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not coping

outlanderSenior Contributor04 Aug 2017, 8:11 pm AEST

not coping

im not coping

i cant handle all of these things

besides my mental health deteriorating so dramatically, and my physicall health floating up the creek

and now within the past few hours

my great grandmother now is in a nursing home and they dont know how long she has left and to make thigns worse i think i have to put my beleoved horse down.

we just had vets out and spend the last 4 hours trying to save my horse. its been 2 hours and went back to check on her and its not looking good.

not good at all 😞 😞 😞 😞 😞 😞 😞 😞

i dont know what to do or how to feel, im a complete mess 😞

18135 replies

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In response to: not coping

outlanderSenior Contributor19 Aug 2021, 11:57 am AEST

Re: not coping

Hi @Sophia1 its ok, im keeping off it, i need to go back to the drs though for it, it looks like a section of the brusing is opening up like a wound and thats not suppose to happen.
its really taking a toll mentally now though, having alot of anxiety and depressive episodes. its hard to sleep or do anything when its so bothersome all the time.

i am studying equine husbandry module 1 right now, every module is actually a certificate in itself so works out well. will have 5 individual certificates at the end plus the overall so 6 all up. might even do the advanced certificate afterwards but itll take me about a year to finish this course.

In response to: Re: not coping

SnowieSenior Contributor20 Aug 2021, 3:00 pm AEST

Re: not coping

Good afternoon @outlander

Hoping your day is going ok for you.

Lots of love and hugs 💗💗💗

In response to: Re: not coping

Sophia1Senior Contributor20 Aug 2021, 7:13 pm AEST

Re: not coping

oh my goodness @outlander

that does not sound good opening up....

I hope that does not mean that you have been on your feet too often or for too long a period.....

can you get an urgent appointment if is exposed?

Of course it is taking a toll dear outlander....

along with the rest of the list that you have been enduring for how long now...

not to remind you or make you fell worse...

to let you see that you have every reason to feel worn out and over it....

however...

you are studying....and wow how many people can study and put in as much work as you have when well let alone with everything that I mentioned higher up.....

I seriously hope that you are not still looking after family chores....

Are you?

I know I should not press you...

Doctor appointment vital

Foot up vital unless doctor or physiotherapist advises otherwise...

continue study vital....

listen to me.... well....you would not be the first not to laugh...ask my husband...

please please look after your body...at such a young age so important...your body is what will be carrying you for the rest of your life remember....we only get one....in this lifetime anyway..

love

Sophia 1 💜

In response to: Re: not coping

jem80Senior Contributor20 Aug 2021, 7:35 pm AEST

Re: not coping

@outlander

Please take care of yourself.

what an achievement to be studying.

take Care and look after yourself during these challenging times.

In response to: Re: not coping

outlanderSenior Contributor20 Aug 2021, 7:41 pm AEST

Re: not coping

@Snowie

missing you @Sans911 miss our chats

In response to: Re: not coping

outlanderSenior Contributor20 Aug 2021, 7:41 pm AEST

Re: not coping

thank you @jem80 i am doing my best
i hope your ok..?

In response to: Re: not coping

Sophia1Senior Contributor20 Aug 2021, 7:47 pm AEST

Re: not coping

sorry @outlander

noticing you reaching out to your long term supports and understanding totally..

I do hope that I have not triggered you in anyway..

Please honestly let me know I would rather be aware than cause you more concern...

I will leave you in peace for now...

In response to: Re: not coping

outlanderSenior Contributor20 Aug 2021, 7:49 pm AEST

Re: not coping

ive to the drs today @Sophia1 and looks like ill be in a moonboot providing i can tolerate it. the part that i thought was opening isnt, its just becoming a weird scab but dr said its ok for now but just keep an eye on it.

have had an ultrasound as well and will get results back on monday when i see the physio for boot fitting. there is alot of swelling, more then what i thought and more then what dr thinks as well, the swelling extends from toes all the way to my ankle. waiting on more results about tendons ligaments etc

i plan to get to the advanced levels in equine care then specialise in something if i make it that far.

i am still helping look after sibling, we are in a lockdown zone so i help with some homeschooling or she will just amuse herself mostly if theres things to do.
still have to do housework too, cant get help in so i just do one or 2 things a day instead

how are you?

In response to: Re: not coping

outlanderSenior Contributor20 Aug 2021, 7:58 pm AEST

Re: not coping

@Sophia1 i just replied, sorry i was on my phone. its really hard to write the longer replies on it. your most welcome here and i appreciate you being here for me

hopefully youll see this msg and the above msg to you too

In response to: Re: not coping

Sophia1Senior Contributor20 Aug 2021, 7:59 pm AEST

Re: not coping

well good to hear that they are keeping on top of what is going on with your foot

moon boot....?

I am assuming that they are taking into account swelling,,,,bruising...and now new opening?

keep on asking questions and do not let them throw you off...you have every right..

I will step back now I promise...

housework...

vitals are wet areas...

dusting...when have free time after doing above bearing in mind what is above above...

hoovering...yes important as you have allergies...

can sibling do hoovering...not sure of situation there...?

I am going to step back outlander as I think that I might be triggering you with my style of support which I realise probably comes across as overwhelming at the moment...

I know that I am not usually this intense usually more empathic..

possibly remembering long conversations of what you have had to deal with...

so I do hope that your normal support people on here tune in so to speak soon...

I wish for you a life of your own where you can choose to be with your family rather than have to be..

bye for now

Sophia 1

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