Re: Learning about Relationship Boundaries

very interesting @Appleblossom

@cloudcore

@Appleblossom it is strange wht sticks in our mind sometimes as 30 years ago when i was single and 27 I went for a holiday and one day a Lady on the same holiday did not know me but she said " that I will be looking for a father friger to be my husband --- " WHAT , no way I thought

Oooh @Shaz51

That could be said to be very forward and rude of her.

Some people think they can say anything.

I have had many one liners dumped on me too. Finally getting older and wiser.

So it is over 6 years ago that I put up list on opening post. Have I made any progress in understanding and establishing healthy boundaries? Not sure. Tomorrow is a popularly accepted boundary in time. I am going to try and be assertive more often as a general way of sociallising, less people pleasing, and being less of a pushover. Speaking more firmly and directing and voicing my concerns. Recovering from being gobsmacked ... making joke and moving on.

Friends on here with better sense of boundaries than I ...

@Shaz51 @Zoe7 @Anastasia @Faith-and-Hope @Eve7 @HenryX @Wanderer @Historylover @wellwellwellnez @BPDSurvivor @NatureLover

and others ....what do you think?

Having awareness of boundaries is a start @Appleblossom - whether we are right every time is a different matter.

Sometimes, we need to be assertive. Sometimes, we need to please. Sometimes, we need to open our mouths. Sometimes we need to keep our mouths shut. There's a season and time for everything.

Having an awareness of healthy boundaries is the first step. I have this awareness, but there are times when I overstep the mark. I'm not always 'right'.

You give me waaaaay too much credit, thank you @Appleblossom x

In all the time I have known you here @Appleblossom you have showed considerable growth in so many ways ...and boundary setting is one of those. There are so many things you used to just 'put up with' but I have seen you become more confident to both voice your opinion and also just walk away when there is no point. You have gone through a hell of a lot in your years but what I have seen is a determination and courage to take on new things, fight for what you believe in and surround yourself with the right people for you - and those all take boundaries to do. So give yourself a well deserved pat on the back for your growth, your strength, your determination and also the boundaries you have already set and will be able to set moving forward

Sometimes, we need to be assertive. Sometimes, we need to please. Sometimes, we need to open our mouths. Sometimes we need to keep our mouths shut. There's a season and time for everything.--- this is soo true my @BPDSurvivor

I think there is a time for everything @Appleblossom , sometimes we get it wrong and sometimes we get it right

the specialist wanted mr shaz to be more assertive , so i tried to encourage him to speak up , but he has left the reins up to me to say something or do do something all the time

am learning to say "No" more

and I am finding it harder with caring for 2 other family members

I agree with @Zoe7

@Appleblossom

Xxx