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Coming to terms with reality

eudemonismSenior Contributor02 Aug 2017, 7:01 pm AEST

Coming to terms with reality

Hi Readers, i am suffering from "mental health issues" and it is an ongoing, daily battle. I am pretty much constantly wrestling with the thoughts going on in my mind. And my psychical life seems too be suffering for it. (There is a huge difference between physical and mental ) something is definitely not right! So each day I'm waking up and going about my routine. And over the last few days, weeks and months. I have been noticing changes in my mentality toward myself, others and life. And some questions such as, what is my life about? And what should my objectives be? Have arisen... of course like we all are, I'm subject too making decisions... and there has been the same options in front of me time and time again for months on end. And it becomes rather draining and mundane. And i feel myself going around in circles like something simple just ain't connecting.

I enjoy writing, art, music. And peace of mind... walking, reading, meditation. Taking care of myself. Socialising. Etcetera. Getting ahead, getting in front. Planning, dreaming and so on. And do my best to look after myself. While accepting that it can only ever be so much.

But there just something not quite right. And I'm suffering for it on a daily basis. And I'm tired and fed up with going through the same stuff everyday. And in all honesty. Alot of my suffering comes from prospective and thought processes.

Does anyone wanna talk with me about some things that might help? In particular dealing with people no matter who they are. Can be very stressful and cause lots of procrastinating about pros and cons. In particularly people who i think about reaching out to for support. Because of dilemmas dramas and social dynamics. And picking up on things that "aint really happening" "gut feelings type of stuff " "intuition" that type of thing. And enjoying time with people is great! I just tend to be overly preoccupied with symptoms to be worried about socialising sometimes "Symptoms which involves others"

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In response to: Coming to terms with reality

eudemonismSenior Contributor23 July 2018, 4:23 am AEST

Re: Sharing the wisdom within

@Grasshopper3 good morning, how are you going? Any progress with the son? Eude.

In response to: Re: Sharing the wisdom within

Grasshopper3Senior Contributor23 July 2018, 4:49 am AEST

Re: Sharing the wisdom within

@eudemonism

Morning Eude!

I woke up a while ago and can't get back to sleep either, so made myself a cuppa tea and had a muffin. I know, bad choice I shouldn't eat during the early morning hours!

It so very interesting to read your convo with @Sophia1.

It must help her a lot how you explain how you felt about your mum at times. I get that you want her to 'fix' it and how you feel misunderstood all the time.

My son is doing ok, although he likes his beers. He is still taking his meds and told me the other day if it wasn't for me, he wouldn't bother.

I'm trying to figure out his triggers and loneliness is one of them. He's not doing good all by himself all day, when I'm at work. He is slowiy starting to make social contacts around him, and goes to a job agency every fortnight by himself, also seeing a chiro by himself.

If he has nothing to do he walks to the bottlo and buys himself a sixpack.

He doesnt want to earn money as he knows he will spend it all on alcohol he says.

I am currently thinking of setting up a trustfund or something, where he (and I) can deposit money in and he can't take it out by himself?

Anyway, small steps at the time, @Sophia1 and Eude, I am here for you if you need a chat.

Grasshopper3

In response to: Re: Sharing the wisdom within

Sophia1Senior Contributor23 July 2018, 10:33 am AEST

Re: Sharing the wisdom within

Good morning @eudemonism @Grasshopper3

I am more an early bird......not up before 5am though...hopefully you both have a good block of sleep tonight...

I know that feeling where the mind will just not switch off....

Eude ...I imagine that the concept of talking about why you drink would be hard with others....you have just started going...as hard as it might be try not to focus on someone who might be offended....they might just be going through a rough time with their own triggers....ring the person who has offered support when you feel triggered and tempted to have a drink...that person is letting you know that they are there for you...

there was a post some time ago started by Utopia about the difficulty in stopping alcohol....you could do a few word searches on here and see what pops up...you might find some similar feelings to yours...

Eude.,..Grasshopper....my "family member" has an icy tone voice talking about others....he believes that he and myself are in danger ...our lives...the icy tone is not him talking...it is the voice of one of the delusions..

no is not on medication...he possibly has some anger with me...as his mum wanting me to fix it as you said...not understandng why this is happening to him...the little boy in him wanting all of the bad stuff to go away...I understand that...a natural reaction...Of course I just want to hug him and hold him....

windy here again today...cloudy...

need to get to the library again ...possibly tomorrow when I go to the physiotherapist...will try to find a more humourous book to read...the one that I am reading is very good...sad though...is about racism...do not need more sad at the moment...

am distracting myself with old historic buildings and places... on living with ourselves thread...I love the history and different cultures all over the world...

