not coping

i might look into a weighted blanket @Snowie one that isnt to heavy though. ive heard theyre good for grounding and thats what im needing. something that helps me feel safe.

thank you @creative_writer one of the hardest things im needing to do is box up some of nans things. i havent really even been in that room since shes passed away or at least not 'her' side of the room.

i am fatiguing alot but i also cant sit still either as i feel like i need to keep moving somehow. i cleaned the entire bathroom today including the roof and i got a couple new towels to put in the linen closst after fully cleaning that out too.

@tyme

the package wouldve allowed cleaning however as hes on respite all of that is paused. the only thing it can be used for now is product purchases so im trying to get him a new bed a electric recliner before the end of the respite time

his kids are selfish and i would rather them not help. theyve treated me like an outcast for the last few years it would just be awkward. they use to do things like invite pop out but not me to dinner and other events and when we had family events they wouldnt even speak to me id just sit by myself and play on my phone or watch the younger kids that were inside play with their toys etc.
ill slowly get there. the laundry is cleaned out, the dining room is cleaned out just have to wipe down walls etc. ive cleaned all the kitchen including taken stuff to a donation place and cleaned inside all the cupboards. i brought a cheap basic dinner set to use for now.
ive done the bathroom and the linen closet as well. im slowly starting pops room and the loungeroom but the loungeroom will probably be last more with my bedroom as ill obviously still be living here for a few months so still need some furniture etc as well

@Jynx are you still around

struggling a little @Jynx

i dont think the support worker i have really wants to be around me so its becoming a challange

Oh yeah, yikes @outlander that would be really tough. Are they new? Does the org have any processes to step in if there's a mismatch or conflict with the SW?

Would absolutely be a challenge - what's the point of a support worker if you aren't actually feeling supported by them? Just unnecessary stress hey.

she is the boss of the company @Jynx but she doesnt seem to want to do anything that i would like to do. she only schedules in time for basic things, wants me to open up and speak about issues but when i do i get the brush off responses. she seems bored with me and not really wanting to book in any times or anything unless it suits her

@outlander ohhh double yikes. Can't go over her head then ay. Is this company the only one you can access? And/or do you think she'd be open to you highlighting that she's not meeting your support needs?

Also, I realise I've gone into problem-solving mode and acknowledge this may not be helpful. I'm about to log off for the night, but I'll be around tomorrow if you wanted to chat more then?

Sending you some huggles darl 🫂💜🫂

she is making my support services alot cheaper at the moment @Jynx so i feel bad saying anything. she even takes me on shopping trips for free but only if its for her.