not coping

@outlander, I think it’s worth looking in a MH nurse. Chronic pain and MH are too intertwined, they feed off each other, I hope getting more support with also help you physically.

One meds is a migraine med and mood stabiliser in one. My migraines are the worst when my emotions are heightened, even euphoria will produce a migraine. I guess it just happens bipolar and migraines are related for me. But yes, migraine meds can come with side effects. I wish I wasn’t on so much meds, but my brain just won’t take it without them right now

oh yes they sure are @creative_writer

i have one of the most severest neuropathic conditions so its taken alot to manage it and ive been lucky enough to be diagnosed with it early so it can be managed early.

ive been able to slowly get off many medications except im back on a couple now but keeping it minimal otherwise im to overloaded. i also struggle with tablets as a swollowing thing always have done so i have to be mindful of how many im taking or more so the size of them. if i can get a liquid version, or soluble or the ones that dissolve orally then i get them and its less stress trying to take medications!

@outlander, neurological conditions are painful. I wish you the best on your healing journey💝

I want to get at a point when I don’t need as much, but right now it’s about achieving some stability, nobody will be willing to touch my meds considering my recent rough patches. Maybe one day

sometimes you need to get through the crap to reach the better things @creative_writer
i tried several medications in the past and it honestly caused me more issues then what it was worth in the most part so i decided to try and go without or use minimally.
i have been in a mental health hospital a couple of times previously for sh and an an attempt, i have been at a point where i was needing to go and see my gp every second day or at the very least a phone call if i didnt answer or return the call within half an hour they would call the cops on me to do a welfare check. i was requiring medical treament for mh sh and it was becoming harder to hide it visibly and mentally. it ust got so draining hiding everything. it has been very intense in my past and while im not great ive sadly learnt to know what to say to make people believe im fine and to keep out of that situation any more. im also very selective who i speak to. but ive also learnt to cope better then the past. i still have some really bad phases but im learning to manage them abit better. its why i want to help people. i know what its like to have no hope, no light in the tunnel and nothing but sh and SI day in day out. i still suffer them and have acted a few times recently but i try my best to keep them in the background. they never go away but i can sort of ignore them when they are abit more quieter

ive just finished a short course on traumatic brain injuries and concussion in the time ive been on shift. gosh its going so slowly! only an hour to go now

@outlander, I guess meds are about weighing pros and cons. If you were experiencing more cons, it makes sense to reduce them. We do learn to cope with things over time and our potential triggers. It’s good the urges have become quieter over time. My urges tend to come out the most during the fun mixed episodes.

A part of me wishes my mental health issues will vanish and I’ll be okay. Maybe you can call it wishful thinking, but I just don’t want to be stuck with this. They say bipolar is lifelong and needs medication, but it just frustrates me you know, like is there any other way I can fix my brain so it functions like other people? It’s so exhausting living with bipolar, social anxiety, cptsd, ASD

You’re almost there!

Oh how it would be nice to have a normal functioning brain @creative_writer I guess we just have to do the best we can with the brains we have hey

@outlander, it’s true we can only do the best we can. I suppose my brain was always too neurodivergent from the start, but nobody knew, because ASD presents differently among girls, particularly if you’re high functioning. I guess that’s why I always felt different

Sometimes my conditions can be hard to diagnose esp during growth phases or when high functioning @creative_writer

On the outside I look very well managed and nothing at all wrong with me but internally that’s another story

@outlander, I think I can also look like I’m coping on the outside when I’m not. I think we become so good at masking