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Something’s not right

not coping

outlanderSenior Contributor04 Aug 2017, 8:11 pm AEST

not coping

im not coping

i cant handle all of these things

besides my mental health deteriorating so dramatically, and my physicall health floating up the creek

and now within the past few hours

my great grandmother now is in a nursing home and they dont know how long she has left and to make thigns worse i think i have to put my beleoved horse down.

we just had vets out and spend the last 4 hours trying to save my horse. its been 2 hours and went back to check on her and its not looking good.

not good at all 😞 😞 😞 😞 😞 😞 😞 😞

i dont know what to do or how to feel, im a complete mess 😞

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In response to: not coping

outlanderSenior Contributor03 June 2023, 5:46 pm AEST

Re: not coping

the surgery itself is estimated about an hour or 2 at the most. i have to have a week off work though and minimal stuff like horses and anything that risks reopening wounds and im not allowed to go walking either for at least 2 weeks or until i get the all clear that i can at least go for short walks.
have to do things that wont make me sweat either as i have to minimise showers for at least a week.

no pop doesnt know. he will be staying home and my aunt will be there and i have a couple of activities planned for him with the family across the couple of days i wont be home. we are all sticking to the story that im staying with a friend for a couple of days which isnt a lie because i am for a few days where its quiet and no expectations and help if i need it but he doesnt know im having surgery

In response to: Re: not coping

SnowieSenior Contributor03 June 2023, 5:53 pm AEST

Re: not coping

That is fair enough @outlander Least your Pop won't worry and it is probably easier to say you are just staying at your friends house. Less explaining to him too.

I'm glad you have someone around that can look after you. It will be a nice change for you to be looked after instead of looking after others.

Hopefully your after surgery goes well and your wounds heal nicely. That last thing you want is to aggravate them.

In response to: Re: not coping

outlanderSenior Contributor03 June 2023, 6:17 pm AEST

Re: not coping

if he knows im going for surgery all he will do is excessively worry. sounds nicer saying im staying witha friend instead. i have hired a nurse to come and help as well. my insurance is basically paying for it or enough for 3 visits between the day after and the day i go see the surgeon for a review so thats good too. i wont exactly be with a friend as much, shes lending me the granny flat she uses for an air bnb but will pop in if i need anything and for some company. @Snowie

In response to: Re: not coping

tymeModerator03 June 2023, 6:19 pm AEST

Re: not coping

We are thinking of you @outlander . Hope it all goes well.

Please reach out even for moral support. We will be hear waiting to hear from you.

At this time, us it to focus on your own self-care. You deserve it.

In response to: Re: not coping

outlanderSenior Contributor03 June 2023, 6:23 pm AEST

Re: not coping

thanks @tyme youll see me around for a couple more days yet. i dont need to leave till thursday morning but super early

In response to: Re: not coping

SnowieSenior Contributor03 June 2023, 6:23 pm AEST

Re: not coping

That would of course be a better option for your Pop @outlander No point getting him all worried.

Good to hear you have been able to organise extra help for him. Least it will be one less thing for you to worry about.

In response to: Re: not coping

outlanderSenior Contributor03 June 2023, 6:25 pm AEST

Re: not coping

im worrying enough for the both of us at this point anyway lol @Snowie

yep hes going to get a haircut and proper shave the first day and lunch at the club with his social supports, going to watch a movie at the cinemas the next and going to dinner with some family the day after so it gives him something to look forward to

In response to: Re: not coping

SnowieSenior Contributor03 June 2023, 6:38 pm AEST

Re: not coping

Wow @outlander you certainly have everything organised well. I'm sure he will enjoy himself.

Took my mum to the movies last weekend. We saw the John Farnham film. Was really good.

I'm sure you are worried hon, I think that is probably a normal reaction to having an op.

In response to: Re: not coping

outlanderSenior Contributor03 June 2023, 7:29 pm AEST

Re: not coping

being organised helps make me less nervous @Snowie if i keep busy and feel like im organised it helps manage the nerves.

pop would prob like that movie. theyre looking at going to the new horror movie though or the guardians of the galaxy one. something pop would actually sit and watch otherwise he just fidgets and wants to go home

In response to: Re: not coping

SnowieSenior Contributor03 June 2023, 7:34 pm AEST

Re: not coping

You are always super organised @outlander especially when it comes to your Pop.

I'm sure he will like the movie. Gets him out and about too.

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Torres Strait Islander flag

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SANE acknowledges the Traditional Owners of Country throughout Australia and recognises the continuing connection to lands, waters and communities. We pay our respect to Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander cultures; and to Elders past and present.

SANE values diversity. We are committed to providing a safe, culturally appropriate, and inclusive service for all people, regardless of their ethnicity, faith, disability, sexuality, or gender identity.