RE: Darkness surrounds me

@Former-Member Hi -Enigma- really happy that you got some sleep last night. Nothing worse than not sleeping. I have asked about volunterring but there is a waiting list where I live! goes to show there are good people about ... I am great today. I have lost me weight!!! my t shirts are starting to fit better. So cheers to another glass of water and another piece of veggie!

Good morning @Former-Member

Got about 5 hours sleep so that is good. Catching up on cross stich sounds good. I need to go to spotlight so I can start my next project. Thinking of another quilt so looking for ideas atm.

Hope you have a lovely day

@Former-Member Great you had 5 hours sleep that's pretty good 🙂

Good on you @Bunniekins for sticking to your New Years resolution diet and the great results! Feel good doesn't it. I have broken mine a few times but I tend on jumping back on the wagon and giving it another shot. Your health will thank you for your determination. I like drinking water - especially with a lemon squeezed in it 😊

@outlander - that was good of you to mind your sisters for awhile - the bonding will be good for all of you. You are a lovely person. Over the time I have been on here I have watched you grow - and although there are setbacks you seem wiser and more confident. Such a good thing my friend. We have moments of relapse - but okay if it's two steps forward, one back - three steps forward - two back - as long as we are moving forward with baby steps. Well done @outlander - you should feel proud.

Yes I do realise GPs are hesitant to prescribe addictive drugs because of the addiction they may cause and the litigation they can face - but the sedatives are produced and prescribed for a purpose - for individuals whom are severely distressed, in shock (which I was) or seriously anxious on a daily babsis. Most of them do not understand what this is like and the harm it can do if not sedated.

My circumstances having witnessed my daughter come close to passing away under such tragic circumstances placed me in shock and distress - this doctor should have given them to me when knowing this without question or hesitation. The doctor should have realised the medical ramifications of not sedating a person in shock (can be fatal or lead to physical and mental harm) - to question giving the lowest dose to me in my distress added to it and was negligent and out of touch in this instance.

They can go too far treating everyone like a potential drug addict and it's demeaning to the sufferer who feels helpless in their distress at the time. That's how I felt. It really caused harm at the time for me (which I still feel as you can see, sorry) and doctors need to review how to discern giving them in the right circumstances they are designed for and not treating everyone as a potential addict. They have their purpose. They can restrict scripts if they feel the latter is a problem.

I am happy to say I did get to see my regular saw doctor whom totally understood and offered them without hesitation. He did tell me doctors fear being screened if they prescribe them - it should be about the patients well being first before concerns of liability in my opinion and I voiced that - he agreed. I don't take them now as I do not need them. This is a big problem for those who suffer mental illness or shock when witnessing a tragic event. A person can be driven to harm themselves if not sedated under such circumstances if my opinion. It can be a hard call at times.

Sorry didn't mean for thenpost to be so long - I suppose it effected me worse than I realised. Thank you for your kindness and support. Enjoy the day everyone 💕

@Former-Member Thanks -Enigma- 😄 xx

Hi @Former-Member

Just saw your post. Glad you got some refreshing sleep. I love handmade quilts - I use to do some of this with friends when living in the country. They do look stunning. I could never take to a machine though which is weird as it is so much faster than sewing by hand - but enjoyed watching my friends finish theirs. Do you have any quilts you could put pics of up? Would love to see them if you have. Enjoy your trip to spotlight - let us know what design you end up going with ❤️

Hi @Sans911

Thanks for your post. The doctor who hesitated in giving the low dose sedative to me was a fill in at a medical practise for my own GP whilst he was on holidays. It was a repeat script of a very low dose that I tolerated well that he hesitated in giving me and I been on before with no adverse reactions, as he would of known from my records.

When I had a panic attack years ago the ED doctors and nurse at my local hospital was great and did offer me short term sedation that same evening once evaluating after lung x-days that it was shock (x-rays clear). I had just received news of my fathers prognosis of terminal cancer. The hospital I have attended and medical staff do a wonderful job. Thank you for your care of others in your nursing, it is very much appreciated. I think it needs to be said more. Hope you are doing well.

Thank you @Sans911

Emergency department nursing work is very stressful - I had friends who had to leave because they couldn't do it anymore as the stress was adversely effecting them; especially night shift seemed to knock them around. One took a break for a year or so then went back to work at a medical practise during the day which she now loves.

Maybe when you feel better in time you could look at other nursing options that is less demanding? Or other career options that are similar? I do feel for you - I know what it is like to lose what matters when having a breakdown which incorporated an attempt. Many abandoned me, I lost 3 children and my entire side of the family, and all my plans and goals went down the drain. All my dreams shattered. It took quite a few years before I felt well enough to step outside again (I became agoraphobic as a result and high anxiety is a problem for me at times - I can go into shock) Now I am in the process of reinventing purpose, dreams and a life again. Hang in there, it's possible.