RE: Darkness surrounds me

keep talking lovely... im not going anywhere till like 5oclock and thats only to get meds

i havent heard that song yet, give me a sec and ill take a listen to it @Former-Member

@outlanderjust be carful hun, I don't want to trigger you. The first few times I listened to it I ended up in tears.

You said the only peace we get is accepting that we have given up on hope.

That is exactly how I feel at the moment. I feel like hope as evaporated

i didnt listen to it, i just read the lyrics so it took the emotions out of it and i dont really have many emotions today, ive had to numb it all @Former-Member very powerful song indeed!

unfortuantly thats how i feel as well and it got me in trouble and continues to get me into trouble. seems to be a very common theme here lately

thats why i bumped up the hope thread, we need more hope here

@outlanderI saw you bumped up the Hope thread. Just got nothing to add to it unfortunately. I just seem to keep making the wrong choices and end up hurting everyone around me. It is just consuming my life 24 hours a day and there is no relief what so ever. I can't see anyway out anymore

how are you going @Former-Member

posted at the same time @Former-Member thats ok sweet, neither do i but it helps others too, engima likes it and it helps her so im hopinh it helps others too.

ptsd is a b**ch Nell, mental health consumes us and when you give up hope it takes over even more and makes it harder to get back out.

ive been told that it does get easier and there have been success stories on here so im trying to believe them. we all want things to change but most of the time we question our ability, our power, to change that.

That dolphin looks great @outlander you have got a real talent sis.

yea we do want things to change, I guess just hard to see that change happening when all I feel it stuck. And maybe its my own expectations on myself. Like I am see both a psychologist and psychiatrist now yet things seem to be getting worse. So is it me, am I doing something wrong, am I not trying hard enough. I don't know, there just seem to be so many questions and no answers

Hi @Former-Member,

I am sorry to hear that you are struggling so much at the moment. I hear that you have tried to stay safe, but you can't see a way out at the moment. For this reason, I have sent you a check-in email.

Please reach out, if you are feeling unsafe.

Kind Regards,

Amour_Et_Psyché

thanks sis @Former-Member lots of practice to even get that far.

im hearing you. im feeling the same way and questioning the worth of things. it seems since i opened up about things its all just gotten so much more worse than if i had of kept my mouth shut. they say they help but when the help isnt helping then what do you do? i wish i had the answer as it would help me too and Sans as well.

its not you sweet, your doing everything and anything possible to help yourself, i think once we open up it like a volcano erupting and we can no longer handle once we thought we could because all that stuff we shoved down and just kept shoving down both intentionally and unintentionally has now started to overdflow

this proably isnt helping you is it... but i do understand what your talking about and i really wihs i had the answers myself to help you and others in this situation