Coming to terms with reality

@Former-Member

Thanks for your input. I think I'm just reflecting on everything that was going through my mind when I was unwell. And I'm trying to work out why it was happening in the eyes of psychology rather than psychiatry.

I've spent a lot of time trying to justify myself and plead my sanity too the professionals. (trying to escape the prisoner of psychiatry thing) it's all slowly falling into place... But unfortunately the end result is still a gruelling battle...

I've been struggling to get through each day for many years now. And it don't look like anything is going to change in a hurry. It's especially bad when in the middle of an episode.

Eude.

Good morning @eudemonism

I understand where you are coming from with the difficulty of personal space....applying the theory of that in the environment where you live...As you say there are other unwell men there...with social needs the same as yours....

I imagine that it can become quite intense at times....

yes of course you want connection with some of your neighbours....

my talking about personal space probably sounds very airy fairy as well as impractical...

I still believe that if you have the concept in your mind you can practise this for your own benefit....allowing you to quietly take one step back and move aside if someone is overbearing...no need to say anything...

this is for your benefit....a part of the new you who is emerging and learning to know yourself...like yourself...personal space also allows us to respect ourselves...

All of the ideas that I mention are suggestions.....you know your own situation...environment...the best...

you choose what is best for you not others...

The trauma that you endured is intangible...your grief immense...the path that your mind took to compensate for such a huge loss must have been a huge ordeal for you...I cannot begin to imagine....I feel so sorry when I read about such grief that people carry...

I have my own grief...different again...still a loss...It has robbed me of about 4-5 years of my life that I will never get back..another pile added to previous life traumas one after the other...we humans seem to push onwards...I know that I have been in auto-pilot mode for so long now ...the beginning is blurred into a former life where memories are vague..

I work very hard at living with each day...my life is still important...as are my loved ones...rediscovering me ...not letting others rob me of who I am ...makes me more determined than ever now to live my life...in a world where I connect strongly with my environment..

I think that a visit to the gp to discuss reducing your depot injection then coming off it altogether is a great idea...possily slowly introducing oral medication....if you decide to do this ...it is important to ask the doctor the time frames...possible side effects...symptoms....
Sticking it out is probably the hardest part for most people...most important not to stop cold turkey...

do you have a mental health worker with whom you get along...trust? Someone who can support you if you make the move to change medications? as well as your gp of course...

Your back yard make-over...that is the latest buzz phrase ....sounds great....

what I was imagining actually...

love the concept of a fire pit...they are so welcoming...warm ...inclusive to some great story telling...do any of your neighbours play an acoustic guitar or harmonica?

Talking to a person confidentially and in more depth about your intimate needs.....have you ever used the men's health helpline? They might have some suggestions .....

https://www.healthdirect.gov.au/ there is an index that can answer some of your health issues international ph no 1800 022 222..they might be able to provide information on a helpline ...

I can say to you that it is a very natural...healthy desire....that should not be dismissed....talking about this with someone who can provide you with some information is a step in the right direction...

There is also this page here on the Sane website....

https://www.sane.org/media-centre/the-sane-blog/1716-sex-intimacy-and-mental-illness ...

Great to hear that you are continuing to think through thoughts that pop in and out of your mind....expressing all of this on here is so beneficial for you ....I am proud of how far you have come Eude....

talk again...take care

@eudemonism Its important to see yourself as a human first with genuine wide ranging psychological needs, rather than a psychiatric patient. It would have been difficult to lose your brother. Its understandable that the grief process was complicated.

My cat, Patch, is 16, so getting on, and a he. I got 2 brother kittens from a litter when my son was young. We have had them since 6 weeks. My son loves them.

I agree with @Sophia1 to reduce/change meds gradually within the guidelines set by doctors. But you do have some choice about which doctors. So it is worth doing a little doctor hunting.

It is very natural to want the least side effects and level of medication to help manage symptoms. Nobody wants to go back into crisis. So be careful, but I know it can be possible. It depends on lots of things.

Take Care

@Sophia1

I'm the only one I know who mucks around with a guitar and harmonica. My neighbours generally stay pretty quiet. Although I have heard someone practising a clarinet or flute in one of the places around me.

I get annoyed at my friends when they borrow or lend stuff from me. Because it puts pressure on the relationship. It clearly tells me they can't manage their own finances properly. And it cuts into my supplies and quite simply... I don't have very much myself... And lastly it's happening because of the decisions they're making.

Eude

@Appleblossom

Alot of my anxiety is caused bye thinking about how people have negatively impacted my life. And I go into this frame of mind because I don't have everything I need. I try to work it out. I try to deal with it. And I try to do something about it. And when I say negatively impacted me. I mean, done me wrong. And it's really hard to understand and work out.

No matter who I'm dealing with. And I do see it everywhere. There's always this superiority complex or inferiority complex that people are going through. And it's kind of unavoidable... And very toxic to be surrounded with... Even the remnants of going through it...

Eude

@Former-Member

Words are great to use as coping mechanisms. And too understand what is really going on. it can work for or against the individual. They can be toxic or pleasant. Getting the actions right is the hard bit.

Eude

@Appleblossom

The professionals I've been dealing with and their superiority complex problems are a classic example.

Eude

@Appleblossom

I believe the system loves employing people who have superiority complex issues. Because they use it against all the consumers of the services. And then the consumers turn around and use it on the general population. And they make financial gain from the situation. And they gain control / brainwash the population.

Eude

hello @eudemonism

Great stuff...play guitar and harmonica...that is better than medication...

the two combined would help even moreso....keep on playing...

add a flute or clarinet ....a great jamming session around a fire pit....certainly help lift one's mood

I agree about lending things....I learnt the hard way a long time ago...be very selective...to the point where I just stopped...

even sister has disagreed with which book was hers...I have had to write my name in them now...

Some people are chronic borrowers...I refer to them as..they use people who have things that they don't have...then disrespect the trust and don't look after them..sometimes not returning them. This is encroaching on your trust....personal space stuff as well...

I have said to some people...I don't like lending certain things as I never know when I might need them...I need them to be at hand...not have to chase someone up to get them back...something along those lines...

hope that you have a good day

I can really see you with a guitar and harmonica. @eudemonism

Music helps in so many ways .. with feelings .. and also socially .. hang onto it.

Borrowing can be neighbourly ... the classic cup of sugar ...or cigarette ...if it goes both ways... but as we get on ... you hope people have figured out a few things ...you are right ...it can be a sign of not being organised ...

Sad to say but I think the superiority complexes are all around and so I need to work out my attitude to dealing with that type of person and interaction without taking it personally and feeling ...putdown ...

I am getting tougher when I encounter it ... not getting thrown ... even push back on it a bit ...