when is it time for hospital

OMG @outlander

I missed this one - you mean she actually dragged you into her bedroom - my stars - that is ASSAULT!!!!!

I hope you can sleep tonight - I can hear that you are so tired you don't as if you can sleep - I have been like that now and again - and it is an unpleasant feeling

I guess you don't want to let down your guard

There is so much wrong where you are living - I am still here - I was having my dinner - I have not been that hungry either but I had to eat

Care for yourself and there is no need to be sorry - we all understand what a hard time you are having - and this is so hard for you - it's very obvious

Yet none of us know exactly what you are going though - you alone know that

Dec

Oh I am sure she enjoys herself @outlander - it's a power-trip

She has a lot staked in having you being the slave-girl in all of this - the thing is - you need to have a bigger stake in being stronger - and she is assaulting you when she does this - when anyone who lays their hands on another person like that is assault - and that is seriously wrong

Yes - that is scary - what you are going through and have been going through - that is so bad -

Okay - one tablet or half a tablet at a time and let it go all the way down before you start with the next one - I used to have trouble swallowing tablets myself

I take it you are able to talk to your therapist when you need to - I think it would be a good idea to ring her first thing if you feel you need to - it sounds to me as if you are sitting on a power keg and this is not good - getting out of there if you feel you need to is something to seriously consider

It can't be good waiting for someone to start yelling at you - I have been there myself with my mother - and the silent treatment went on for days or longer - depending on her mood or what terrible deed she thought I had done and I will never know and I don't care anymore

So - none of us want to you to do anything you don't want to but the main thing is that you get out of the trap where you are atm

And we care a lot

Dec

Just dropping this in here too @outlander (below) .... breathe .... and recognise that you are fearing the worst .... but the worst is rarely the outcome ..... there is a whole range of possibilities, including that your mum is really mad on your behalf, and will sort out her bf's behaviour .... it also lets him know that you and your mum not only talked, but will continue to talk, so his behaviour is no longer hidden.

Take some deep, slow breaths @outlander .... that feeling of throat constriction is a form of panic attack that I have had before ..... and it can cause a tightness in your jaw as well. Just knowing that that was what it was helped me to relax and let it go ....

Breathe, and practice relaxation activities ..... and drinking chamomile tea helps too.

💜