Grief & loss - may be triggering

@Adge @Former-Member have been reading your posts and can relate to some of what each of you have experience.

the friend thing for me has always been affected by my mental illness even when I had not mentioned the illness. Hate that term illness!,!

one can be surrounded with family loved ones and still feel very much alone.

you both are giving each other so much.

You have friendship right here. Honest and caring. You both are being such wonderful friends to each other.

take care of yourselves always.

will try to pop in and out every now and again. Xxxxx

Thanks @Adge, needed some empathy. Winter makes everything harder I think, magnifies the gloomy, somehow. Woke with racing heartbeat to sirens near, followed by two helicopter flyover 😞 - triggers flashbacks, and tears (I'm sick of it) but coming good now, 2-3hrs later. Nobody understands that I can't control these invasive thoughts and feelings. Just have to ride the waves.

Its good you stepped up and attended the Topic Tuesday last night. Know what you mean about feeling exhausted after concentrating for two hours, and all the waiting. I find refreshing the page frequently helps me catch new posts. There's probably an easier way - @NikNik would know, but on my mobile here I go back a page and return, kinda tweek the pages. Glad you found it helpful.

Thanks for your forum friendship 💜

Let me know later how your day went
🌷🌿🐦

@Former-MemberI understand needing empathy, so do I. Especially at the moment - I've been having horrendous emotional flashbacks (nothing visual) over the last few days.

Intense despair feelings & heightened anxiety. I really don't know any exact triggers that are causing - except that the on-going uncertainty of daily work shift hours (constantly changing) is really triggering & leaves me feeling helpless in itself.

I'm often super-sensitive to noises outside (& inside) my house, so I see how a helicopter fly-over would be triggering for you. That sort of thing is for me too.

I could not work out how to refresh the page during last night's discussion - so I just kept re-checking the notifications (Bell picture), to see if any new comment had popped up.

I supposedly will have Tuesdays off work from next week. They've agreed to it, although I don't fully trust that they will do what they said. Because they've still left me listed in the printed roster (for the next 2 weeks), & because there have been so many sudden shift changes already this week.

I've already lost a lot of work hours (been given far less) on other days this week, which is hard financially. Some staff told me that sudden loss of hours seems to be (sometimes) a punitive action by managers - as penalty for being assertive, or for explaining what shifts (or clients) that we cannot work with (or cannot do).

I'm trying not to jump to any conclusions, yet the loss of income (especially Tuesdays) is a lot.

I'm trying to re-schedule some appointments onto Tuesdays (on-going), which is extra change & uncertainty that I don't want at the moment.

I'm finding it really hard-going at the moment, which I think you appreciate. It sounds like you are too.

Yes we can't control those invasive thoughts & feelings, I get that too. I really do. It sometimes takes me many hours (or even days) to recover from being triggered.

I feel like crying, though the tears rarely ever come.

Thanks for your forum friendship too.

I still love those little pictures you put in at the bottom, I can't seem to find pictures to do that.

Adge