Wish I didn't like ice cream @outlander, yes I know the feeling of slavehood with my mother,got up early to do housework,and went out the door at 9 because I knew the sunshine wasn't going to last and I knew I needed to go because my depression and anxiety is debilitating me, I've lost interest in everything,and been in bed for over two days retreating from the world.I spoke to her this afternoon,been in the same house and stopped talking on Thursday due to a issue.Even tonight,she made a comment when I said I didn't like a person (because I went to school with her),she said "you don't like anyone".She makes commentscI don't like and she can be very spiteful when and how she says it.
The best thing you can do @outlander is be around the horses,but I do know what you mean I used to hate facing the animal graves, especially the horse who have a big pile of dirt above ground.I had a problem with foxes, getting into the graves,I had a collie rough with his skull on the ground once,then my Jack Russell brought up his teeth to the house one day,I knew they were his ,had to bury them in the garden.Lol.A wombat dug a hole in my cow grave I could see her skull.The amazing part of that was her offspring used to get in it and rub their heads in it...I went over one day and it was completely sealed over..It was as if they knew.
It won't be easy but you have another horse that depends on you,I think you need that.