re: RE: Darkness surrounds me
Unknown userMember
Re: RE: Darkness surrounds me
@outlanderpsych spoke about respite again today which I think we will look into when hubby gets home. He was going to email my psychiatrist too who I see on Wednesday anyway.
How have you been today?
In response to: RE: Darkness surrounds me
Sans911Senior Contributor
Re: RE: Darkness surrounds me
Oh @Former-Member how horrible. I know only too well about SI screaming at you. In the end you just want it to shut up and you'll do anything to make that happen. But I'm really pleased you reached out for help, and I know how hard that is as well. I'm feeling really invalidated by mental health professionals at 5he moment and within the last few weeks, who seem to think they know better than me and won't listen to my requests/demands.
Is this increase in SI thoughts to do with your husband being away or for other reasons? How much longer until he comes back?
Let's just do hour by hour tonight ok? Lots of self care, distractions, even radical acceptance if you can. This is where you don't place judgement on yourself for your SI thoughts, you accept that are part of a coping strategy because your pain is so great. Sometimes you have to repeat these things over and over again until you believe. It does make it a little easier to deal with. I'm here with you for a while yet tonight @Former-Member
Is this increase in SI thoughts to do with your husband being away or for other reasons? How much longer until he comes back?
Let's just do hour by hour tonight ok? Lots of self care, distractions, even radical acceptance if you can. This is where you don't place judgement on yourself for your SI thoughts, you accept that are part of a coping strategy because your pain is so great. Sometimes you have to repeat these things over and over again until you believe. It does make it a little easier to deal with. I'm here with you for a while yet tonight @Former-Member
In response to: Re: RE: Darkness surrounds me
outlanderSenior Contributor
Re: RE: Darkness surrounds me
ok thats good and im glad your psych is aware that your hubby isnt home and isnt forcing you to go in right now @Former-Member and im also glad your considering it as an option by the sounds of it
how long till your hubby is home?
im just taking things easy and taking it hr by hr
sending lots of hugs 
In response to: Re: RE: Darkness surrounds me
Unknown userMember
Re: RE: Darkness surrounds me
@Sans911I didn't know what else to do. I didn't want to go anywhere or have someone come out (I would have to take the kids with me). I knew I was far gone so rang. The lady I spoke to was so nice and spoke to me for ages until I had calmed down and stopped. I wish they were all like her.
I think the SI are a bit of both. Hubby being away isn't helping but it is also another trauma from my past that has been on my mind a lot lately. That bloody cloud thing did not work, they floated back to me.
Hour by hour sounds good to me.
Thank you for being here
