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Hi Readers, i am suffering from "mental health issues" and it is an ongoing, daily battle. I am pretty much constantly wrestling with the thoughts going on in my mind. And my psychical life seems too be suffering for it. (There is a huge difference between physical and mental ) something is definitely not right! So each day I'm waking up and going about my routine. And over the last few days, weeks and months. I have been noticing changes in my mentality toward myself, others and life. And some questions such as, what is my life about? And what should my objectives be? Have arisen... of course like we all are, I'm subject too making decisions... and there has been the same options in front of me time and time again for months on end. And it becomes rather draining and mundane. And i feel myself going around in circles like something simple just ain't connecting.
I enjoy writing, art, music. And peace of mind... walking, reading, meditation. Taking care of myself. Socialising. Etcetera. Getting ahead, getting in front. Planning, dreaming and so on. And do my best to look after myself. While accepting that it can only ever be so much.
But there just something not quite right. And I'm suffering for it on a daily basis. And I'm tired and fed up with going through the same stuff everyday. And in all honesty. Alot of my suffering comes from prospective and thought processes.
Does anyone wanna talk with me about some things that might help? In particular dealing with people no matter who they are. Can be very stressful and cause lots of procrastinating about pros and cons. In particularly people who i think about reaching out to for support. Because of dilemmas dramas and social dynamics. And picking up on things that "aint really happening" "gut feelings type of stuff " "intuition" that type of thing. And enjoying time with people is great! I just tend to be overly preoccupied with symptoms to be worried about socialising sometimes "Symptoms which involves others"
Yea @Bunniekins I'm hearing you... it's kind of like we need other people, but there is a fine line between to much of people. I know i get fed up with alot of people in my life, it's like a line between stuff all of you, i can't take it anymore. And, help me, I'm suffering, i can't do this on my own... Definitely a split between how i feel about other people- In real life...
In response to: Re: Sharing the wisdom within
eudemonismSenior Contributor
Re: Sharing the wisdom within
How you going @Zoe7 ???
In response to: Coming to terms with reality
eudemonismSenior Contributor
Re: Sharing the wisdom within
How you going @Appleblossom ???
In response to: Re: Sharing the wisdom within
BunniekinsSenior Contributor
Re: Sharing the wisdom within
@eudemonism yep I couldn't agree more. It is like tomorrow I will see my mother, who I really like BUT after a few hours I am like OMG! I need some space as she is so demanding upon me. Thank god for the forums where I can talk with people and do it in such a way that I don't get overloaded. Or if I do I can say I gotta go and people here understand whereas people in real world don't necessarilly do.
In response to: Re: Sharing the wisdom within
eudemonismSenior Contributor
Re: Sharing the wisdom within
I told my mum yesterday. I'm busy, i got stuff to do. And it felt really good @Zoe7 i care for her, i love her, I respect her and think very highly of her. But in that moment, i needed space and i told her. Instead of ending up bitter, twisted, spiteful, vindictive and angry. Because she was all about herself and her agenda once again. I made it about me! And what i needed and wanted. Instead of sugar coating things, pep talking her, adjusting and working with her needs, wants and agendas. I felt like i gained ground. Because for ages now, I've had huge problems with speaking my mind in conversation. Holding my tongue type of things. It just gets me down...
In response to: Re: Sharing the wisdom within
eudemonismSenior Contributor
Re: Sharing the wisdom within
@Hope4me how you going with your smoking darling? I'm hear to chat with if yoy ever need. I'm super happy that you've given up, very impressive and very good work. It's only early days, but hang in there, it's worth it. Life will still have it's ups and downs... but you'll just be doing it smoke free from now on... hopefully i won't be far behind...
In response to: Re: Sharing the wisdom within
Zoe7Senior Contributor
Re: Sharing the wisdom within
Sounds like you did a great job with youor mum yesterday @eudemonism Sometimes we need that distance even though we love our family.
I managed some weeding today - got most of what I wanted to get done over the weekend finished so tomorrow I can get a few more plants and plant them straight away. Not sure what I will get yet - I would like a couple more Azaleas but other than that will see what they have and then choose from there.
My sister came around for a visit - she brought her dog with her (which she usually does). He is a funny dog - totally ball obsessed but he is still a lovely dog. I got a bit too close to him grabbing at the ball today and he got my finger. It isn't too bad - more a graze than a full on bite which is lucky.
In response to: Re: Sharing the wisdom within
eudemonismSenior Contributor
Re: Sharing the wisdom within
Yea @Zoe7 i was wondering where you was all day, busy in the garden, i now know. Yea I'm gonna do it with all people in my pifr from now on, and I'm hoping others also do it to me, because it's healthy and good for all involved, definitely a good sign. That's great that you have a good relationship with your sister, just going off of what you've told me, family support is great. Did you eat or have a drink with her? I'm sure you'll find some lovely plants for your garden at the nursery, they always have plenty of variety, are you after big? Small? Edible? Flowers/ornamental? I'm thinking about ducking down to the shops and grabbing a chicken, some chips and ice cream... naughty naughty naughty me...
In response to: Re: Sharing the wisdom within
Zoe7Senior Contributor
Re: Sharing the wisdom within
I've eaten all my donuts so can't share thse with you @eudemonism lol
I have an ok relationship with my sister and my parents - my sister and I have become closer over the last year or so. None of them know about my MH and that is how it needs to be. I tried talking to my sister quite some time ago but it was very clear she didn;t want to listen so I have pretty much gone through all this alone. My gp and pdoc have been great supports however and this forum has kept me afloat - that is pretty much the extent of the support I have had.
I am looking for some smaller flowering plants to add a little colour to two sections of the garden and then maybe some ferns for the other section. I often just get what I like and then decide where to plant them though. I will see what varieties they have and get what I like. I have a couple of spots that just about anything will grow but another couple which need lots of watering so drought tolerant plants may be better there.
The spot down the side of my house needs things moved and then weeded and then I can plant some veggies in there - it won't be done until next weekend though probably - want to get the backyard done first.
In response to: Re: Sharing the wisdom within
eudemonismSenior Contributor
Re: Sharing the wisdom within
Not telling family about mh is very brave and courageous @Zoe7 i had no choice, my mh was exposed to every man and their dog within a 50k radius. I didn't put much thought into what was happening at the time. Hindsight, insight and foresight... are wonderful things... on the way home from shops i thought, i wasn't in the most favorable of conditions, from a very young age... i never even considered I'd fall Ill with mh problems, i think I'm still partly in denial...
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