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Well I'm finally home (again). 4 hospital stays in 91 days. Wow. No wonder it feels so strange to be in my own house again. Adjusting will take time. Cooking for myself will take time. My house is in the same condition in which I left it. A pigsty. So no one room has warmth and charm to lift my mood. Will have to slowly start cleaning up - one room at a time. I did go and watch my son play soccer in the finals. I'd been so sick this year - thst it was the first game I had been to all year. His team lost. But they play again next week. So still stand a chance of playing the grand final. My son is still living with my mum. Has been since the end of April. Hopefully he will see how much I've improved on my new anti depressants and anti anxiety meds. Then he may choose to come home soon. Was up and doing the washing early this morning. But now reading a book in bed. Am very bored. But have AA Meeting tomorrow night. And I have my WorkCover IME (independent Medical Examination) - psych interview with a tough psychiatric on the 30th of this month. Think it could be on Wednesday. And then I have my much waited for Psychologist appointment. Can't see him when I'm in hospital (too far away). So that's it for now. A new thread for a new beginning. @Zoe7@soul@Former-Member@Faith-and-Hope@Bast@oceangirl@outlander@Former-Member@Teej@BlueBay@Owlunar
feeling a little bit better in the kidney area , but i will keep taking the AB`s , feeling very tired now after a busy day today
In response to: HOME
utopiaSenior Contributor
Re: HOME
Rest up @Shaz51.
In response to: HOME
utopiaSenior Contributor
Re: HOME
Have been feeling like my mood was going up and up these past few weeks. Slowly getting better and feeling like I might get back to where I was at the end of last year. Living life. Today, flat. My mood has dropped. How can it drop so quickly? I'm taking my meds. I'm getting sunshine. But no - I'm worried I'm going to crash again. And I'm remembering what that feels like. And I don't want to go back to that dark place again. I can't yo-yo this quickly. Can I? How do I go from Friday - feeling on a high - to today - scared I'm going to get sucked into this vortex of depression & disappear again. How can I ever know if I'm going to get better? If one day I'll stop having Major Depression. Surely this diagnosis can be temporary. Yet here I am - flat! And because I remember how low I can get - feeling flat could be the beginning of another episode. I have to stop feeling like this. It could just be a flat day. And that's all. Just one day. I say it. But my mind doesn't believe it.
In response to: HOME
Unknown userMember
Re: HOME
Anxiety over it can make it worse @utopia, I get scared too when sensing similar steps to the dark places I know I am capable of falling. That lack of trust in self and the future.
Do you have a 'self-care action plan' when you sense this coming on? Reconnect with a self hep group, up the walking, eat healthier, drink more water, see psychologist and or case manager... etc etc Get in early.
Sometimes it can be as simple as 'coming down with a cold' - a physical thing. This happened to me last week, once I realised what it was I didn't worry so much.
Hang in there! You have many more skills under your belt now. Take care 🌷🌿
In response to: Re: HOME
soulSenior Contributor
Re: HOME
Can you dig into that self care box that you made @utopia? Maybe it needs a top up. Agree with all @Former-Member to say. Get plenty of rest. Sleep deprivation is awful.
Try to achieve something tomorrow that you wouldn't normally do, even just the smallest thing. I'm going to clean out the cupboard in my kitchen that has all the shopping bags in it. Some I keep for lining the kitchen bin and a couple for transporting stuff but the rest can be thrown away.
In response to: HOME
utopiaSenior Contributor
Re: HOME
@Former-Member@soul - just going to take some meds to help me sleep. Maybe after a good sleep I'llfeel ddifferent in the morning.
In response to: Re: HOME
soulSenior Contributor
Re: HOME
Sweet dreams @utopia. Catch up with you tomorrow.
In response to: Re: HOME
Shaz51Senior Contributor
Re: HOME
Hello my awesome wonderful friend @utopia, how are you today xoxoxo
In response to: Re: HOME
utopiaSenior Contributor
Re: HOME
@Shaz51. Feeling better than yesterday.
How are you and your Kidney going? Are the AB working now?
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