speak soon

Sophia

In response to: Re: Sharing the wisdom within

Sophia1Senior Contributor23 July 2018, 11:31 am AEST

Re: Sharing the wisdom within

hello again @eudemonism

if you are interested

I did a bit of a search re alcohol triggers and found these four threads..words from others on here struggling and their ideas..

you will have to type them into the search bar as I do not know how to link them

"Any recoverying alcoholic or alcoholic in the forum,"

"Going off alcohol,"

"I think i may be an alcoholic,"

Alcohol & Personality Changes

In response to: Re: Sharing the wisdom within

eudemonismSenior Contributor23 July 2018, 2:29 pm AEST

Re: Sharing the wisdom within

@Grasshopper3 I'm in a similar dilemma, I'm around people 'like myself' loneliness is definitely a trigger. I sometimes don't speak my mind to those visiting me, or want to say something to those who I'm visiting, and if I don't, I bottle it up in the unconscious. I'd truly be hopeless if I had to live with someone else permanently. Once it gets bottled up in the unconscious, it's hard to get out without getting, a little worked up, stuff like table manners, etiquette, morals, standards, guidelines, being as independent as possible, respecting people and their personal space. It all balances out though I suppose... If your friends an family don't tell you how it is, who will?

There's that power struggle for superiority, an individuals interpretation of right and wrong upon others. Giving and receiving it...

I rebuked this guy about his drinking, and I said a few words, tried to influence him into rethinking and not drinking, I've spent a lot of time with him in recent months. It's my own fault as much as his, we sort of care for one another, or find up social needs within each other... And it's very testing at times...because after spending so much time with someone, you find out all the good and bad bits of their personality, which pretty much cannot be changed, but at left to deal with regardless. You know! Then a woman once in awhile comes onto the scene and oh jeez, I really have to hold my tongue, and every time I do that, my unconscious mind begins filling up with resentment, which is a direct result of other people's behaviours which I can't control, but expect to be better than what they are. Too bad if I Don like my life and my situation... Eude

In response to: Re: Sharing the wisdom within

eudemonismSenior Contributor23 July 2018, 3:52 pm AEST

Re: Sharing the wisdom within

@Sophia1 Yea OK, I'll have to reply at a later time or in the morning. I'm feeling very tired at the moment mate thanks for understanding. Eude.

In response to: Re: Sharing the wisdom within

eudemonismSenior Contributor24 July 2018, 4:19 am AEST

Re: Sharing the wisdom within

@Sophia1 good morning... How are you feeling today? Got anything planned? Today I get my advance money, so I'll be doing some things down the street, I didn't want to borrow money as it needs to be paid back, and impacts my total amount each fortnight. So I'm spending it wisely...

I'm wanting more out of life hey, I struggle to cook and prepare myself decent food on a regular basis, eating healthy and a healthy lifestyle is hard work. Can't seem to get it right and I can't seem to win. Eude.

In response to: Re: Sharing the wisdom within

Sophia1Senior Contributor24 July 2018, 10:48 am AEST

Re: Sharing the wisdom within

good morning @eudemonism

It is good that you have access to an advance if you have a need to stock up on quality food..

Yes you have to pay it back...however if you went shopping each fortnight when you receive your pension you would still be paying that amount on food...

The hardest part is not to spend it all at once....

frozen vegetables are a great stand by when not feeling motivated...

off to library hopefully today after physiotherapist...

In response to: Re: Sharing the wisdom within

eudemonismSenior Contributor25 July 2018, 5:34 am AEST

Re: Sharing the wisdom within

@Sophia1 Yea I'm great at spending money 😊 I'll work it out, I'll get there in the end... I've been getting up rather early the last few days, I'm not sure why, but I'm trying to make the most of it.

I got the hand casters and fishing line I been wanting to get for a few weeks now. Dog I registered. I got some molasses. I got a couple tickets. But couldn't register my car for another twelve months as I haven't even started the three months rego I paid for awhile ago. Can't double bank the rego up or something, so u have to wait until next Monday.

I seen mum and dad yesterday. Seeing them get older is a bit worrying. But they seem well with all things considered.

Some of the books I ordered from the library have come in. I got a text yesterday afternoon to let me know they were in. So I went and loaned them out and have begun reading. It's really great to read about stuff from the treatment side of things, rather then being treated side of things. I'm finding an abundance of good information that I'm learning from. All very relevant to people and life in general.

How was library and physiotherapist session? Eude.

In response to: Re: Sharing the wisdom within

eudemonismSenior Contributor25 July 2018, 8:48 am AEST

Re: Sharing the wisdom within

@Sophia1 I'm starting to think about a job / working / a career / employment.. I'm thinking about what I'd be faced with..

Thinking about quitting smoking and coffee also... Eude

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